What do I do?

[ae15]

Hi there,

 

This is going to be ultra long but I felt the need to explain everything in full to give you the full picture.

 

I met this girl (17, same as me at the time, but she was a school year younger) at the start of November who I knew of and thought she was decent but talked to her for the first time and started dancing with her at an event. She seemed to really like me. We started to message all the time on Messenger. We met a couple more times in November for coffee.

 

I got invited to a party and got her in as my +1. At this party we got drunk and kissed a lot and did a few extra things. She said she had a free house on Monday and asked whether I wanted to come round. We had sex which I found alright, but at the time seeing her naked disappointed me a bit. I was still very happy to see her though and in December we met up a few times again. Unfortunately at least one of her parents were always in and she always worked for like the whole weekend. Opportunities for sex or meeting at all were quite rare.

 

Mid way through January she told me she had a free house and we were going to have sex. Unfortunately it fell on her period and she only ended up giving me a hand job, which was nice, but after that I felt really low about her and was sort of not wanting to see her anymore.

 

My hands became tied however when she invited me to this dinner in mid-March only a week or so later. I felt obliged to go not to embarrass her, even if I knew barely anyone going well enough to talk to them and hadn't ever spoken to her friends.

 

We then didn't meet for a couple of weeks, but when I did see her, my interest in her came alive again and I really started to love her for her personality.

 

We were meant to be going to a party again at the start of March, but it got called off at the last minute, so we ended up going out and just walking through town. We kissed a few times and it was just nice to spend that time with her.

 

I had the idea then to book us into a hotel the week after, but we found out that one of us had to be 18, and I wasn't until the week after. Luckily she had a free house a few days after anyway and we had sex which I enjoyed more than before.

 

We went to the dinner on the Friday, which was slightly awkward but not terrible. I met her parents that night and she met mine, even if they didn't know how close we really were.

 

The week after, I asked to meet up after school, but she told me she couldn't at the last minute. Later I found out that while we were at school she had messaged me telling me that she wasn't feeling it anymore, she didn't feel it was going anywhere and that she didn't want the extra stress of us. She seemed pretty adamant, but I managed to convince to come over on Saturday.

 

On that Saturday we had a nice afternoon just sitting and chatting for a few hours. That evening I messaged her telling her that I thought we got on too well and she agreed. I told her that I wanted us to go out and she agreed. She at this point, we were in a relationship. This is two and a half weeks ago.

 

The next Friday, my parents were away, so she came round, we had sex and we slept in the same bed together. It was a really enjoyable night and she was the first one to say that.

 

She was going to a party the next night that wasn't really a massive event. I worried quite a bit that she'd talk to other guys and something might happen, but didn't really believe it would.

 

We met then last week on Wednesday and Thursday and had a decent time together. We said we going to go to the nearest town on Monday and go shopping, as it was the holiday.

 

On Sunday night, however, she tells me that she doesn't think we should go because she kissed someone at that party. It hurt me, obviously, but I didn't think it was the end of the world because I loved her and could forgive her, especially as I know what she's like drunk. She said however that she thought it showed something about how she must feel towards me that it was so easy for her to do that.

 

I called her and we spoke for 25 minutes. She said she didn't know whether she loved me. I told her I did and it didn't bother me that much that she had done what she did, especially as she didn't even care about him.

 

However, I had noticed that she'd been messaging her ex and another male friend on Snapchat during the time that she was seeing me before we went out. When I mentioned it a couple of times, she kept saying they had been messaging her and that she hadn't been responding. I asked her about it on the phone and she told me that she'd still been messaging them when we'd been seeing each other and she had met up with and kissed the male friend, even if she saw them as friends. We agreed to meet and talk about it on Monday.

 

We met on Monday and went for a nice walk, where we talked things over. I told her that it didn't matter that much to me because I loved her too much. I said she could still meet up with the male friend if she needed to, but that of course it wasn't fine to be kissing and seeing him romantically. She said she still didn't know what she wanted to do.

 

We talked that night on the phone when she was still indecisive. But she suggested I ring her again on Tuesday night. We talked for a long time on Tuesday, but she still didn't know what she wanted. When I said "I love you" when saying goodbye, however, she said "I love you too". This gave me a lot of confidence because she could have just said "yeah, me too" and it wouldn't have meant anywhere near as much. We agreed to meet on Thursday.

 

So this morning, I ask her when she wants to meet and she tells me she has too much work to do. Considering how up for it she sounded only on Tuesday, this seems like a complete lie.

 

I feel like she thinks she shouldn't love me because she was so easily able to kiss that guy, but that deep down she still does. What should I do? Letting go isn't an option for me at the moment. I'll know when it's the right time for that.

 

Thanks for reading through all of that.

[Telemachus]

You may have needed to include all the details, but I read your posting, and they aren't essential to the story of a teen romance that has run its course, or is running its course.

 

Needing to work is a good reason for not doing something else. Jealousy is not healthy. Love is eternal, for as long as it lasts.

