Jump to content

Have you ever thought you were done with an ex, but found interest again?


Recommended Posts

I broke up with my ex 9 months ago. I felt so relieved and happy that I got out of the relationship. I thought I lost love and he loved me a lot but I couldn't support him emotionally anymore. I felt like I was okay with him moving on and there was no chance of me coming back, but after 7 months away, I began to think and wonder how he's been doing, and remembering all of the awesome times. We were together for almost a year, like a normal relationship we would have our ups and downs, but it was still great. I realized how loved he made me feel, and I'm starting to want him back more and more everyday. I just noticed that no contact actually worked, but on me. Has anyone else been through this, you lost all feelings but regained them after a long time? I really improved myself since the break up, and thought I'd find someone new and better. I remember I told him to move on and lose all hope of me coming back...I f**ked up. Tell me if something like this happened to you, whether you were the dumper or the dumpee.

Link to post
Share on other sites

I'm firm in the belief that most people don't leave a relationship which suits them well. I can't help but wonder if you're simply lonely and looking back with rose coloured glasses.

  • Like 1
Link to post
Share on other sites

This post is a dumpee's dream coz they don't come up that often.

 

 

I will follow it with interest haha.

 

 

But I don't whole heartedly agree with Basil. Sure, I agree it more be a case of missing as opposed to genuinely wanting to get back into a relationship but sometimes it takes time and a few other bad relationships to figure out what you had.

 

 

Sometimes in relationships, there were external factors or things that influenced how things went down.

 

 

Sure if both partners were at their best and tried, then no need to try again.

But that isn't likely to always be the case.

 

 

Also, I think you probably know your Ex has likely become stronger and probably toned down his feelings for you. That will no doubt make you feel more attracted towards him.

Edited by marky00
  • Like 7
Link to post
Share on other sites
Simple Logic

Don't it always seem to go

That you don't know what you've got

'Till it's gone

They paved paradise

And put up a parking lot

  • Like 5
Link to post
Share on other sites

Sure if both partners were at their best and tried, then no need to try again.

But that isn't likely to always be the case.

 

Ah, but if one partner doesn't do their best, it shows that they weren't particularly invested in making it work....which is a good reason to not risk them again.

Link to post
Share on other sites
Ah, but if one partner doesn't do their best, it shows that they weren't particularly invested in making it work....which is a good reason to not risk them again.

 

Well maybe,

 

 

But in some of my relationships, where I know I was invested but just didn't have my **** together and needed better coping skills, those are the sorts of relationships I look back on with the thought of wondering if things could have worked out different.

Link to post
Share on other sites
I broke up with my ex 9 months ago. I felt so relieved and happy that I got out of the relationship. I thought I lost love and he loved me a lot but I couldn't support him emotionally anymore. I felt like I was okay with him moving on and there was no chance of me coming back, but after 7 months away, I began to think and wonder how he's been doing, and remembering all of the awesome times. We were together for almost a year, like a normal relationship we would have our ups and downs, but it was still great. I realized how loved he made me feel, and I'm starting to want him back more and more everyday. I just noticed that no contact actually worked, but on me. Has anyone else been through this, you lost all feelings but regained them after a long time? I really improved myself since the break up, and thought I'd find someone new and better. I remember I told him to move on and lose all hope of me coming back...I f**ked up. Tell me if something like this happened to you, whether you were the dumper or the dumpee.

 

So I'll apologize in advance for being so direct here,

 

You thought you'd find someone newer and better but didn't, so now your ex is appealing to you again? Thats not a very good reason for wanting to be with someone you dumped.

 

If someone told me that, I wouldn't be interested.

 

It sounds like you threw away someone too soon. People and relationships aren't like last years iphone, you don't throw them away and a better one comes.

 

Maybe you thought he was being a bit weak by being fully emotionally supportive and available? Now he's gone NC and you're wondering about him, as his ability to walk away shows that he wasn't emotionally dependent on you after all.

