I made a mess of things

[blackpajamas]

I just got dumped. It was a two year relationship. We started off great, despite being about an hour away. The last three months really took a turn for the worse. I started to lose some physical interest in her. I stopped showing her as much affection as I would have before. I took another job coaching, and it consumed all of my free time. I didn't visit her for a long time, but she would come down to the games and support me and stay at my place.

 

We has a minor discussion on my birthday, she said she needed a break. Couldn't keep pouring herself out like this while I made her feel unwanted and unloved. We talked about it, and decided to stay together and both work on things. She came to my family's Thanksgiving. The morning after, she left me. Saying that I needed to change, and that she gave up hope on me changing in the relationship. I texted her the following day, saying I needed to work on myself and I apologized for making her feel that way.

 

I've been no contact ever since, and really looking at ways to improve myself. The first two days all I could think about was reconciliation. I deleted her number and my social media apps to take a huge break from all of it. I've decided I do need to work on myself and am looking at therapy while working out more frequently.

 

She told me she didn't want to erase me from her life, and that she'd always care about me. Naturally I want her back now, despite the fact I showed little the last couple months. I plan to be NC for a month to start, then see how I feel. I have some things I need to work though before I date anyone again.

 

I just feel bad. I've moved to a small town, the options for dating at my age are very poor. She understood me very well, and I butchered it.

[ByMyself01]

I just got dumped. It was a two year relationship. We started off great, despite being about an hour away. The last three months really took a turn for the worse. I started to lose some physical interest in her. I stopped showing her as much affection as I would have before. I took another job coaching, and it consumed all of my free time. I didn't visit her for a long time, but she would come down to the games and support me and stay at my place.

 

We has a minor discussion on my birthday, she said she needed a break. Couldn't keep pouring herself out like this while I made her feel unwanted and unloved. We talked about it, and decided to stay together and both work on things. She came to my family's Thanksgiving. The morning after, she left me. Saying that I needed to change, and that she gave up hope on me changing in the relationship. I texted her the following day, saying I needed to work on myself and I apologized for making her feel that way.

 

I've been no contact ever since, and really looking at ways to improve myself. The first two days all I could think about was reconciliation. I deleted her number and my social media apps to take a huge break from all of it. I've decided I do need to work on myself and am looking at therapy while working out more frequently.

 

She told me she didn't want to erase me from her life, and that she'd always care about me. Naturally I want her back now, despite the fact I showed little the last couple months. I plan to be NC for a month to start, then see how I feel. I have some things I need to work though before I date anyone again.

I just feel bad. I've moved to a small town, the options for dating at my age are very poor. She understood me very well, and I butchered it.

 

I'm just curious to know what goes on in you guy's head when you pull away like this? Mines do the same thing. He has all the love and support there is but doesn't care. You said you stopped showing physical interest in her. Are you now unattracted? Did her looks change? Do you even know the answer as to why you're not showing any effort?