[d0nnivain]

You two have been using each other for sex for a while now. There is no real caring on your part, although you have been polite throughout. You have considered stopping things with her but now you are out of sorts because she is the one who actually ended things. That's not fair. You don't really want her back. Your ego is bruised.

 

 

It was fun while it lasted. It's over.

 

 

Next time do try to actually care about the girls you sleep with.

[Goodguy05]

Hi there,

 

This is going to be ultra long but I felt the need to explain everything in full to give you the full picture.

 

I met this girl (17, same as me at the time, but she was a school year younger) at the start of November who I knew of and thought she was decent but talked to her for the first time and started dancing with her at an event. She seemed to really like me. We started to message all the time on Messenger. We met a couple more times in November for coffee.

 

I got invited to a party and got her in as my +1. At this party we got drunk and kissed a lot and did a few extra things. She said she had a free house on Monday and asked whether I wanted to come round. We had sex which I found alright, but at the time seeing her naked disappointed me a bit. I was still very happy to see her though and in December we met up a few times again. Unfortunately at least one of her parents were always in and she always worked for like the whole weekend. Opportunities for sex or meeting at all were quite rare.

 

Mid way through January she told me she had a free house and we were going to have sex. Unfortunately it fell on her period and she only ended up giving me a hand job, which was nice, but after that I felt really low about her and was sort of not wanting to see her anymore.

 

My hands became tied however when she invited me to this dinner in mid-March only a week or so later. I felt obliged to go not to embarrass her, even if I knew barely anyone going well enough to talk to them and hadn't ever spoken to her friends.

 

We then didn't meet for a couple of weeks, but when I did see her, my interest in her came alive again and I really started to love her for her personality.

 

We were meant to be going to a party again at the start of March, but it got called off at the last minute, so we ended up going out and just walking through town. We kissed a few times and it was just nice to spend that time with her.

 

I had the idea then to book us into a hotel the week after, but we found out that one of us had to be 18, and I wasn't until the week after. Luckily she had a free house a few days after anyway and we had sex which I enjoyed more than before.

 

We went to the dinner on the Friday, which was slightly awkward but not terrible. I met her parents that night and she met mine, even if they didn't know how close we really were.

 

The week after, I asked to meet up after school, but she told me she couldn't at the last minute. Later I found out that while we were at school she had messaged me telling me that she wasn't feeling it anymore, she didn't feel it was going anywhere and that she didn't want the extra stress of us. She seemed pretty adamant, but I managed to convince to come over on Saturday.

 

On that Saturday we had a nice afternoon just sitting and chatting for a few hours. That evening I messaged her telling her that I thought we got on too well and she agreed. I told her that I wanted us to go out and she agreed. She at this point, we were in a relationship. This is two and a half weeks ago.

 

The next Friday, my parents were away, so she came round, we had sex and we slept in the same bed together. It was a really enjoyable night and she was the first one to say that.

 

She was going to a party the next night that wasn't really a massive event. I worried quite a bit that she'd talk to other guys and something might happen, but didn't really believe it would.

 

We met then last week on Wednesday and Thursday and had a decent time together. We said we going to go to the nearest town on Monday and go shopping, as it was the holiday.

 

On Sunday night, however, she tells me that she doesn't think we should go because she kissed someone at that party. It hurt me, obviously, but I didn't think it was the end of the world because I loved her and could forgive her, especially as I know what she's like drunk. She said however that she thought it showed something about how she must feel towards me that it was so easy for her to do that.

 

I called her and we spoke for 25 minutes. She said she didn't know whether she loved me. I told her I did and it didn't bother me that much that she had done what she did, especially as she didn't even care about him.

 

However, I had noticed that she'd been messaging her ex and another male friend on Snapchat during the time that she was seeing me before we went out. When I mentioned it a couple of times, she kept saying they had been messaging her and that she hadn't been responding. I asked her about it on the phone and she told me that she'd still been messaging them when we'd been seeing each other and she had met up with and kissed the male friend, even if she saw them as friends. We agreed to meet and talk about it on Monday.

 

We met on Monday and went for a nice walk, where we talked things over. I told her that it didn't matter that much to me because I loved her too much. I said she could still meet up with the male friend if she needed to, but that of course it wasn't fine to be kissing and seeing him romantically. She said she still didn't know what she wanted to do.

 

We talked that night on the phone when she was still indecisive. But she suggested I ring her again on Tuesday night. We talked for a long time on Tuesday, but she still didn't know what she wanted. When I said "I love you" when saying goodbye, however, she said "I love you too". This gave me a lot of confidence because she could have just said "yeah, me too" and it wouldn't have meant anywhere near as much. We agreed to meet on Thursday.

 

So this morning, I ask her when she wants to meet and she tells me she has too much work to do. Considering how up for it she sounded only on Tuesday, this seems like a complete lie.

 

I feel like she thinks she shouldn't love me because she was so easily able to kiss that guy, but that deep down she still does. What should I do? Letting go isn't an option for me at the moment. I'll know when it's the right time for that.

 

Thanks for reading through all of that.

 

Just let her be for now wait til she contacts u. Simple as that.