PMk263 Posted November 3, 2016 Share Posted November 3, 2016 Hello I wanted advice me and ex boyfriend have been broken up for 3 months now he has blocked my number ignored emails etc and has done this before when we broke up just not this extreme ... I did the no contact and after a month I called him and he sounded irritated the fact I called ... he has a mother of which whom never cared for me and I'm sure she has a lot of influence on his actions (she has told me to ignore him to leave her son alone ) problem is she was part of a lot of our problems that resulted in our intitial breakup .. we were engaged and I still think he is the love of my life ... I have had to call from other numbers just to get him to talk to me , I ran into him at our sons daycare as he was droppping off his other son I said hi to the son n continued to my car like he didn't exist well this seemd effective I called him right after I left and he was willing to talk he sounded like he missed me and stated could tell I lost a lot of weight and looked great now I have been calling for the last week and seems like now he's willing to talk after he saw my appearance change for the better , I even asked him two days later to meet up with me he said he would let me know .. which was shocking due to the fact two weeks ago he was hanging up on me at the sound of my voice , when it came down to meeting of course he had an excuse not to show my question is when is it a good time to ask him again it's only been a day but at least I have him talking to me briefly never longer than 3 minutes .... I just want to work things out he has distanced hisself and I don't know how to change this .. I am trying so hard to get the love of my life my sons father back !! 1 Link to post Share on other sites
ChickiePops Posted November 3, 2016 Share Posted November 3, 2016 There is no advice..all of those get your ex back programs are complete nonsense. You can only get someone back when they actually want you back, and it won't work unless you've changed the issues that made you break up in the first place. 3 months isn't nearly long enough to have made substantial changes, so even if you do get back together, it's unlikely that it would work out. The best thing you can do is be a good mom to your son and work on having a civil relationship with him so you can co-parent harmoniously. If it happens down the line, it'll happen, but there are no specific actions you can take to 'win' him back and make it stick. 4 Link to post Share on other sites
stillafool Posted November 3, 2016 Share Posted November 3, 2016 Do you want someone who might want you back because you lost a few pounds? What happens when you gain them back? Since he is the one who broke up with you, has blocked you, won't take your calls, he has to be the one chasing after you to get you back or it won't work. You cannot blame his mother as he is a grown man with 2 kids. My advice would be to leave him alone now because chasing him is unattractive and will push him further away. He may get together with you to experience sex with your new body but it is doubtful that he will change his mind after sex. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
negritaultra Posted November 3, 2016 Share Posted November 3, 2016 i would use this time to keep rebuilding and working on myself .As the person above states , someone can only come back if they really and truly want to and you and that person have to be completely different people and have a new level of understanding ... which cannot include things that tore you apart in the past . People can change their mind at any given moment because they're just so fickle . You should focus on yourself in your child in the meantime . Might still be too early to say if there was any significant change 3 Link to post Share on other sites
Author PMk263 Posted November 3, 2016 Author Share Posted November 3, 2016 Wow thank u for that , I don't even think the sexual thing will happen I have been doing everything in my power to even get him to talk to me ... it's really sad I think he's making a hug mistake , 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author PMk263 Posted November 3, 2016 Author Share Posted November 3, 2016 @chickiepop it's really hard we lived together he has two previous children and I do as well not including our son and we all miss him so much .... I was hoping for a change in him but to me the fact he's been answering the last week shows me he's more open to talking instead of ignoring me forever , we split towards end of July and he has made no attempt toco tact me even to pick up our boy he just rather see him at the daycare I always looked at it like it's a temper tantrum to hurt me by not coming to assist. But I know he and myself have a friendship like no other I just think all of the ignoring is soemthing designed to upset me over the last months but now as I'm showing him I'm not worried he seems to be opening up 1 Link to post Share on other sites
kvolm2016 Posted November 6, 2016 Share Posted November 6, 2016 Sometimes this is a helpful way to sort out your thoughts: Explain what makes him the love of your life. What is it about him that makes you want him back? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
KM32 Posted November 6, 2016 Share Posted November 6, 2016 I think it's time to get things set up to get your child support payments, give him the opportunity to be a dad if he wants to, but to move on emotionally. Even if you were to temporarily lure him back, this is not a relationship that is going anywhere, and I think you know that in your heart. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
ChickiePops Posted November 6, 2016 Share Posted November 6, 2016 @chickiepop it's really hard we lived together he has two previous children and I do as well not including our son and we all miss him so much .... I was hoping for a change in him but to me the fact he's been answering the last week shows me he's more open to talking instead of ignoring me forever , we split towards end of July and he has made no attempt toco tact me even to pick up our boy he just rather see him at the daycare I always looked at it like it's a temper tantrum to hurt me by not coming to assist. But I know he and myself have a friendship like no other I just think all of the ignoring is soemthing designed to upset me over the last months but now as I'm showing him I'm not worried he seems to be opening up So he was a bad boyfriend, he only cares about your looks, AND he's a neglectful father? You hit the trifecta there! Guy is a loser. Even if you did get him back it's doubtful it'd be permanent..like I said, it's like putting a band aid over a gushing wound. Nothing has changed since you broke up except for a few extra lbs. So.. if you gain any weight back how do you know he won't just dump you again? 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Satu Posted November 6, 2016 Share Posted November 6, 2016 The fact that he's talking to you now doesn't mean that he will want to get back together with you. I'd be careful about raising my hopes of this, if I were you. Focus on yourself and your children. Whatever is meant to be will be. Take care. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
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