Not hurt after break up?

[ExclusiveFFA]

(Alot longer than i thought it would be but please read) Hey all well I don't really know how to start this but me and my ex were together for almost 2 years, it was the best time of my life. (Well i thought it was) I was 16 almost 17 and now I'm almost 19. There were upset and downs, she didn't like being kissed, getting cuddled and being close as much as I do. I absolutely crave it, but we've broken up 5 times in the past 2 years, some of the reasons for the break up were 'you're too clingy, I don't know if this is what I want, you don't let me go do things I want to etc etc' but this time we broke up on new years eve, I was absolutely heart broken. I've never felt that way before it was horrible. That lasted for about a week, until I met up with her to see if she wanted to get back with me after her dumping me, I then found out she was flirting with another guy getting close the very night we broke up at a party. I also found out one of her old friends told her he liked her. I asked her what she wanted us to be and she said she wants us to be friends, but still see other people. So I can go to partys and hook up with another girl and come back to her the next day and carry on our friendship. And she wanted to be able to do the same. I thought Oh cool this might work, get the best for both worlds ya know? But the next day after staying at her house I asked if I could stay again that night and she said no, I thought was weird then she had some guy text her saying 'Hey xx' (no idea who he is, or how he got her number) and then after that I seen her texting the guy who liked her, named 'Egg' in her phone. Making plans to go out that night with a few other friends. Of course I got upset at that, and she just told me I'm holding her back from doing what she wants to and I'm emotionally blackmailing her. She got angry because I was upset, she says 'it's with other friends so what's the big deal?' OK so being with other friends makes it all okay??? But anyway it was then that I realised i couldn't be in a relationship like that,so I ended things with her for good. I do feel really bad because she's upset crying and there's nothing I can do about it, but other than that I don't feel anything?? Is that bad? I'm perfectly fine enjoying being single,being able to message who I want, saying what I want, etc. She wasn't a sexual person, didn't really like intercourse. (Maybe twice a month max) and no I'm not one of those guys who would leave a girl because she doesn't "put out" often enough. I tried to give her my all, I would have died to be in a relationship with her and I just feel that it wasn't good enough. I feel good when I think about being with someone else who likes all the attention I give, who appreciates everything I do. But is it bad to think that? I feel I should still be heart broken. Did I make the right decision leaving?

Edited January 18, 2017 by ExclusiveFFA

[ExpatInItaly]

Yes, you absolutely made the right decision. And no, it's not bad that you aren't upset about this.

 

What she suggested is ridiculous and would've ended badly anyway. Breaking up five times, lack of sex and suggesting you both see other people are all huge indicators that you two aren't a good couple.

 

It's time for you both to date other people who are better suited to you.

[SerPundnes]

I tried to give her my all, I would have died to be in a relationship with her and I just feel that it wasn't good enough. I feel good when I think about being with someone else who likes all the attention I give, who appreciates everything I do. But is it bad to think that

 

Don't be with someone who dosen't appriceate who you really are.

You will find yourself a great girl that sees you for who you are, value you and really appriceate all the good things you do for her.

 

Only thing to do: Better youself in any way(s)! Theres allways new stuff to learn about youself.

[xUnknown]

You're probably still in shock a little bit. It may hit you, just be prepared when that happen.

 

Everyone on here will tell you that you made the correct decision, you did. It clearly wasn't working out. Find someone else that wants the same type and amount of attention that you do.

 

I know some friends that can be friends after a breakup, but their relationship is only for a few months, not 2 years like you. It was selfish of her to ask you to remain friends. She wants you around, but not romantically. She cried because you stood up for yourself and she knew you were walking out of her life. Let her feel the loss, same for yourself. That is the only way you'll get closure and move on. Go no contact. If you don't know what that is yet, do a search for it. It hurts, but ultimately for your own good.

 

Good luck and proud of you. The hardest decisions hurt the most. And if I'm wrong and it doesn't come back to hurt you, then you just clarified that you DID make the right decision.