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Dumped by my ex, why is she texting me, and trying to upset me?


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lostboyfriend

Hi all, in need of any advice as I'm stuck and unsure what to think/do at the moment.

 

I'm 20, my ex is 18, we had been together for 3 years. We are each others first love and relationship.

 

Last Monday she broke up with me, her reasoning was that we had been arguing too much recently and the stress was effecting her upcoming final exams (which will be in April/May, she needs very good grades to get into her chosen University).

 

The 'arguments' had not been big - more disagreements over us going out clubbing individually with friends and the other getting jealous. In the last 3 weekends of our relationship we argued 3 times, once each weekend. This 3rd weekend she decided to end things.

 

We had a lovely relationship, our families got on very well and we did everything together. Our bond was very deep so I am very hurt that we are now apart.

 

I feel her reason for breaking up was weak, and I am also hurt that she is seemingly not fighting for us or attempting to work things out - However, maybe the stress of exams really is taking it out of her?

 

Do you guys think there is any other possible reason for her ending things? I have horrible thoughts that there may be someone else in the picture.

 

Since the breakup she has text me a few times as has her mum (My ex apologising saying she needs to think about things, is stressed with exams and will always love me, and her mum saying that she is stressing with her exams and she hopes we can work things out). I have gone No contact with my ex since the breakup night and have blocked her social media as it was upsetting to see her having a good time with friends.

 

My ex text me yesterday morning asking to meet up so that we could speak, I declined as this would set me back, simply replying that 'we are broken up so there isn't anything to speak about'.

 

Her reply "That's fine. I just wanted to talk face to face so that we could end things civil. See you around"

 

She replied something which has really cut deep, I'm not sure if she is just hurting / sad that I've employed no contact / hurt that I haven't chased her.

 

I find it very weird that she would even text me since she was the one who dumped me - surely if she wanted to end things (and did end things) it is better for her if we don't speak. So I don't understand why she has text me 3 times since the breakup.

 

Thoughts?

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She's texting you purely to alleviate her own guilt and to also ensure that you are not moving on. She wants to keep you on the backburner.

 

Notice how she replied with 'she just wanted to end things civilly' when she didn't get what she wanted she lashed out at you with a hurtful message after.

 

She doesn't have your interests at heart only her own. Perhaps she was going to suggest you two can be 'friends' and hangout (backburner).

 

I'd keep NC if I was you until / if she is able to say she made a mistake and wants you back.

 

She's already trying to string you along hence the suggestion to meet up and talk. She wants everything on her terms. Don't be doormat do not answer her anymore. She'll probably dropcyo a few other suggestive breadcrumbs in the coming days. Brewadcrumbs that are meant to confuse you or to sort of imply she 'might' want you back. I.e I miss you. I still think about you. Even I love you still. Don't fall for it.

 

Stay NC until she clearly communicates that she made a mistake. In the meantime take steps to move on. Go out and see friends. Do your own thing.

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I agree. She's feeling guilty and since you blocked her on all social media, she has no idea where your head is at. But, if you blocked her because you don't want to continue to see her out having fun with her friends, she obviously can't be THAT stressed about exams.

 

She was looking for a "closure" meet up. This are so stupid and I NEVER recommend these. Especially when an Ex requests it. Basically, it a time for you two to get together and have her remind you of the reasons why she doesn't want to be with you. Basically, it would be you sitting there and having her tell you of what YOU did wrong in the relationship or what YOU didn't do. Basically to ease her guilt and justify the breakup in her head at your expense. Meanwhile, you leave this "closure" meet up feeling absolutely destroyed. So, good for you for not taking the bait. And did you also notice that she said that she wanted to end this relationship "civilly"? I take it that things were said in the heat of the moment. One thing about most girls is they can't stand the fact that there might be a person on the planet that hates them or doesn't think that they are a nice person.

 

So, she wanted to end things "civilly" so she can say to herself, "Oh look! I'm not mad and he's not mad. I guess the breakup was for the best after all!" She just wants to ease her guilt.

