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After 2 years together, I have been ghosted!


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I'm so hurt right now, I don't know where to begin. He said he wanted a life partner, a family and all. Everything was going fine the last time I talked to him through text like we usually do while we work our overnight jobs. He was very responsive and happy, then he stopped texting me at 3:04 AM when he usually stops at 5 AM and tells me he loves me before he goes to bed. Now, 2 days prior to this, I noticed his schedule getting strange. The first night it started, he stopped responding to me at 1:40 AM. Then, he text around 7:30 AM stating that he had gotten off work late because of the holidays. The 2nd day, he stopped texting around the same time.

 

I'm skeptical that there is someone else, but I'm more hurt at the fact that he couldn't end it properly after being together 2 years and just spending our 3rd Thanksgiving together. Here's where it really gets strange:

I called him a couple of times to see if he would answer and he usually does. I thought maybe to call him from another number to see if he atleast would answer and I could relieve worries of him being dead or alive. So, I called from another number and boom, a guy answers but it's not him, it's his cousin. His cousin tells me that my boyfriend came over early that morning to play his 2K18 video game and he had been there for 12 hours but left his phone on the charger the whole time. The cousin claims the only reason he answered was because my boyfriend had left the phone there by accident before he left and that he assumed that it was him calling to come back and retrieve the phone. That was 12 hours ago and I still haven't heard from my boyfriend.

 

He has done this before on his days off where he would go hours without responding to me and his lame excuse is always that he likes to chill on his off days uninterrupted. He claimed he is not cheating on me and that sometimes he just likes his alone time. I, however, do not believe this. I really believe he found someone else and is ghosting me. Everytime he comes to see me, he leaves his phone in the car. I told him I don't like it because it makes me believe he has something to hide. I have so many mixed emotions. The second time he did this, he claimed that he was going through something and wanted to clear his head. It's been 2 years and he doesn't see how much it hurts that he chooses to ignore me going on 2 days now. I can't believe he thinks it's okay to ghost me or replace me with another woman.

 

I just wanted to know should I wait to hear from him and should I respond angrily, understanding or not at all. To be honest, even if he does respond, I want to leave. I will talk to him and let him know how he made me feel, but now I have a big wall up dealing with him so that means the relationship is basically over. I just want the chance to vent to him and hear his responses if he ever does respond back to me. If he can choose a video game or another person over me, he doesn't really love me. It hurts to have to start over again, I really wanted to make it work with us. I guess we weren't on the same page and I never saw this coming.

Edited by ByMyself01
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i wouldnt wait to hear from him , i would leave immediately , sounds like he either wants to break up or more than likely he has found someone else , i would leave an dump him now !

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I'm skeptical that there is someone else, but I'm more hurt at the fact that he couldn't end it properly after being together 2 years

 

 

that's what I thought once after being ghosted after a 9 year relationship.

 

but trust me, you don't want or need that talk unless you like shoving barbed wire up your nostrils.

 

contrary to belief on this site, ghosting doesn't always mean they are scumbags and don't care. It's more that they just find it hard to tell you that they are no longer into you. I know it's hard when it is left in the air but you can't expect everyone to want to deliver negative/awful news.

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He finally got back to me to tell me that he's not ready for a relationship. He gave some lame excuse that I'm putting too much pressure on him to have kids and live together. Wasted 2 years of my time. People are so selfish. He knew the only reason I didn't move back to my home state was because I loved him and we planned for a future. Now I don't have a future with anyone and found out I never did. Life sucks sometimes. He still swears there's no one else. But I know there is. He started turning off his phone and working late. The usual cheating excuses.

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At least you’ve got closure now, and I know it’s an awful feeling wasting time with someone who isn’t on the same page as you, be grateful it wasn’t 5, 10 or even more years!

 

Stay strong :)

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Sorry, it sucks to be ghosted. SO much more painful than a clean break where you've been told the reasons why. It does sound like he has met someone else and doesn't want the hassle of having to face you and deal with breaking up with you. Let him go and move on.

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