Don't think an emotionally supportive man is weak, ensuring your GF feels the love and support you have for her can be very challenging.

 

I'd say lesson learned reach out to him and hope for the best, but I'd ask you first to really check in on yourself first, and ask if he is what you really want. Don't give him a test call or a test meet, that's wasting peoples time. Really make sure you do want him before reaching out. Take some more time if necessary and continue to work on yourself. If he's a strong man, he'll be doing the same.

  • Like 3
Link to post
Share on other sites
This post is a dumpee's dream coz they don't come up that often.

 

 

I've completely walked away from 2 women who ended things with me, and successfully re attracted both of them.

 

The self esteem that self work, NC and walking away gave me enabled me to see that these women were not in a healthy place for an intimate relationship, and I continued to walk on.

 

The whole nightmare of being dumped can be turned into something positive relatively quickly. That takes away most of the fear of being dumped, when you know how to handle it correctly and use a debilitating experience a s a stepping block for better things.

 

That takes way most of the fear of being dumped, allowing relationships to flow a lot more.

 

Slight digression OP, apologies.

  • Like 3
Link to post
Share on other sites
I've completely walked away from 2 women who ended things with me, and successfully re attracted both of them.

 

The self esteem that self work, NC and walking away gave me enabled me to see that these women were not in a healthy place for an intimate relationship, and I continued to walk on.

 

The whole nightmare of being dumped can be turned into something positive relatively quickly. That takes away most of the fear of being dumped, when you know how to handle it correctly and use a debilitating experience a s a stepping block for better things.

 

That takes way most of the fear of being dumped, allowing relationships to flow a lot more.

 

Slight digression OP, apologies.

Hi Fromheart,

 

Please explain! How to turn it into something positive quickly?

I think alot of us would want to know! I've been dumped, but am at the stage where I have decided to move on and not look back. Any tips would be great!

Link to post
Share on other sites

I posted about this today. I ended it with my ex but it was because he treated me like ****. I miss him because I feel lonely.

 

why did you end yours?

Link to post
Share on other sites

Dumper's remorse? Absolutely, numerous times, and in my experience it's far more difficult to win back a dumpee than a dumper.

 

And it's not exactly rocket science to figure out why.

  • Like 1
Link to post
Share on other sites
Hi Fromheart,

 

Please explain! How to turn it into something positive quickly?

I think alot of us would want to know! I've been dumped, but am at the stage where I have decided to move on and not look back. Any tips would be great!

 

Check Corey Wayne, he explains it alot better than I could.

 

It all comes down to looking after yourself whatever stage of relationship you're in.

  • Like 1
Link to post
Share on other sites
I broke up with my ex 9 months ago. I felt so relieved and happy that I got out of the relationship. I thought I lost love and he loved me a lot but I couldn't support him emotionally anymore. I felt like I was okay with him moving on and there was no chance of me coming back, but after 7 months away, I began to think and wonder how he's been doing, and remembering all of the awesome times. We were together for almost a year, like a normal relationship we would have our ups and downs, but it was still great. I realized how loved he made me feel, and I'm starting to want him back more and more everyday. I just noticed that no contact actually worked, but on me. Has anyone else been through this, you lost all feelings but regained them after a long time? I really improved myself since the break up, and thought I'd find someone new and better. I remember I told him to move on and lose all hope of me coming back...I f**ked up. Tell me if something like this happened to you, whether you were the dumper or the dumpee.

 

I've had my ex (actually all of them) come back to me after extended periods of NC. Each one of my ex girlfriends left me because they thought they can find someone better...after a while, they realized the grass isn't "greener" and start to romanitize who I was.

