I want your thoughts on this

[Happines95]

We broke up 7 months ago, 5 months of no contact. She dumped me, she told me she didn't love me anymore.

 

 

Hey,

 

I have been doubting for weeks now if I should sent this letter to you or not. I guess I have been waiting for the right moment to do so but I realized there's never going to be such a moment. When you broke up with me I was really hurt and mad, it felt like I lost everything. When I look back at it now i realize that you breaking up with me was the best for the both of us.Somewhere during our relationship I lost myself... The last weeks, maybe even the last months, of our relationship I was making myself unhappy and I was making you unhappy. I should thank you for breaking up with me because by doing so I found myself back again.

 

I have accepted that we aren't a couple anymore, it's for the best, we just don't work together. The only thing I regret is that I ruined our friendship with the way I acted when we broke up. I said things out of anger and hurt that I shouldn't have said and that I didn't mean. I'm not proud of it and I wish I could take all those words back but the only thing I can do is say that I'm sorry. I acted like an idiot, but when you really love someone you sometimes lose yourself in that feeling. I could pretend that I don't miss you and that I don't think about you but to be honest there hasn't been a day that I haven't thought about you. I still miss you as my bestfriend every single day. It's hard to accept that you don't want anything to do with me, but I respect your choice. I only want you to be happy and if that means that we never speak to each other again so be it. Maybe this is for the betterr, I don’t know. But what I do know is that I’m extremely grateful that are paths crossed, even if it was for just a moment.

 

I hope everything is going well at college, I don't doubt it you are a great person. I also want to wish you a belated happy birthday, I didn't sent you anything because maybe you would have taken it the wrong way. I'm never going to forget our time together, it was the most beautiful time of my life so far and it gave me a lot of good memories.

 

I want you to know that I'm always going to be there for you no matter what happened between us. I have always loved you with all my heart and although we aren't a part of each other's lives anymore I'm always going to care about you and a part of me will always love you.

 

Thank you for being my first love and my best friend.

[Jagged100]

Why did you decide to send this now?

[frigginlost]

Don't send that letter...

[Happines95]

Why did you decide to send this now?

 

I haven't sent it yet but I probably will. It just keeps going through my mind.

[keiji]

Before sending it, ask yourself if you're expecting a reaction, perhaps even her wanting to give it one more try, and answer very, very honestly. If you're just planning to contact her out of a healthy affection, go ahead. If consciously or subconsciously you think this will be your last chance, I'm quite sure it will not turn out as you expect.

[backandforth]

Don't send that letter...

 

Seconded. Let the past be the past. She'll perceive you as totally weak, if she doesn't already.

[Happines95]

Before sending it, ask yourself if you're expecting a reaction, perhaps even her wanting to give it one more try, and answer very, very honestly. If you're just planning to contact her out of a healthy affection, go ahead. If consciously or subconsciously you think this will be your last chance, I'm quite sure it will not turn out as you expect.

 

I don't expect anything, I don't want to get back togehter with her. It's just that I have been running into her these past few weeks at college but she never dares to look straight in my eyes when we pass each other, she smiles at me but... I just have the feeling she still thinks am mad at her.

[Mumbles]

Its a begging letter.

 

Its common enough to have these feelings, but as another poster has already said, what are you hoping to gain? Really? No bull**** to us here as we're all friends and anonymous anyway.

 

Your first love will always be your first love ... you'll never forget her, just as no-one ever forgets their first sexual experience. The letter isn't a bad one, its how you feel inside and even 50 years later you'll likely still harbour that same warm glow towards this girl, this first love - but, at the same time, let it go.

 

Feel you feelings, sure, but there isn't anything to be gained in sending something like this to an ex love.

 

Now, if what you are really trying to do here is pursue her again, well, man up and do it honestly and confidently, don't beg.

[Happines95]

Its a begging letter.

 

Its common enough to have these feelings, but as another poster has already said, what are you hoping to gain? Really? No bull**** to us here as we're all friends and anonymous anyway.

 

Your first love will always be your first love ... you'll never forget her, just as no-one ever forgets their first sexual experience. The letter isn't a bad one, its how you feel inside and even 50 years later you'll likely still harbour that same warm glow towards this girl, this first love - but, at the same time, let it go.

 

Feel you feelings, sure, but there isn't anything to be gained in sending something like this to an ex love.

 

Now, if what you are really trying to do here is pursue her again, well, man up and do it honestly and confidently, don't beg.

 

I don't want to get back together with her. A year ago she was pregnant with my child but she didn't want it so she did an abortion and know everytime we ran into each other at college she pretends I don't exist. And this week a friend of her told me she's been having health problems and is going to switch subject at college next year and I just want her to know that even after everything that happened between us I will always be there for her.

[Mumbles]

I don't want to get back together with her. A year ago she was pregnant with my child but she didn't want it so she did an abortion and know everytime we ran into each other at college she pretends I don't exist.

 

You're both just awkward. Let it be. You're young and lots of water has gone under this bridge from the look of it.

 

When you see her, just give her the nod of acknowledgement, the one that says, I see you, but can't interact with you, and move on.

 

And this week a friend of her told me she's been having health problems and is going to switch subject at college next year and I just want her to know that even after everything that happened between us I will always be there for her.

 

Yes sure, its a heartfelt thing I'm sure - but just don't go there. If the shyte really hits the fan for her, and there is literally no-one she can turn to, well, she'll look you up, have no doubt. She surely doesn't need your permission for this.

 

On the other hand, its a promise that lots of us feel, particularly in young romance, but can't be kept over the long term. You'll find someone else at some point in your life, and that someone else will have _very_ strong feelings about "you always being there" for an old girlfriend, even if by then its a 30 years ago girlfriend.

 

Its simply best left unsaid. These words are typically used to signal that your heart is open, forever, waiting for her return ... its a statement of unrequited love really.