 

Hang in there.

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Oh yes, her response about "wanting to end things civilly" is filled with pain and selfishness. It is definitely a 'lash back' message because the NC is denying her power and she wants power over you in the breakup. You are showing strength, probably surprising her a lot since she thinks you are weak (which is likely one of the secret reasons she dumped you), and she in uneasy that you are moving on so well while she is drowning in guilt. And she's definitely feeling insecure because you are denying her any power- its killing her and you can sense that in her response.

 

Dont give her the satisfaction of relieving that guilt and getting the power. To be honest, leaving with all the power like you have right now puts you in thr best possible position for her coming back down the line.

 

Ignore her completely and move on. She will probably crack down the line, but for now let her handle that guilt on her own and let her feel the loss of you completely.

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Guilt.She feels bad and wants to basically tell you that.

Don't waste your time because in essense she doesn't feel too bad-she just wants to smooth things over.

I had an ex text me trying to tell me how much she cared for me etc even though she had cheated on me. That's when I learned the hard way that you really do need to go FULL NC. She shouldn't have the ability to text you but you left the door open. If you go NC you won't be bothered with the BS texts which like I said is all for her benefit not yours. Because all you'll end up doing is trying to figure out the meaning of the text or become stuck on waiting for her texts. Either way neither is good for YOU.

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lostboyfriend
She's texting you purely to alleviate her own guilt and to also ensure that you are not moving on. She wants to keep you on the backburner.

 

Notice how she replied with 'she just wanted to end things civilly' when she didn't get what she wanted she lashed out at you with a hurtful message after.

 

She doesn't have your interests at heart only her own. Perhaps she was going to suggest you two can be 'friends' and hangout (backburner).

 

I'd keep NC if I was you until / if she is able to say she made a mistake and wants you back.

 

She's already trying to string you along hence the suggestion to meet up and talk. She wants everything on her terms. Don't be doormat do not answer her anymore. She'll probably dropcyo a few other suggestive breadcrumbs in the coming days. Brewadcrumbs that are meant to confuse you or to sort of imply she 'might' want you back. I.e I miss you. I still think about you. Even I love you still. Don't fall for it.

 

Stay NC until she clearly communicates that she made a mistake. In the meantime take steps to move on. Go out and see friends. Do your own thing.

 

 

Thank you so much for taking the time to reply.

 

What hurts even more is that for Christmas we arranged a Spa weekend together for Valentines Day! Only a few days away now!

 

I have arranged to take a friend with me to the Spa day, as thought it would be a shame and waste to not go. I'd also just be sat at home thinking about not going and having a nice time with her - so hopefully me and my pal can make the most of it!

 

I will stick to NC - and see if I hear anything from her. However, I do feel like sending one final message to communicate that I'm not happy to see her or be friends, because that's not what I want and it will not help me move on.

 

Do you think there is any point in communicating that last bit with her? All of my peers at work and home think that the final message will give me closure as well as stop her 'doormat' mentality of thinking she can keep me around.

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lostboyfriend
I agree. She's feeling guilty and since you blocked her on all social media, she has no idea where your head is at. But, if you blocked her because you don't want to continue to see her out having fun with her friends, she obviously can't be THAT stressed about exams.

 

She was looking for a "closure" meet up. This are so stupid and I NEVER recommend these. Especially when an Ex requests it. Basically, it a time for you two to get together and have her remind you of the reasons why she doesn't want to be with you. Basically, it would be you sitting there and having her tell you of what YOU did wrong in the relationship or what YOU didn't do. Basically to ease her guilt and justify the breakup in her head at your expense. Meanwhile, you leave this "closure" meet up feeling absolutely destroyed. So, good for you for not taking the bait. And did you also notice that she said that she wanted to end this relationship "civilly"? I take it that things were said in the heat of the moment. One thing about most girls is they can't stand the fact that there might be a person on the planet that hates them or doesn't think that they are a nice person.

