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Blocked after argument!


Breaks and Breaking Up It happens to most everyone at some point in life! Share your experiences!

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Old 27th December 2017, 11:14 PM   #16
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Originally Posted by Sugarandspice2 View Post
So 5 days ago we had an argument because he was being nastyabout the fact that I had family over from out of the country and he wasnít ableto go out alone with me for that night. I called him out on being nasty andrude and he didnít like it so he said some things and ended it with ďhave agood nightĒ. I responded back but realized that he blocked me. I waited it outand thought he would unblock me for Christmas and he didnít. We both planned tobuy each other something for Christmas.


Fast forward today is his birthday and I am still blocked.In the past he used to block me after arguments and I would reach out fromother numbers to contact him and we would make up..but I realized that loweredmy self worth. Weíve been together for 10 months. I am not doing that anymore. Noteven wishing him happy birthday. What really hurts is that I just had amiscarriage a few weeks ago and heís treating me like this. I am not surprisedat all at his behavior because I realized heís very selfish..only cares abouthimself. I feel like I should just go no contact without closure and move on.What do you guys think?
That part just shows he can't resolve conflict with you effectively at all. If he's selfish and doesn't care about you, do you really want to spend any more time with this guy?

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Originally Posted by Sugarandspice2
Yea the game would usually be to reach out to him from other numbers/emails to "show him that I want to be with him". Games get old and I've had enough....
You've shown that. He's not returning the favour unfortunately. You may want to be with him, but sadly it doesn't sound like he wants to be with you. Don't put yourself through this any more. Run!
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Old 28th December 2017, 1:34 AM   #17
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He's not a man, he's a boy. Forget about him.
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Old 28th December 2017, 1:45 AM   #18
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I'm so sorry you've lost your child and had a rotten Christmas.

Yes, you should absolutely move on without speaking another word to him. As far as I'm concerned, when a person blocks us or goes AWOL it constitutes them having left the relationship. You don't owe anything to a person who has left already.
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Old 28th December 2017, 10:16 AM   #19
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Originally Posted by LilySun View Post
Block... This guy doesn't deserve you for another second.

Immature and selfish, this guy. And, he is being emotionally abusive to you. I have been there and it will destroy you, if it hasn't already. Run away and don't look back.
Very emotionally abusive.. what's hurting so bad is the fact that there is no closure. I just want to get over this pain and move on. His sister contacted me yesterday and I feel like all my emotions just reset. Before that I was getting used to not talking to him and thinking to myself that this breakup is a blessing in disguise.
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Old 28th December 2017, 6:45 PM   #20
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Originally Posted by Sugarandspice2 View Post
Very emotionally abusive.. what's hurting so bad is the fact that there is no closure. I just want to get over this pain and move on. His sister contacted me yesterday and I feel like all my emotions just reset. Before that I was getting used to not talking to him and thinking to myself that this breakup is a blessing in disguise.
Sweetie it's normal it hurts and it will for a while. Getting over a break up takes times you have to accept it and go through every step of mourning. Closure is something you offer yourself, do not wait on a man to give you closure you'll wait forever. The way he mistreated you is enough closure for you to end this chapter with him. Be kind to yourself, spend time with the people that loves you the most in this life while you lick your wound.
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Old 28th December 2017, 6:47 PM   #21
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Originally Posted by Sugarandspice2 View Post
[...]


Fast forward today is his birthday and I am still blocked.In the past he used to block me after arguments and I would reach out fromother numbers to contact him and we would make up..but I realized that loweredmy self worth. We’ve been together for 10 months. I am not doing that anymore. Noteven wishing him happy birthday. What really hurts is that I just had amiscarriage a few weeks ago and he’s treating me like this. I am not surprisedat all at his behavior because I realized he’s very selfish..only cares abouthimself. I feel like I should just go no contact without closure and move on.What do you guys think?
This is not healthy. I am sorry for your loss
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Old 29th December 2017, 12:12 AM   #22
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I can only imagine. I hope you heal emotionally from your loss.

