Lost and broken with no one to talk to

[Denny0220]

I got divorced several years ago. I had two l children with my exhusband. I took time and decided to reach out to an old boyfriend from high school. It was amazing and after some time he moved across the country to me and we began our relationship. It was amazing and everything I had ever wanted. I was sure he was my one and only, the man I would dedicated my life to. Things got rocky for various reason but we worked and kept talking and trying to fix our issues. Then things got worse. It's been about four years and he moved out three days ago. Just like that. Took everything he owned. I don't have any friends, as my life has been centered around my children and him. I am heartbroken... which is an understatement. I can't stop crying and have made the mistake of reaching out to him, hurt and wanting things back. I know that is wrong but I just want the pain to stop. It have no one to talk to and I hate putting my private life online, but I don't know what else to do. Can anyone offer any support?

[Darkchan]

I got divorced several years ago. I had two l children with my exhusband. I took time and decided to reach out to an old boyfriend from high school. It was amazing and after some time he moved across the country to me and we began our relationship. It was amazing and everything I had ever wanted. I was sure he was my one and only, the man I would dedicated my life to. Things got rocky for various reason but we worked and kept talking and trying to fix our issues. Then things got worse. It's been about four years and he moved out three days ago. Just like that. Took everything he owned. I don't have any friends, as my life has been centered around my children and him. I am heartbroken... which is an understatement. I can't stop crying and have made the mistake of reaching out to him, hurt and wanting things back. I know that is wrong but I just want the pain to stop. It have no one to talk to and I hate putting my private life online, but I don't know what else to do. Can anyone offer any support?

 

Hi there Denny0220!

 

I'm sorry to hear that it's been rough for you and that you seem to struggle a lot. Everyone here at LoveShack is very friendly and supportive and will lend you and ear when you need it. I know it's hard to reach out to stranger and tell them your story, but the good thing is that nobody knows who you are. You are free to mourn your loss and just vent in any fashion you like.

 

I have been using this site myself since 2 month ago when my ex of 3 years dumped me suddenly, behaving in a very hurtful way. I found it being a good thing for the healing process. Every time I feel like reaching out I would post in my thread instead, just to get it out from my system. And damn, even the time I write here it can still be hard to not text or call, but I have been strong and kept no contact.

 

So try stay strong and when you feel you are about to crumble and there are people here supporting you!

[Been]

I know all to well how you feel and I'm sorry your going through it. It sucks and I know you feel lost and confused now but it does get better with time.

I know that seem so easy for me to say when your hurting right now and everything seems to be falling apart.

But I was in the exact same situation as you- and I too felt just like you.

I felt like everything was falling apart and everything that could go wrong seemed to. Days seemed to just drag on and on. Nights never seemed to end. I couldn't think. Just going to work seemed like a major struggle.

What I did was use the pain/hurt to propel me to do/try things.

I got tired of being sad/feeling sad all the time.

And it was hard. I just had to make a decision. Change my mind set.

Just know if you need to talk/vent its ok- its part of healing.

If you need someone to listen to you its OK.

[Jdoublenn]

I know way too many of us here feel your pain. I'm so very sorry you're going through this

 

Did he reply to you reaching out?

[OptimismHopeTrust]

So so sorry for all your pain and hurt, it is hard. You will need time to grieve as he was a major part of your life for a long time which leaves a big void. I get it. But do not lose hope! You will move past this and you will heal.

In hindsight, you may have moved too fast with each other and you might not have known each as well as you thought. After time passes, couples then face challenges that they may not be equipped to handle or find out that they are not the people they thought. Either way, you need to spend time feeling what you feel. Allow yourself to do that and you will be able to move past this as hard as the journey is.

Spend time with your kids and enjoy them, especially in this wonderful holiday season. Spend time with yourself and do something special for yourself each day...whether it is a long walk, dinner with a friend, a phone call with a trusted family member, a special cup of coffee, joining a new group, etc. Make YOU the priority and love yourself. When the pain hits hard, distract yourself with something that makes you smile or assures you.

It will get better. If it feels too hard, reach out to a professional counselor for support. And always lean on family members who love you unconditionally and will be there for you. I wish you and your kids the best. You will come out on the other side of this.