 

So, she wanted to end things "civilly" so she can say to herself, "Oh look! I'm not mad and he's not mad. I guess the breakup was for the best after all!" She just wants to ease her guilt.

 

Hang in there.

 

 

Hi Chi Town, nothing was said in the heat of the moment on my part - but as you say it is probably her hoping to iron things out and not look the 'bad guy', as she has essentially dumped me over nothing.

 

As you say, this going out and partying on weekends with friends is really strange, as her reason for breaking up was stress caused by our arguing and her exams - obviously I understand she needs time with friends, however partying all the time isn't going to help her emotionally or with the exam stress.

 

Possibly she is just immature?

 

I really cannot understand this, as 3 years of a lovely relationship, is seemingly being thrown away by her.

 

I explicitly asked her on the evening we broke up - "is there any other reason you aren't telling me?" she kept refuting this, and her mum also text me saying that the last thing on her mind was other guys (she is very close with her mum).

 

I simply blocked her as seeing her pictures and tweets don't help with the grieving process. I was planning on a total NC but felt I should reply to the 3rd text as I felt rude (also had a slight hope that she may want to reconcile).

 

So after all of that, do you think I should reply to this 'See you around' text?

 

I was thinking of replying with a clear message that I can't be friends with her as that isn't how I feel, I still love her and will always treasure the memories we have.

 

I feel like this would help bring closure for me as personally I will know that I've done all I can to try and salvage and save things with her.

 

Hopefully you agree

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lostboyfriend
Oh yes, her response about "wanting to end things civilly" is filled with pain and selfishness. It is definitely a 'lash back' message because the NC is denying her power and she wants power over you in the breakup. You are showing strength, probably surprising her a lot since she thinks you are weak (which is likely one of the secret reasons she dumped you), and she in uneasy that you are moving on so well while she is drowning in guilt. And she's definitely feeling insecure because you are denying her any power- its killing her and you can sense that in her response.

 

Dont give her the satisfaction of relieving that guilt and getting the power. To be honest, leaving with all the power like you have right now puts you in thr best possible position for her coming back down the line.

 

Ignore her completely and move on. She will probably crack down the line, but for now let her handle that guilt on her own and let her feel the loss of you completely.

 

 

Thank you Jamili, keeping to the NC and blocking her wasn't as hard as expected. It helped me to heal a little bit, and also allowed me to slightly move on - until her texts came through anyway.

 

So following my other responses, you would suggest to stick to NC?

 

I was feeling like replying to the 'See you around' text as I have suggested in my other posts.

 

I understand that this does slightly hand the power back to her, but I don't want her to mistake my NC for me wanting to move on. I would love to speak with her and sort things out and if I could some way communicate this to her but at the same time say that I'm not here to be picked up and dropped.

 

I understand it's a tough one, and would appreciate anything you have to say on the matter - even if you think I'm being completely wet about the whole situation!

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lostboyfriend
Guilt.She feels bad and wants to basically tell you that.

Don't waste your time because in essense she doesn't feel too bad-she just wants to smooth things over.

I had an ex text me trying to tell me how much she cared for me etc even though she had cheated on me. That's when I learned the hard way that you really do need to go FULL NC. She shouldn't have the ability to text you but you left the door open. If you go NC you won't be bothered with the BS texts which like I said is all for her benefit not yours. Because all you'll end up doing is trying to figure out the meaning of the text or become stuck on waiting for her texts. Either way neither is good for YOU.

 

Hi Been, I appreciate the thoughts.

 

The only reason I have left the lines of communication open are because I love this girl with all of my heart. Being young, we have grown up together, and this means that I feel a really strong connection with her.

 

Maybe she has just lost that feeling? I certainly would never treat her this way.

 

I'm slightly confused but as you say, I'm back to NC now, and will wait to hear from you guys on this thread whether you think a response to the 'See you around' text is worth it.

 

If I reply it will be short, just communicating to her that I still love her and do not want to be friends.

 

How could I communicate this to her without coming across as a doormat?

 

Trouble is, sticking to NC may make her get the impression that I don't want her.

