SevenCity Posted July 25, 2017 Share Posted July 25, 2017 (edited) I haven't seen this posted before and it appears to be within forum rules so... I came across this site on another forum and read through the entire "Full Guide" today. I found it excellent. It's pretty much the same advice you would find on LS, but it is conveniently in one location and broken into situations / sections that most dumpees will experience. Even now, almost a year later, i was still able to take stuff from it. http://www.breakuprecoveryguide.com/ What I like about it most is the primary focus is they are not coming back and to focus on you. It may be hard to read for some people newly dumped, but I think you should regardless. Curious what others think and hope this can be helpful to people in this section. Edited July 26, 2017 by a LoveShack.org Moderator 3 Link to post Share on other sites
stockyoldfrump Posted July 26, 2017 Share Posted July 26, 2017 (edited) I haven't seen this posted before and it appears to be within forum rules so... I came across this site on another forum and read through the entire "Full Guide" today. I found it excellent. It's pretty much the same advice you would find on LS, but it is conveniently in one location and broken into situations / sections that most dumpees will experience. Even now, almost a year later, i was still able to take stuff from it. What I like about it most is the primary focus is they are not coming back and to focus on you. It may be hard to read for some people newly dumped, but I think you should regardless. Curious what others think and hope this can be helpful to people in this section. The part about overthinking an ex's communication with you is incredible helpful for me right now. Thank you. Edited July 26, 2017 by a LoveShack.org Moderator Link to post Share on other sites
Blanco Posted July 26, 2017 Share Posted July 26, 2017 This was one of the first sites I saw several years ago when I was in the immediate, "Holy crap, I feel like I'm dying" aftermath of the breakup. Agreed it was helpful, even if no writing existed in the world at the time that was going to make me feel OK. Refreshing to see something written about recovering from a breakup without it being a front for some lame system the site owner is trying to sell you. Link to post Share on other sites
stockyoldfrump Posted July 26, 2017 Share Posted July 26, 2017 This was one of the first sites I saw several years ago when I was in the immediate, "Holy crap, I feel like I'm dying" aftermath of the breakup. Agreed it was helpful, even if no writing existed in the world at the time that was going to make me feel OK. Refreshing to see something written about recovering from a breakup without it being a front for some lame system the site owner is trying to sell you. I also really liked that it was gender neutral. As a guy who was raised by predominately women, I have a tendency to WAY over-identify with women in every situation, even one that I'm involved in. So when I read other break up articles online, most of which are written by women for women, I would just think "oh, so this is what my poor ex must be doing right now!" and feel even worse. The fact that this was written from a very neutral POV was helpful. Link to post Share on other sites
1fish2fish Posted July 26, 2017 Share Posted July 26, 2017 Excellent resource! Link to post Share on other sites
Author SevenCity Posted July 26, 2017 Author Share Posted July 26, 2017 Hopefully the link is still there as the mods originally deleted. I too found most of the breakup recovery advice online to be geared towards women with the guy being a "jerk" - which is ironic because most of the dumping / divorces are initiated by women. It was nice to see this written gender neutral. I agree though in the initial shock no words will make you feel better but it serves as a good guide on how to react and what to expect. As much as people hate generalizations, breakups seem to follow a predictable script. Link to post Share on other sites
BrokenHeartedMan89 Posted July 27, 2017 Share Posted July 27, 2017 very helpful, i will give the guide a read, thank you. Link to post Share on other sites
BG1 Posted August 2, 2017 Share Posted August 2, 2017 Thanks for sharing a very useful resource SevenCity. I posted a post with a few good tips of advice, extract from a book and some personal points, http://www.loveshack.org/forums/general/general-relationship-discussion/623784-getting-over-break-up-manual Some of you may find it useful, it helped me especially as it's a quick way to remind yourself that can help to cope and heal in difficult times as a breakup Link to post Share on other sites
Jsos91 Posted August 2, 2017 Share Posted August 2, 2017 I appreciate the section about your ex reaching out. She's been reaching out every few weeks with items or logistical questions. I told her when she first reached out about emotional issues that I needed her to back off so I could move on... so now it's been meaningless messages. My friends and family are supportive, telling me not to reply and all of that. They also are making things worse though because they're going on about how she probably misses me and is trying to open a diologue and feel out how I am. It bothers me because I miss her like crazy so hearing all of that makes me read into things too much and I overthink everything. The guide made me feel better by saying nothing matters unless they want to reconcile, if you feel like you need to respond, keep it simple and without feeling. That's EXACTLY how I like to handle things when she reaches out. Link to post Share on other sites
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