 

But, the truth is they left because they lost sexual attraction and interest in me. Each time they came back and convinced me to talk to them, they'd be super into me and excited. They'd have a high from finally getting me to break NC and give them some sort of attention. However, shortly after talking to me again they'd realize that those "negative" feelings they had with me are still there. I'm a strog believer that once someone losses interest in you it's extremely difficult to get it back. I think you'd have a very similar experience once you get him to talk to you again...you'll shortly realize that you broke up with him for a reason (doesn't mean he's a bad guy), but you lost all attraction you had for him. You can't negotiate attraction.

  • Like 2
Link to post
Share on other sites
I broke up with my ex 9 months ago. I felt so relieved and happy that I got out of the relationship. I thought I lost love and he loved me a lot but I couldn't support him emotionally anymore. I felt like I was okay with him moving on and there was no chance of me coming back, but after 7 months away, I began to think and wonder how he's been doing, and remembering all of the awesome times. We were together for almost a year, like a normal relationship we would have our ups and downs, but it was still great. I realized how loved he made me feel, and I'm starting to want him back more and more everyday. I just noticed that no contact actually worked, but on me. Has anyone else been through this, you lost all feelings but regained them after a long time? I really improved myself since the break up, and thought I'd find someone new and better. I remember I told him to move on and lose all hope of me coming back...I f**ked up. Tell me if something like this happened to you, whether you were the dumper or the dumpee.

 

This is actually a dumpee's dream and I am starting to see what people mean when they say, you'll be back together if it's meant to be.

Just my analysis of your situation and many situations like yours:

 

You and your partner may have been immature, been each other's first few relationships, or had a great relationship and didn't communicate and address the problems. Eventually, your inexperience with relationships, or problems eventually piling up and not addressing them, led you to believe you had "lost" your love for your ex and thought something, another partner or single life, would make you happier. So you broke up, went out to address these feelings, while feeling relieved, but finally had a moment where you realized that it was your partner that did make you happy and you just needed to communicate with your partner more. If it was your first couple of relationships, you realized there aren't many people like your ex out there.

 

They say a dumper takes time to really think about the break up, especially when it's a change of feelings, as you mostly feel relieved after the break up and takes time to miss your partner (paraphrased from Dr. Bonnie Weil).

 

So what it means that if you're meant to be, you will be back together. I think this takes a lot of maturity on both partners, and if your ex took to a lot of websites that address break ups and did these things, it's possible to be back together. Reconciliations are no easy task. You and your ex must have taken steps to see that the break up as a spark to grow individually. Furthermore, do both of you still hold strong feelings towards each other? Did you grow to see that there is compatibility, the only real problem was to address issues and communicate effectively? Does your ex not hold any resentment from the break up? Did your ex grow up, learn from mistakes, and can make this work?

 

Ultimately, you will have to answer these questions as to whether this relationship is worth salvaging and you are willing to fix these issues? Like others have mentioned, a lot of individuals tend to look back on past relationships through rose colored glasses without thinking about the problems that caused it to break. If it's worth it and you do love your ex, and you're ready to talk through a reconciliation VERY SLOWLY or ready to be rejected, talk with your ex.

 

Just what I think and I may be wrong. Just what I've seen and read through. Relationships are a lot of work and confusing... So is love... hahaha

 

Wishing you the best!

 

-WhatDEWWWWW

  • Like 2
Link to post
Share on other sites
  • Author
I posted about this today. I ended it with my ex but it was because he treated me like ****. I miss him because I feel lonely.

 

why did you end yours?

 

I ended it because he wasn't always happy. He had a lot of family issues and I myself had them too. I guess the issues caused us to be stressed and drift apart. I reconnected with my old friends, but still something felt wrong but I couldn't tell what it was, I thought I made the best decision. It took lots of thinking, I thought I was 100% never coming back, and moving on. That hasn't happened. He's been on my mind everyday, IM the one who took him for granted. I would treat him badly...never texted first, never invited him over unless he asked for the 5th time...I'd always be on my phone when he was around, I was a piece of sh*t partner. He would bring up these problems, and he would take the blame. I made him feel unloved. I did love him, but I thought I had him under me since he would always say how hard it would be to end things with me. It felt great to break up for a while, then I evaluated myself, and him. Looking at old pics of him just make me depressed now...I don't think I ever lost love...but just buried it

Link to post
Share on other sites
  • Author
This is actually a dumpee's dream and I am starting to see what people mean when they say, you'll be back together if it's meant to be.