 

While I don't want to be stuck chasing her, at the same time, I don't want there to be any misunderstanding that I want to work things out with her.

 

If she doesn't want to reconcile I have absolutely no trouble going NC, continuing to block her on all social media, and moving on. I feel like I was halfway there, in a good headspace, but the text from her made me think that she could want to talk about the possibility of getting back together.

 

But, judging by her response to my last text I guess this is not the case?

 

Could she have possibly just lashed out that I didn't want to meet her, and if I leave it a while she may contact me again?

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Pumpingiron34

Na man, listen to these folks on here. You will be so much happier that you did even though you can't see it yet. NC as hard as possible until she literally breaks down if that's what you really want and she will. These girls who get bored in ltrs I'm starting to feel are wired the same way. Every story is the same. Yea there is probably another guy in her head at least. Harry Houdini the best that you can and vanish. It seems counter productive but, it is absolutely not at all. Woman love to be chased don't do it

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Pumpingiron34

And nothing for nothing me and my ex grew up together to. I met her she was 16 and I was 17 lasted untill she was 21 and I was 22. I loved the soul out of her and she meat grounded my heart to shreds. Don't make all the mistakes that I did. Every time I contacted her caused so much pain in my life and made me realize had I just stayed NC from day one I would of been a billion times better off.

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Hi all, in need of any advice as I'm stuck and unsure what to think/do at the moment.

 

I'm 20, my ex is 18, we had been together for 3 years. We are each others first love and relationship.

 

Last Monday she broke up with me, her reasoning was that we had been arguing too much recently and the stress was effecting her upcoming final exams (which will be in April/May, she needs very good grades to get into her chosen University).

 

The 'arguments' had not been big - more disagreements over us going out clubbing individually with friends and the other getting jealous. In the last 3 weekends of our relationship we argued 3 times, once each weekend. This 3rd weekend she decided to end things.

 

Red flag. Who is doing what to cause jealousy? Me thinks your GF has possibly found another.

 

We had a lovely relationship, our families got on very well and we did everything together. Our bond was very deep so I am very hurt that we are now apart.

 

I feel her reason for breaking up was weak, and I am also hurt that she is seemingly not fighting for us or attempting to work things out - However, maybe the stress of exams really is taking it out of her?

 

It was the best she could come up with other then...I want to test the waters.

 

Do you guys think there is any other possible reason for her ending things? I have horrible thoughts that there may be someone else in the picture.

 

Trust your gut bro. It never lies.

 

Since the breakup she has text me a few times as has her mum (My ex apologising saying she needs to think about things, is stressed with exams and will always love me, and her mum saying that she is stressing with her exams and she hopes we can work things out). I have gone No contact with my ex since the breakup night and have blocked her social media as it was upsetting to see her having a good time with friends.

 

Your sir are plan B. If the new OM plan A does not work out. Your are the fall back plan B. Do not be a doormat.

 

My ex text me yesterday morning asking to meet up so that we could speak, I declined as this would set me back, simply replying that 'we are broken up so there isn't anything to speak about'.

 

Good response. Detach and hard 180. Do not be strung along as your GF tests the waters.

 

Her reply "That's fine. I just wanted to talk face to face so that we could end things civil. See you around"

 

This eases her mind and gets her OFF the hook. See, in her mine she TRIED to make it civil but YOU were not having it. It is ok for her to go see Johnny.

 

She replied something which has really cut deep, I'm not sure if she is just hurting / sad that I've employed no contact / hurt that I haven't chased her.

 

I find it very weird that she would even text me since she was the one who dumped me - surely if she wanted to end things (and did end things) it is better for her if we don't speak. So I don't understand why she has text me 3 times since the breakup.

 

Thoughts?

 

Dude, trust your gut.

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So after all of that, do you think I should reply to this 'See you around' text?

 

I was thinking of replying with a clear message that I can't be friends with her as that isn't how I feel, I still love her and will always treasure the memories we have.

 

I feel like this would help bring closure for me as personally I will know that I've done all I can to try and salvage and save things with her.

