4.5 years and recent breakup

[Meejustmee]

Hello all, I am new to this site. Please allow me to introduce myself.i am 43 years old. Divorced for 6 years. Ex husband cheated twice, last time I had enough and disnt stop the divorce proceedings. I have one child with whom is a teenager.

 

I met my ex boyfriend through a mutual friend 4 and a half years ago. He recently broke up with me. He has given me several different reasons. But in a nut she'll, I lost my job 5 months ago and purchased a new but old home 10 months ago. I started having problems with the house. I called my ex each time something broke. He owns his own remodeling business. Anyhow he said that I became too needy, which I am not but the things that. Rome in my house were things I knew nothing about and didn't have the money to call a professional.

 

Anyhow? I became resentful each time he got a call from a friend that needed his help and he sensed it, which caused problems. Yes, I accused him of other things bc who breaks up with someone bc their heater broke, the car needed fixing and so on....i t's been one month exactly, and in the beginning we spoke about every other day, then I just gave up. I was throwing the towel in and walking away. No sense it grrobbling. E went bc for 6 days on the 7th day he sent me an email that say TOY, ( thinking of you) have a nice day..... I was so happy to receive that, and I emailed him right back without even thinking. I said I am thinking about you too and enjoy your day as well. Ugh!! I should have never reaponsesz I didn't hear back from him and it broke my heart!! I was doing okay before that. Now all I want to do is get back together. He keeps saying I've probably moved on, I've probably started seeing someone...I haven't even considered seeing anyone else. So long story short, I said I guess this is it, and he wished me well, and said if only I wasn't so insecure....I hate to think that we are through!! Are we? I don't know what to do now!! So sad and broken hearted. Idk why but this is so much harder than my divorce! I am not ready to let him go!! Any advice would be greatly appreciated!

[William]

Moderator bump due to Auto-moderation ~T

[preraph]

If you have no real reason to think he was cheating, then you need to control yourself. It's your insecurity.

 

What I don't get is if you are always suspicious of him, why would you WANT him back? If he is a cheater, he's not going to change. If he isn't, then you made what you fear most happen by being insecure.

 

is he secretive?

Is he vague about stuff for no reason?

Does he make you work to get info out of him?

 

If yes, then he might be cheating. If he's transparent, says you can come along, introduces you to friends, etc., this may just be your problem. making him do free home repair isn't going to win his heart.