Just my analysis of your situation and many situations like yours:

 

You and your partner may have been immature, been each other's first few relationships, or had a great relationship and didn't communicate and address the problems. Eventually, your inexperience with relationships, or problems eventually piling up and not addressing them, led you to believe you had "lost" your love for your ex and thought something, another partner or single life, would make you happier. So you broke up, went out to address these feelings, while feeling relieved, but finally had a moment where you realized that it was your partner that did make you happy and you just needed to communicate with your partner more. If it was your first couple of relationships, you realized there aren't many people like your ex out there.

 

They say a dumper takes time to really think about the break up, especially when it's a change of feelings, as you mostly feel relieved after the break up and takes time to miss your partner (paraphrased from Dr. Bonnie Weil).

 

So what it means that if you're meant to be, you will be back together. I think this takes a lot of maturity on both partners, and if your ex took to a lot of websites that address break ups and did these things, it's possible to be back together. Reconciliations are no easy task. You and your ex must have taken steps to see that the break up as a spark to grow individually. Furthermore, do both of you still hold strong feelings towards each other? Did you grow to see that there is compatibility, the only real problem was to address issues and communicate effectively? Does your ex not hold any resentment from the break up? Did your ex grow up, learn from mistakes, and can make this work?

 

Ultimately, you will have to answer these questions as to whether this relationship is worth salvaging and you are willing to fix these issues? Like others have mentioned, a lot of individuals tend to look back on past relationships through rose colored glasses without thinking about the problems that caused it to break. If it's worth it and you do love your ex, and you're ready to talk through a reconciliation VERY SLOWLY or ready to be rejected, talk with your ex.

 

Just what I think and I may be wrong. Just what I've seen and read through. Relationships are a lot of work and confusing... So is love... hahaha

 

Wishing you the best!

 

-WhatDEWWWWW

 

I'm pretty sure he hates me guts now. I remember back when we were dating, I made him a headband. He would wear it all the time and he said it represented every little thing I do for him...a few months after the break up he posted on his snapchat story of him burning it. I didn't feel anything except "ok cool" Now I feel like garbage. He has every right to hate me...

Link to post
Share on other sites

Im sorry OP, but if you did all of that in the relationship. . .I'd be surprised if he even answered your phone call. He's probably used this time apart to reflect on how miserable you made him and is now happy with someone who treats him like a human being and not a dog.

 

I think you should just take the lesson and let him be.

  • Like 2
Link to post
Share on other sites
I've had my ex (actually all of them) come back to me after extended periods of NC. Each one of my ex girlfriends left me because they thought they can find someone better...after a while, they realized the grass isn't "greener" and start to romanitize who I was.

 

But, the truth is they left because they lost sexual attraction and interest in me. Each time they came back and convinced me to talk to them, they'd be super into me and excited. They'd have a high from finally getting me to break NC and give them some sort of attention. However, shortly after talking to me again they'd realize that those "negative" feelings they had with me are still there. I'm a strog believer that once someone losses interest in you it's extremely difficult to get it back. I think you'd have a very similar experience once you get him to talk to you again...you'll shortly realize that you broke up with him for a reason (doesn't mean he's a bad guy), but you lost all attraction you had for him. You can't negotiate attraction.

 

 

I think this is true.

 

 

But, what about when the dumpee was acting out of character due to a testing period in their life. I know that has happened to me where I showed a negative side of myself that really would only come out in extreme circumstances.

 

 

Assuming, those issues are over, then you the dumpee would not be showing that side of them at all, which may give the reconciliation a better chance.