 

Hopefully you agree

 

 

Dude, she broke up with you. You owe her nothing!

 

Think of the relationship as a job. She basically fired you. She told you that your services as boyfriend are no longer required. So, when you get fired from a real job, do you show up on Monday and start working for free? NO!

 

You dust off that resume and you go looking for the next job and you don't look back.

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Thank you Jamili, keeping to the NC and blocking her wasn't as hard as expected. It helped me to heal a little bit, and also allowed me to slightly move on - until her texts came through anyway.

 

So following my other responses, you would suggest to stick to NC?

 

I was feeling like replying to the 'See you around' text as I have suggested in my other posts.

 

I understand that this does slightly hand the power back to her, but I don't want her to mistake my NC for me wanting to move on. I would love to speak with her and sort things out and if I could some way communicate this to her but at the same time say that I'm not here to be picked up and dropped.

 

I understand it's a tough one, and would appreciate anything you have to say on the matter - even if you think I'm being completely wet about the whole situation!

 

Don't reply to the "see you around text"! Do not do it (if you want her to possibly come back someday). As I said you currently hold all the power right now, you want to be as stoic as possible. She wants you to crack, and chase her, or tell her you love her, or miss her, or beg and plead and break down - so she can walk away a happy person and be glad she left you for the sad sap that you are. This sounds harsh, and please understand she's not thinking this consciously, it's subconscious, and she's not doing it maliciously, it's biology. She wants to find a stronger mate and thinks you are weak. She subconsciously wants you to prove to her that you are weak, and thus react like a weak puppy, so she can confirm within herself that she made the right decision.

 

What you need to do is display just how much of a strong, valuable and confident man you are - and to do that I highly suggest you DO NOT REPLY.

 

I know being the "doormat"/backup plan/friend might seem logical to an extent - but understand that once a woman sees you as a doormat, it will be damn near impossible to gain her respect, love and attraction back. Right now, even though she dumped you, she still has some attraction and respect for you - and that will GROW in time if you keep NC and disappear. If you stay in contact and "be nice" and reply to that snarky message, you are going to lose power, lose her attraction, and she will see you as a weaker guy; which = less chance of her coming back.

 

You are starting off on the right foot here - you have basically all the power, you didn't beg/plead/cry, etc. or any of the other mistakes that push ex girlfriends away. You now need to vanish out of her life ASAP like a ninja, and let her stew in her loss. She must feel the deep, shocking realization that you are GONE from her life FOREVER, if there is to be any chance of her returning. She must think she blew it with a really strong, confident and rare man FOREVER, if she doesn't try her a** off to get you back- which I believe will come in time.

 

Keep in mind, yes she is immature. Hell, she's 18! She's a kid lol. Those first relationships between kids rarely last. But, if you do want any chance of her possibly someday reconciling, as counter-intuitive as it might seem logically - you MUST vanish, and do NOT respond to that text.

Keep us updated, and good luck!

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Your reply will simply open the doors of communication that you say you want to be shut.

 

I understand the urge. You're hurt, you'd rather the relationship didn't end and you want her to know that for sure, just in case she's somehow misunderstood your silence. You want her to know that this can be salvaged, if she's willing.

 

I want you to know something before you contact her.

 

As someone who has been a dumper many times before, I can tell you for sure, she understands you're hurt. She has no illusions that you might simply be stubborn and angry or that she unwittingly granted your secret wish to get rid of her. She knows, and she's going to do whatever she has in mind based on that.

 

If you're going to send a reply, it should be something along these lines:

 

I've been reconsidering your request to meet. I understand why you want to talk, but having thought a lot about it, what is there to say? That we don't hate each other? That we're sorry it ended in anger? That it was great while it lasted, but now it's not? I know all that already. I don't need to hear it and I don't need say it, because I know you know all that too.

 

Here's the one thing you might not know. I need space and time so I can get over you. I expect you to give it to me. When I don't give a damn, that's when you'll hear from me again and not a minute sooner. Until then, good luck and Godspeed. I know you wish me the same. No hard feelings.