It's good you are seeing your boyfriend/ex for who he is. Living your life without him seems best.
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Old 29th December 2017, 12:24 AM   #23
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Originally Posted by Sugarandspice2 View Post
Very emotionally abusive.. what's hurting so bad is the fact that there is no closure. I just want to get over this pain and move on. His sister contacted me yesterday and I feel like all my emotions just reset. Before that I was getting used to not talking to him and thinking to myself that this breakup is a blessing in disguise.
You might never get closure and as time goes on you start caring less and less about that. Keep thinking it's a blessing, because it is. It's a slow thing but you get stronger and more glad it's over in time.

I thought I'd never be happy after my abusive relationship... I was very wrong. Glad I'm not still stuck there. I did take advantage of therapy, even, it helped alot. That is an option you may want to keep in mind.
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Old 29th December 2017, 1:23 AM   #24
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If a woman blocked me after an argument i'd be done with her.
that is not how adults act.
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Old 29th December 2017, 1:30 AM   #25
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Closure is over-rated.

Living a life that is free from an alcoholic, emotionally abusive partner is definitely not over-rated. Good for you for leaving this man behind. Life has better things planned for your future.

I am sorry for the loss of your baby. Although, I would not want to be co-parenting with this man, so perhaps there was a "bigger plan" for you...
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Old 29th December 2017, 1:56 AM   #26
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Sugarandspice2,

I am sorry for all the upset you've been having.

But better one Christmas ruined than years of your life.

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Mid twenties and yes he's an alcoholic
When you get into a relationship with an alcoholic (or anyone with any addiction) you will find that there will be 3 of you in the relationship, not 2. Moreover, the addiction will take priority over you every time.

Be very glad that this guy isn't in your life any more.Please get some counselling to deal with the loss of your child, there are agencies out there that will help you.
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Old 29th December 2017, 6:10 AM   #27
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Love this thread. It reminds me if why I should never be back with my ex. My ex bf and I used to have fights like this. So stupid and so immature. The last one we had ended something like this. It was nasty and I hurt like you did, but I saw the bigger picture and remained strong and never contacted him again. It took many stupid fights like this over one year for me to finally pull the plug and Iím so glad I did now. Iím mostly healed now and 8 months out and now heís starting to text me occasionally. Itís threads like this and me remembering how we were bad together that keep me strong. Stay strong and push thru. Complete NC is the only way.
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Old 29th December 2017, 6:18 AM   #28
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Originally Posted by 1fish2fish View Post

And are there any substance abuse issues with him?
Wow, how did you know? You called it, thatís amazing.
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Old 29th December 2017, 9:07 AM   #29
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Wow, how did you know? You called it, thatís amazing.
His behavior and how he handles conflict is similar to how my exbf acted (he's 47), and he is a very high functioning alcoholic.

Both of my parents were alcoholics, so staying in a dysfunctional relationship with him was "comfortable", so to speak, although I suppose I should be relieved that with my background, that was the only addict I've ever dated.

Since our break up (he dumped me by changing his profile picture on fb from one of us to one of his dog) I've been in counseling learning everything I can about addictions, addicts, and self esteem, so that I don't do a repeat. At 51, better late than never!
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Old 29th December 2017, 9:21 AM   #30
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Originally Posted by Popsicle View Post
Love this thread. It reminds me if why I should never be back with my ex. My ex bf and I used to have fights like this. So stupid and so immature. The last one we had ended something like this. It was nasty and I hurt like you did, but I saw the bigger picture and remained strong and never contacted him again. It took many stupid fights like this over one year for me to finally pull the plug and Iím so glad I did now. Iím mostly healed now and 8 months out and now heís starting to text me occasionally. Itís threads like this and me remembering how we were bad together that keep me strong. Stay strong and push thru. Complete NC is the only way.
Same here, Pop. I'm 8 mths out and mostly healed, too, and I got a Christmas breadcrumb (which I ignored).

Although my ex never blocked me per se, he stonewalled me occasionally when he would "get into a bad mood." *sigh*
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