 

 

Also, the dumpee has to let the past totally go. The dumper needs to see you as almost a new person, that may allow for some re-attraction.

 

 

Your past opens the door for the meeting, but your present version of yourself is what is needed to gain the attraction (not the old version of you that they discarded).

  • Like 4
Link to post
Share on other sites
I ended it because he wasn't always happy. He had a lot of family issues and I myself had them too. I guess the issues caused us to be stressed and drift apart. I reconnected with my old friends, but still something felt wrong but I couldn't tell what it was, I thought I made the best decision. It took lots of thinking, I thought I was 100% never coming back, and moving on. That hasn't happened. He's been on my mind everyday, IM the one who took him for granted. I would treat him badly...never texted first, never invited him over unless he asked for the 5th time...I'd always be on my phone when he was around, I was a piece of sh*t partner. He would bring up these problems, and he would take the blame. I made him feel unloved. I did love him, but I thought I had him under me since he would always say how hard it would be to end things with me. It felt great to break up for a while, then I evaluated myself, and him. Looking at old pics of him just make me depressed now...I don't think I ever lost love...but just buried it

 

This sounds so similar to my story, although I was the male dumpee.

 

 

I know my EX gf loved me but in the end, I just became to unhappy with some life issues I was having. But before that for like 5 or 6 years, we had some amazing times.

 

 

I have been posting in this forum of an on for the last 2 years since the "real" breakup happened probably for a similar reason to you, only I am on the other end being the dumpee.

 

 

In my case, it was mainly an LDR and as you said we drifted apart mainly due to the issues I was facing at the time. But I think drifting apart is different to living with someone 24/7 and losing attraction due to endless fights and unloading emotional baggage etc.

 

 

I think that is why your feeling the way you are. Your relationship doesn't have a tombstone so to speak, you just drifted apart due to external issues etc.

 

 

If you do reach out, I would suggest you reach out from your heart and show a vulnerability if its there. Anything short of that and he won't respond is he is the dignified man he appears to be. My Ex has been breaking NC a few times (the dumpee) but I have not responded because text messages saying she misses me or wants to know how I am are not worthy of my audience.

  • Like 1
Link to post
Share on other sites
  • Author
I think this is true.

 

 

But, what about when the dumpee was acting out of character due to a testing period in their life. I know that has happened to me where I showed a negative side of myself that really would only come out in extreme circumstances.

 

 

Assuming, those issues are over, then you the dumpee would not be showing that side of them at all, which may give the reconciliation a better chance.

 

 

Also, the dumpee has to let the past totally go. The dumper needs to see you as almost a new person, that may allow for some re-attraction.

 

 

Your past opens the door for the meeting, but your present version of yourself is what is needed to gain the attraction (not the old version of you that they discarded).

 

I've noticed a lot of dumpers concider coming back but just think there's no hope of the dumpee taking them back, so move on. Things that I could never forgive is cheating, and emotional or physical abuse. I think I was emotionally manipulative to my ex. I would get mad at him for bringing up an issue, and if something was stressing him and he got sad, I wouldn't be there. If I was sad, he would stop everything to comfort me as much as possible. I think when the dumper is under so much stress, they don't think about the positives, but mostly the negatives of their partner. I thought it was for the best until I really started to think...I do not regret breaking up with him because it allowed me to grow so much, and if I even want a shot I have to show him that I changed. I remember after the break up, his friend would ask me if there's a chance in the future and if I still have feelings and all that. I told her there's no chance, and had no feelings. I think that I just said that for an ego boost and power. I felt that I could ask him back at any second, and he would bow down. A break up is a symptom of a problem, so like an illness, you have to treat it right. Sometimrs dumpers feel they are in the right, when in reality they are blinded by stress and bad thoughts.