Notice that there's no declaration of love or tribute paid to the glory of your relationship. That's because at this point in time, every reassurance you give tells her she's lost nothing. That little blurb up above puts her on notice that she's driven you away. If you want her back, that is the only idea that will bring her back. There's no guarantee she will want you back, but she has to feel she's lost something before she can want it back.

 

It's better for you to send nothing. But if you're going to send something, then send something like what I've suggested. Don't send her what's on your heart.

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^I always think of this when I think of the proper approach when dealing with breakups :laugh:

 

If you want them back, you must do the opposite of what your instincts want you to do ;)

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lostboyfriend

Big developments overnight everyone. Would love to hear your thoughts on a crazy 24hours.

 

Simple story, so bare with the explanation below.

 

I have kept NC with my ex and did not reply to the 'See you around' text.

 

I have blocked her on all social media, however my sister hasn't. Yesterday while at college one of my ex's friends filmed her singing about being single (while wearing one of my hoodies WTF).

 

I hadn't seen this or had any knowledge of it - even if I did I would've put it down to girls being immature and showing off in front of her friends. My sister however was very angry. She proceeded to message my ex 'That video is an embarrassment and is making a mockery of the you being part of our family for the last 3 years'.

 

My ex did not reply to this message. However her brother then asked my sister to stop messaging my ex, my sister responded by asking for her to stop being so immature and that as she had broken up with me she should bring all of my hoodies back.

 

Later that evening I received a phone-call from her mother. I didn't want to answer however my sister and parents encouraged me to. After answering I was on the receiving end of a 25 minute tirade.

 

She accused me of being manipulative by using NC on her daughter - and declining to meet her upon her request on Wednesday. She also mentioned the Spa day that I have booked for Valentines Day - I'm guessing that she was thereby hinting that her daughter (my ex) actually still wanted to come! What a complete mind ***k.

 

I tried to reply stating that I was the one who has been dumped , she had asked for time and space which is what I have been giving her with the NC, and I cannot be played/picked up and dropped by her daughter as it's unfair on me. I stated I did not meet her as I didn't want to get dumped for a 'second time', as this would only upset me again.

 

She continued with her tirade and said a lot of hurtful things bringing up past small issues that me and my ex had put behind us (some issues from up to two years ago!). I ended to phone call by stating my piece - that I am the victim of the manipulation and all I was doing is giving her the time and space she requested when she finished with me.

 

.... on to this morning, and her mother has proceed to come to my house, bringing my clothes, and taking back the hurtful things she said to me on the phone.

 

Her mum then messaged me saying she won't contact me again and finished her message saying that her daughter is very upset that things have worked out like this...

 

All in all, I am still in NC, despite all of the drama I have not contacted my ex and she has not contacted me.

 

What do you guys perceive to be the best course of action?

 

I am still deeply in love with my ex, and want her back. I'm just not sure after families getting involved that we could ever rebuild the bridges. Unless she comes around to reconcile and gives a huge apology for everything, admitting she has caused all of this.

 

For now I will stick to NC for my own sanity.

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This has all the ingredients for a drama free relationship.

 

You will do what you think is best, but might do you good to cut and run.

 

And lets be clear, you are not NC.

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I tried to reply stating that I was the one who has been dumped , she had asked for time and space which is what I have been giving her with the NC, and I cannot be played/picked up and dropped by her daughter as it's unfair on me. I stated I did not meet her as I didn't want to get dumped for a 'second time', as this would only upset me again.

 

You have respect for yourself and took a stand. Excellent and good for you!

 

She continued with her tirade and said a lot of hurtful things bringing up past small issues that me and my ex had put behind us (some issues from up to two years ago!). I ended to phone call by stating my piece - that I am the victim of the manipulation and all I was doing is giving her the time and space she requested when she finished with me.

 

Great...mom has revisionist history of every little bit of crap? Glad she was keeping notes and a score card. Deal is...you ain't dating the mom. She can keep that to herself.

