livinglife2019 Posted January 17, 2018 Share Posted January 17, 2018 So the guy I was seeing for the last 3 months broke up with me, things where going realativly well the last few weeks and we seemed to be becoming closer. He moved closer to me, even invited me over to see his new place and meet his roommates. Then he went to visit friends and family for the weekend and it all changed, he texted me on Sunday asking if I was able to take and then changed it to I might call over instead. He arrived and it looked like he'd seen a ghost we sat down and chatted and he said he didn't see a future with me. I explained if that's how he felt then there was nothing I could do about it. I asked why and he said that he couldn't see us sitting down reading books together, which I thought was odd. Anyway we left on good terms, however the next day he had signed up to a dating site and began hitting on my cousin. He didn't know she was my cousin and he asked if she wanted to hook up. she continued to chat and found out that the day after he broke up with me he hooked up with his **** buddy. That hurt because I thought he liked me, yet moved on so quick. I haven't spoken to him since the break up and I am finding it hard, but keeping myself busy to cope. I was initially going to text him this weekend and ask if he was up for grabbing a drink or coffee but now I dont know. My friends have said something must have happened when he was visiting his family and friends the day before he broke up with me and that's why there was such a huge change or because he moved to a new area and he wants to see what the women in the area are like. I would love to know what happened and ask why the sudden change, I would even like to become friends with him because I do like his company. Ideally I'd like to meet him, have the chats and ask if he wanted to be friends if he agreed I'd explain that I might need some time and that I wasn't ignoring him and would be in touch when I felt comfortable enough to be his friend. I do plan on texting him and asking if he wants to me if he declines well I'll know for sure he doesn't want anything to do with me. How should I go about texting him, or what should I say? Link to post Share on other sites
Gaeta Posted January 17, 2018 Share Posted January 17, 2018 This is a really bad idea. I am sorry you are disappointed, it sucks that the relationship didn't last but you have to accept it and move on to something better. For all you know this man cheated on you all of the time you were dating, you liked him a great deal and maybe even falling in love but for him to break-up and hook-up with someone else the following day indicates he wasn't taken by you as much you were by him. Is this really the type of person you want for friend? Now, I know you like his company, of course you do you were in a relationship with him because you liked him, but you only want to remain friends because you are having a hard time imagining life without him. That phase will pass. Forget about him, he's not worth it. Something and someone better is waiting for you. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
smackie9 Posted January 17, 2018 Share Posted January 17, 2018 (edited) You can draw your own conclusions...I doubt he will tell you because if he wanted to he would have done so. He isn't interested in confrontation or hurting your feelings so he avoids it. I hate to say it but when they do a 180, it's usually because they found something better on the menu or they went back to having leftovers (ex). Edited January 17, 2018 by smackie9 Link to post Share on other sites
Gaeta Posted January 17, 2018 Share Posted January 17, 2018 Livinglife here is something for you. I am sorry I could not find a better quality copy but it's the message that's important. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WJ-aWRVm9uQ 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Zahara Posted January 17, 2018 Share Posted January 17, 2018 I would love to know what happened and ask why the sudden change, I would even like to become friends with him because I do like his company. Ideally I'd like to meet him, have the chats and ask if he wanted to be friends if he agreed I'd explain that I might need some time and that I wasn't ignoring him and would be in touch when I felt comfortable enough to be his friend. I do plan on texting him and asking if he wants to me if he declines well I'll know for sure he doesn't want anything to do with me. How should I go about texting him, or what should I say? I don't believe there was a sudden change. Based on your last few threads, it does seem that he wasn't really invested in this relationship. I believe you also had two "major" fights with him in this short span and that can turn interest off especially when a relationship is very young. Don't text him. He's broken up with you. Use the time to heal and detach. You'll probably get to a point where you won't even care about being friends with him. Most times dumpees use the "friends" because they want a foot in the door, in their hope that the dumper may change his mind. Move on. It doesn't seem like he was very interested. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
whichwayisup Posted January 17, 2018 Share Posted January 17, 2018 Do not text him! Post here whenever you feel the urge to reach out to him. He broke up with you and is doing whatever he pleases, quite happily! If you contact him it'll make you look weak in his eyes. Don't give him that control and satisfaction over you! Be strong, find self love and respect. It hurts and you're in pain but he ain't worth it! 3 Link to post Share on other sites
Been Posted January 18, 2018 Share Posted January 18, 2018 Don't ever text someone who breaks up with you. It makes you come across as needy and desperate and they will play on that. Link to post Share on other sites
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