urmysong Posted June 28, 2016 Share Posted June 28, 2016 Been 3 months and half since he broke up with me. I did not tell my parents and my sisters and friends about it cause I am shy that my own family is broken. I am scared to let them know. I was a psalmists in church so the priest and few people in church knew me married to this guy. And they told me before that we are not for each other cause we have big age gaps and cannot get married in church because he was married in church before so we just get married civil in my country. Now, I am scared that they will know about it. What will I do? I will feel so ashamed of myself having failed marriage and broken family. How and what to do so I will not feel this way? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Satu Posted June 28, 2016 Share Posted June 28, 2016 You need to tell them. Guilty secrets get heavier the longer you carry them. Take care. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
basil67 Posted June 28, 2016 Share Posted June 28, 2016 When you tell your family, simply tell them that you wish you'd listened and you had to learn the hard way. They can't say "I told you so" if you beat them to the punch. Besides, every other person seems to be divorced. I see more sadness in staying in an unhappy marriage than leaving it to make a better life. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author urmysong Posted June 28, 2016 Author Share Posted June 28, 2016 I did not tell anyone cause I am still hoping that he will come back. I don't want my family will think bad to him. I am also scared that if i will tell my family and my ex would know that I told them, it will make him not to come back with me. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author urmysong Posted June 28, 2016 Author Share Posted June 28, 2016 I have 7 sisters and 1 brother the youngest. And only me has failed marriage. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
basil67 Posted June 28, 2016 Share Posted June 28, 2016 Has he given any indication that he might come back? Why did he leave? Have the issues which made him leave been fixed? You can't hope for him to return if nothing has changed. Do you love him? If so, why? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author urmysong Posted June 28, 2016 Author Share Posted June 28, 2016 He broke up with me cause I brought up the past. Because he changed, so I opened up everything to him how I feel and how much I got hurt by his words and actions. I didn't mean to tell him how bad he is but I opened up with him to let him know how I feel. But not for him to break up with me but for him to understand my feelings. But he understood it wrong. I told him that I was hurt when he kissed the girl who cleaned our house that day he is drunk. He broke up with me because he thinks that I am using our son as a fuel for our arguments. I did not expect that it will make him broke up with me just because I am opening up the things he had done which he said he didn't even know. No, he did not give any indication that he might come back. But before he broke up with me, he said that our conflicts seems unsolvable and lets give it sometimes for the emotions to get out of the game. But It made me panick so I emailed him "please don't give up on us, I never gave up on us when I was hurt". And after 2 days, he emailed me that we will separate, and that we never will be again". I am thinking maybe he was just stress. Maybe he just need sometime. I love him, yes. Very much. I don't know why. I can't explain this feeling inside. It hurts me when he kissed another girl when he was drunk. For 9 years 10 years in total cause we were gf/bf for 1 year and 1 month, it will not last that long if I don't love him. I still love him until now. I still want him to come back. He is my first boyfriend, my first love and everything. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
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