 

.... on to this morning, and her mother has proceed to come to my house, bringing my clothes, and taking back the hurtful things she said to me on the phone.

 

Damn well she should.

 

Her mum then messaged me saying she won't contact me again and finished her message saying that her daughter is very upset that things have worked out like this...

 

Nice little qualifier that her daughter is hurt. WTH, did she not catch her daughter dropped you like a bad habit. Her mother cares little for you feeling in the matter. But, families usually do circle the wagons for their family members.

 

All in all, I am still in NC, despite all of the drama I have not contacted my ex and she has not contacted me.

 

I would remain in NC. Find a new GF. You deserve better.

 

What do you guys perceive to be the best course of action?

 

Cut and run, sir!

 

I am still deeply in love with my ex, and want her back. I'm just not sure after families getting involved that we could ever rebuild the bridges. Unless she comes around to reconcile and gives a huge apology for everything, admitting she has caused all of this.

 

Don't hold your breath on an apology. Her mom is on the case now. You are a snake who is uncaring to her daughter. She will spoon feed that to your XGF. Cut and run sir.

 

For now I will stick to NC for my own sanity. Excellent idea! And don't be surprised if another girl suddenly shows interest in you now that you are available. Happens a lot.

 

Best of luck!

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lostboyfriend
This has all the ingredients for a drama free relationship.

 

You will do what you think is best, but might do you good to cut and run.

 

And lets be clear, you are not NC.

 

 

Hi Bromeo, what makes you say that last line? The fact that I answered the phone to her mom?

 

I agree that cut and run may be my best option - with her mother involved I'm worried that sadly things could/will never ever work out. She is clearly very involved and controlling in my ex's life.

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Hi Bromeo, what makes you say that last line? The fact that I answered the phone to her mom?

 

I agree that cut and run may be my best option - with her mother involved I'm worried that sadly things could/will never ever work out. She is clearly very involved and controlling in my ex's life.

 

Yes, you are still in contact. Further, you are not dating mom and do not owe her anymore than what transpired the night before. It appears mom is a pain in the backside. Who needs that additional drama?

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lostboyfriend

Thank you Nailhead! I agree that I do deserve better, bottom line is, I have been dumped and went NC for my sanity. I should not of had the NC thrown back in my face, especially by an over involved mother!!

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Thank you Nailhead! I agree that I do deserve better, bottom line is, I have been dumped and went NC for my sanity. I should not of had the NC thrown back in my face, especially by an over involved mother!!

 

And to be sure, the video of singing about being single or whatever it was, it appears your XGF has been thinking about this for a while. Maybe the relationship is stale. Maybe she just felt like friends only. It takes work from both to keep the relationship alive. The bad part, if that was the case, your XGF should have talked with you about it. If dropping you was her idea of getting you to notice...it was a poor idea at best.

 

You will hurt for awhile. Have unanswered question. It will get better I can guarantee that. Been there and done that myself.

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And to be sure, the video of singing about being single or whatever it was, it appears your XGF has been thinking about this for a while. Maybe the relationship is stale. Maybe she just felt like friends only. It takes work from both to keep the relationship alive. The bad part, if that was the case, your XGF should have talked with you about it. If dropping you was her idea of getting you to notice...it was a poor idea at best.

 

You will hurt for awhile. Have unanswered question. It will get better I can guarantee that. Been there and done that myself.

 

 

Hi Nailhead, it was Celine Deon - All by myself, to be precise

 

Just a complete mindless thing to do, also don't understand why she would be wearing my sweatshirt to college following our breakup!

 

I will completely leave it now, as you said, if this was her attempt to get me to revamp and chase her it has horribly gone wrong.

 

Spa day for me and a friend now anyway!

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Hi Nailhead, it was Celine Deon - All by myself, to be precise

 

 

Singing that was in poor taste sir. She did not give a crap and appeared to be basking in the glow of being rid of you. That should put that in perspective for you. Oh, thank your sis for standing up for you.

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