  • Like 3
Link to post
Share on other sites
I've noticed a lot of dumpers concider coming back but just think there's no hope of the dumpee taking them back, so move on. Things that I could never forgive is cheating, and emotional or physical abuse. I think I was emotionally manipulative to my ex. I would get mad at him for bringing up an issue, and if something was stressing him and he got sad, I wouldn't be there. If I was sad, he would stop everything to comfort me as much as possible. I think when the dumper is under so much stress, they don't think about the positives, but mostly the negatives of their partner. I thought it was for the best until I really started to think...I do not regret breaking up with him because it allowed me to grow so much, and if I even want a shot I have to show him that I changed. I remember after the break up, his friend would ask me if there's a chance in the future and if I still have feelings and all that. I told her there's no chance, and had no feelings. I think that I just said that for an ego boost and power. I felt that I could ask him back at any second, and he would bow down. A break up is a symptom of a problem, so like an illness, you have to treat it right. Sometimrs dumpers feel they are in the right, when in reality they are blinded by stress and bad thoughts.

 

This is exactly how my ex treated me.

 

 

Truth be told, if my Ex showed a genuine interest at reconciliation, I would consider the offer. Anything less than a respectful and loving attempt at reconciliation, I'd probably tell her to take a hike.

 

 

We don't choose who we love. Silly me :(

Link to post
Share on other sites
I'm pretty sure he hates me guts now. I remember back when we were dating, I made him a headband. He would wear it all the time and he said it represented every little thing I do for him...a few months after the break up he posted on his snapchat story of him burning it. I didn't feel anything except "ok cool" Now I feel like garbage. He has every right to hate me...

 

Well, I can tell you as a dumpee, I haven't burned things that my ex gave me. I HAVE thought about it. But I think it's too mean but there are things that we dumpees do out of spite during the anger from being broken up with. Human beings are all complex and we all make mistakes. I wouldn't say to go beg, although No Contact guides say that dumpees shouldn't respond to anything other than the ex saying "I made a mistake and I want to work on us again." If your ex is a compassionate person, just make the phone call. What do you have to lose now by reaching out and attempting to get back with a person who you feel may be someone you can marry?

 

I would also suggest you take some time to get out of this rut that you seem to be in. You're at the place where you're taking a lot of the blame for the break up. Yes, there were things you did wrong. There were things your ex did wrong. When you're at a place where you can see that, then you can really consider reaching out. Relationships are founded upon love. Love is forgiving and kind, it doesn't allow you to hold onto resentment of things an ex did. Hope you can remember that :)

 

Again, I'd just like to say, if you really feel like you love your ex, you can try to just give a phone call. Who knows what might happen. But get yourself in a little better place!

 

-WhatDEWWWWW

  • Like 2
Link to post
Share on other sites
I've noticed a lot of dumpers concider coming back but just think there's no hope of the dumpee taking them back, so move on. Things that I could never forgive is cheating, and emotional or physical abuse. I think I was emotionally manipulative to my ex. I would get mad at him for bringing up an issue, and if something was stressing him and he got sad, I wouldn't be there. If I was sad, he would stop everything to comfort me as much as possible. I think when the dumper is under so much stress, they don't think about the positives, but mostly the negatives of their partner. I thought it was for the best until I really started to think...I do not regret breaking up with him because it allowed me to grow so much, and if I even want a shot I have to show him that I changed. I remember after the break up, his friend would ask me if there's a chance in the future and if I still have feelings and all that. I told her there's no chance, and had no feelings. I think that I just said that for an ego boost and power. I felt that I could ask him back at any second, and he would bow down. A break up is a symptom of a problem, so like an illness, you have to treat it right. Sometimrs dumpers feel they are in the right, when in reality they are blinded by stress and bad thoughts.

 

This is typically how most relationships where the female is the dumper transpires. If she is not emotional damaged and dumps a decent guy for no reasons, she will self reflect on that relationship. Most women refuse to go back because of female nature..

