Nadine123 Posted October 7, 2017 Share Posted October 7, 2017 Hi all hope you're doing well. So I met this guy about 3 weeks ago and we ha an amazing time. He was visiting the city for 2 days but he ended up staying for 1 week after we meet. We had sex and it was great. Since he left he didnt really send me any msg, or he does is comment on my stuff and like it on facebook. I know all this social media stuff is stupid but unfortunately we live in 2017 and that is the way things work. I havent sent him a msg as well but i think all the liking and commenting is a sign of something. Maybe he doesnt want to send me a msg because he doesnt want to appear crazy or something. I know we met for a short time but we had an amazing connection. I havent fel this way with anyone. Link to post Share on other sites
ExpatInItaly Posted October 7, 2017 Share Posted October 7, 2017 Unfortunately, if he'd felt the same amazing connection, you'd have heard from him by now. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
nospam99 Posted October 7, 2017 Share Posted October 7, 2017 I havent fel this way with anyone. Every time I see an OP like this my first question is 'how old are you'? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Nadine123 Posted October 7, 2017 Author Share Posted October 7, 2017 there's no reason why he would comment and like my stuff if he doesn't want to stay in touch. Link to post Share on other sites
ZayKayWill Posted October 7, 2017 Share Posted October 7, 2017 If you really want to make a connection with him, stop playing the "Who is gonna message first?" game and just contact him. What do you have to lose? The worst thing that will happen is denial. Plenty of fish in the sea, especially if you are of the XX chromosome. Link to post Share on other sites
Redhead14 Posted October 7, 2017 Share Posted October 7, 2017 (edited) we had an amazing connection -- You had an amazing connection. He obviously wasn't that connected. There's a loose connection at best. there's no reason why he would comment and like my stuff if he doesn't want to stay in touch. -- Sure, there is -- you're a back up plan for when other options are dried up or when he's back in your town. He'll call you when it's convenient for him and wants sex. There's a song by Rick Nelson -- "I'm a travelin' man . . . and in every port I own the heart of at least one lovely girl." Stop lying to yourself. If the guy was truly interested and the connection was mutually amazing, he'd be calling you and setting up another date, etc. If all you need to have an amazing connection with a man is for him to sleep with you once and then like and comment on your posts on FB, you're gonna be pretty busy with one-night stands . . . Edited October 7, 2017 by Redhead14 6 Link to post Share on other sites
ExpatInItaly Posted October 7, 2017 Share Posted October 7, 2017 there's no reason why he would comment and like my stuff if he doesn't want to stay in touch. That's not exactly true. Liking and commenting on social is fine and dandy, but it takes next to no effort. It's an easy way to remind someone of your presence but not get too close. That way, if he's in your area again, he can reach out to you for another hook-up and you're much more likely to respond. So, in essence, he might want to keep in touch but probably not for the reasons you hope. How did you meet him? 3 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Nadine123 Posted October 7, 2017 Author Share Posted October 7, 2017 he was staying at the hostel I'm in. Link to post Share on other sites
Steve51 Posted October 7, 2017 Share Posted October 7, 2017 First off it is not how things work in 2017. It is how you accept it to work. I did very well never having a social media account from before the internet was even graphical. People hide behind social media to say the things they are afraid to say face to face. All you see online is what the other person wants you to see. Guys do have one night stands. For men, sex is more easily viewed as just sex. Not strings attached, two people giving each other pleasure. Women tend to view sex as an emotional connection and that is where the problem is. My wife and I were not monogamous for most of our marriage. We know that sex can be just sex and not making love. The two are very different. All I can suggest is that you do not engage is sex so quickly if you want more than just sex. Wait until you have established a relationship first. Many men will say anything to get into your pants and that is just the way it is. It is up to you to decide what to believe or not. I had sex with many women who thought that sex would make me want to date them again. It did not. In fact, out of 30 women I had sex with, I only had three relationships and very few dates. I just wanted sex and never pretended it was anything else. Some of the women thought differently and I even was stalked and had to move because a middle aged women thought our brief sex in her car was more than it was. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
ExpatInItaly Posted October 7, 2017 Share Posted October 7, 2017 he was staying at the hostel I'm in. I'm getting the impression you were a fling while he was on the road. How old are you both, if I may ask? Link to post Share on other sites
Cookiesandough Posted October 7, 2017 Share Posted October 7, 2017 I'm surprised your not creeped out he's viewing and liking your stuff but doesnt so much as message you "hey how've you been?" I don't know if that's how hookups normally go but it would make me feel like he was jogging memories of it for mental (maybe physical) masturbation... like 'oh yes I got with her and she's hot' I'd block hi m 2 Link to post Share on other sites
