Young love is complicated

[Aussiefirefighter95]

So our relationship was awesome for the most part, we fell hard and fast for eachother and it was the happiest either of us had been. We were best friends too, and she let me in, in a way that she had not trusted anyone with before.

 

The Breakup

it was tough, She was underperforming at work and she wasn't selected for finals either (Sport). I did my best to comfort her, helped with her university studies, was her emotional punching bag for the last month (I know a bad idea). She was not happy, she realised that we focused so much on eachother that she lost friends in the process (personally they were not great friends to begin with). She also admitted to saying no to going out with some of her work 'friends' because she did not want to upset me.

I Had a few issues, I was blunt and honest and sometimes a real downer, especially during this year as I was writing a thesis. I had gained a little weight too. I also had trust issues with past relationships. I also was her first serious Boyfriend and intimate partner.

I had issues, they were not mental disorders nor were they massive problems. But my ex ended it instead of trying to work through it with me. This crushed me so badly, I had given her plenty of chances when she really f**ked up. it was a complete blindside.

 

The Aftermath

Once NC was in play I identified my issues, sought professional help and boom habits were altered, the outlook had changed, I felt much better too. I dropped all my weight I gained and add plenty of muscle too. I missed her though, I could not stay angry at her. Her age, the fact I was her first and then all of her other negative **** in her life all attributed to her decision. I was not the source of it but a symptom.

 

The Reconnection

It was only 5 Weeks, I got a message near Midnight reading

"I know it's not fair on you but I really need you"

I replied with

"how bad?"

She explained a family member was dying, and she had no one to confide in. So I looked to my heart and It told me to help her. So I did. The next day we spoke on the phone for 6 hours discussing everything under the sun. The day after I saw her, it was so weird, we locked eyes and both our hearts felt something. We kept talking and I was honest with her, about fixing my bad bits, and I opened up to her properly. She really appreciated it too.

 

We had this connection and It was deeper, naked and raw. I knew it would not mean getting back together anytime soon but it showed that we both had love left to give. This prospered for almost 6 weeks. Constant contact, Jokes, cuddles even late night phone calls with me singing to her to help her sleep.

 

Then she said we need to stop talking to eachother, as her family believes her moods are worse after talking to me. The way she sounded she didn't seem convinced. But she always wants to please her parents. She told me this is not forever and that she one day Hopes to give me love and happiness. It was an amicable end.

Or so I thought, about a week after I saw some Tumblr posts from her about cutting toxic people out, she made status' of anger about all my shortcomings in the relationship. How when we reconnected it was just for sympathy and fun nothing more. That she had no love left to give and now she is so so happy and free.

 

My question is why? She has just gone through a ****ty couple of months. Am I the one that's getting the blame? Is she grieving/venting? Is she self-aware?

 

I know I did my best to heal her and I know what both of us felt, your eyes cannot lie. I had hope that we could rekindle this. I really love this girl, the good and the bad. What does everyone think?

P.S moving on is an obvious move here, but my gut is saying to close the door completely.

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**tl;dr**: She Came back after losing a family member, initially wanting sympathy but then we developed a deeper connection. Then her family told her to stop talking to me, she became hostile. Now we don't talk again

[usa1ah]

Turn your back and close this door. She is to immature for a real relationship.

 

Also if she did love you, her family telling her to stop talking with you would not have mattered to her. I actually believe it was a lie she told you so not to reflect on her. Blame the parents you know.

 

Keep healing and find someone else that you can actually put some faith into.