 

Its very rare for women to go back to anything... where most often men have no problems going back. Its very often men buy the old car they had in high school or fix the broken lawn mower... while women prefer to get a new car or a new lawn mower. Its just the nature of genders (on average)

 

I always tell men the rationalization period of a women takes longer than a man. Men take longer to get over a women, but the grieving process starts earlier. It takes women a longer time to reflect than men.

 

Women bury the grieving process and think everything is fine and get stuck in a fog of egocentrism and get stuck in the idea they can capture another man with ease. This is true, but those feeling will come back and only if the ex was really amazing or great will the regret kick in.

 

I

  • Like 5
Link to post
Share on other sites
I ended it because he wasn't always happy. He had a lot of family issues and I myself had them too. I guess the issues caused us to be stressed and drift apart. I reconnected with my old friends, but still something felt wrong but I couldn't tell what it was, I thought I made the best decision. It took lots of thinking, I thought I was 100% never coming back, and moving on. That hasn't happened. He's been on my mind everyday, IM the one who took him for granted. I would treat him badly...never texted first, never invited him over unless he asked for the 5th time...I'd always be on my phone when he was around, I was a piece of sh*t partner. He would bring up these problems, and he would take the blame. I made him feel unloved. I did love him, but I thought I had him under me since he would always say how hard it would be to end things with me. It felt great to break up for a while, then I evaluated myself, and him. Looking at old pics of him just make me depressed now...I don't think I ever lost love...but just buried it

 

Everything you said here screams uninterested during the relationship. And no offensive, your ex sounded like a doormat to you (someone you walk all over and never full let in). Don't fool yourself to think that it'll be different for you if you go back, you're just not that into them. That's all this was. I can guarantee you if you were with someone you really liked and loved, you would've acted completely different. Like I said before, your interest is peaked because he had the balls to cut you off. Bet you if he stuck around and begged for you back till today, your reaction and thoughts towards him would be significantly different.

 

For all the nice things your ex provided, it truly didn't matter because you were not into him and did not respect him. Hell, I'd argue he didn't respect himself by letting it get to that point with you. If I was him, I would've kicked you out the door so fast because I would be able to see that deep down inside you were not into me. Your ex failed at putting his foot down with you early on and not being scared to walk away from you. You mentioned it here, he didn't have the guts to do it because he loved you too much. If you loved him like that, you wouldn't be able to end it either.

 

Just because you can't find anyone better right now doesn't mean that your ex is right for you. If he was, trust me, you would've never broke up with him and treated him the way you did.

  • Like 1
Link to post
Share on other sites
movingonnow1
This is typically how most relationships where the female is the dumper transpires. If she is not emotional damaged and dumps a decent guy for no reasons, she will self reflect on that relationship. Most women refuse to go back because of female nature..

 

Its very rare for women to go back to anything... where most often men have no problems going back. Its very often men buy the old car they had in high school or fix the broken lawn mower... while women prefer to get a new car or a new lawn mower. Its just the nature of genders (on average)

 

I always tell men the rationalization period of a women takes longer than a man. Men take longer to get over a women, but the grieving process starts earlier. It takes women a longer time to reflect than men.

 

Women bury the grieving process and think everything is fine and get stuck in a fog of egocentrism and get stuck in the idea they can capture another man with ease. This is true, but those feeling will come back and only if the ex was really amazing or great will the regret kick in.

 

I

 

I'd also like to add women rarely go back because they just aren't into the person (attracted) which led them to breaking up with their man. Plus, if a woman feels she can do better than you once, she will feel that again. There is probably something in her brain about why she left you, and although she can't explain it, she has this switch go off and she's done wanting to be with you.

 

Also, I've been on the forum for a long time...I've seen countless posts regarding this type of stuff and it almost always leads to the dumper leaving that person again after they get back together.

  • Like 2
Link to post
Share on other sites
Guest
This topic is now closed to further replies.
×
×
  • Create New...