springy Posted October 7, 2017 Share Posted October 7, 2017 Have you tried reaching out to him? Link to post Share on other sites
Author Nadine123 Posted October 7, 2017 Author Share Posted October 7, 2017 no because I don't want to ve the crazy girl that texts a guy after a week. Link to post Share on other sites
Cookiesandough Posted October 8, 2017 Share Posted October 8, 2017 (edited) Call me old-fashioned, but I have been reading these boards for a long time and other boards even longer and I STRONGLY recommend not chasing a guy after sex by contacting him first. I don't recall ever seeing that go well for the woman, It gives him an ego boost and squashes her dignity. It was a hookup. You both had fun and that is all there's to it Edited October 8, 2017 by Cookiesandough 4 Link to post Share on other sites
ZayKayWill Posted October 8, 2017 Share Posted October 8, 2017 no because I don't want to ve the crazy girl that texts a guy after a week. If you want something you need to go after it. You control your own destiny. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Nadine123 Posted October 17, 2017 Author Share Posted October 17, 2017 I know but as i said i dont want to be the crazy girl that texts a guy after a one night stand. I just dont understand why he likes and comments on my stuff if he oesnt like me. Today I posted 3 different things 3 different timings and he commented on them all. maybe hes worried that he will be too clingy? also please dont be mean to me guys. I am aware that most of you are older an more experienced but im still learning here. Link to post Share on other sites
Highndry Posted October 17, 2017 Share Posted October 17, 2017 If you're looking for a long term relationship with him, then sleeping together on the first meeting was probably a fatal move. Don't get me wrong, it's not impossible, but extremely unlikely he's going to want you long term. A lot of guys won't ever fully trust a gal who gives it up so quickly. They figure she could easily be banging somebody else in much the same manner, so they kind of devalue her. We can have double standards, since obviously we were the willing participant. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Nadine123 Posted October 17, 2017 Author Share Posted October 17, 2017 (edited) I understand and im not looking for anything serious. Im just surprised from the way he is acting, especially on social media. This is what is confusing me the most. Usually guys just dissapear if it''s a one night stand, but the constant attention without msging is a bit strange. As i said i posted 3 different things today and he commented on them within seconds. also he can devalue me all he wants. This is a 2 way thing. Edited October 17, 2017 by Nadine123 Link to post Share on other sites
ExpatInItaly Posted October 18, 2017 Share Posted October 18, 2017 I understand and im not looking for anything serious. Im just surprised from the way he is acting, especially on social media. This is what is confusing me the most. Usually guys just dissapear if it''s a one night stand, but the constant attention without msging is a bit strange. As i said i posted 3 different things today and he commented on them within seconds. also he can devalue me all he wants. This is a 2 way thing. Not always. Some people are constantly on social media anyway, and if they want to keep you in their pocket for when they want another hook-up, they'll remind you of their presence. This is certainly not as unusual as you think it is; I've experienced it myself in the past. He's not afraid of looking clingy. I just think he'd like another roll in the sack if the opportunity presents itself, but he's not looking to actually date you. You would have had meaningful communication from him by now if that were the case. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Nadine123 Posted October 18, 2017 Author Share Posted October 18, 2017 you're completely right. I'm now starting to understand this better. just wondering how guys feel if a girl doesn't msg them? are they pleased? would they be expecting it? Link to post Share on other sites
Author Nadine123 Posted October 18, 2017 Author Share Posted October 18, 2017 hi guys just wondering how guys feel after a girl doesnt contact them after a one night stand. Link to post Share on other sites
5x5 Posted October 18, 2017 Share Posted October 18, 2017 Happy, indifferent or disappointed etc, it all depends upon the persons involved, the timing and a myriad of other things. Link to post Share on other sites
Shanex Posted October 18, 2017 Share Posted October 18, 2017 It usually just means it was just that: a one night stand. The worst thing would be to insist in contacting her. It doesn't mean the sex was awful. She just wanted a hookup and be done with it. Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted October 18, 2017 Share Posted October 18, 2017 I don't think anybody likes to be ghosted. Man or woman, NC after sex would leave most people confused. What's the big deal about making a clean break, saying it was fun but you don't want it to be long term? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Shanex Posted October 18, 2017 Share Posted October 18, 2017 I don't think anybody likes to be ghosted. Man or woman, NC after sex would leave most people confused. What's the big deal about making a clean break, saying it was fun but you don't want it to be long term? Some people are incapable of that, and women too. My last ONS was two years ago, sex was good for both of us and she ghosted, lacking the courage to tell me things properly even via a simple text. Good riddance. Link to post Share on other sites
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