Otter2569 Posted June 11, 2016 Share Posted June 11, 2016 Five months NC today and she is still on my mind....about a 100 times a day. Its like she is always there; when I listen to music, When I am home, when I go out, when I look at other women, even in my dreams. At times I get teary and sad. It amazes me how many things bring her to mind. It feels like I will always miss her to some degree I know it would have never lasted, her personal issues would have ruined me but she is the first woman that I truly ever loved and that's tough to get past. There is no going back, I know that, but damn it still makes me sad. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Emilia Posted June 11, 2016 Share Posted June 11, 2016 It's been longer for me but I feel that same. It always takes a bloody age to get over someone. It does go away eventually though. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Happenstousall Posted June 11, 2016 Share Posted June 11, 2016 It's been longer for me but I feel that same. It always takes a bloody age to get over someone. It does go away eventually though. I suppose the trick is to get over the ex before moving on. I don't think i got over my last relationship before going into my most recent one. That failed after 5 1/2 years which leaves me with all that stuff to deal with. Better just to take however long it takes and ask yourself, when you start something new, "am i ready?". It's not something we want to ask but something we should, for our own good, our future partners and the sake of whatever relationships we form. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
Emilia Posted June 11, 2016 Share Posted June 11, 2016 I suppose the trick is to get over the ex before moving on. I don't think i got over my last relationship before going into my most recent one. That failed after 5 1/2 years which leaves me with all that stuff to deal with. Better just to take however long it takes and ask yourself, when you start something new, "am i ready?". It's not something we want to ask but something we should, for our own good, our future partners and the sake of whatever relationships we form. Don't disagree, except I don't always realise when I'm over someone, sometimes it's only the case when I start seeing someone new and I suddenly think 'oh my god, I can't believe I wasted so much mental energy on my ex, this person is so much cooler.' It's what happened to me last time. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
sooshi Posted June 11, 2016 Share Posted June 11, 2016 Keep at it. You're doing great. Each situation is different, and healing from any particular experience can progress differently. You cared for her deeply and she is a part of you. Again, you're doing well. NC is not easy, but you're doing it for your own healing, and that's wonderful. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Buddhist Posted June 11, 2016 Share Posted June 11, 2016 You're doing well. I got to 5yrs before I realised I had to let it go. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Satu Posted June 11, 2016 Share Posted June 11, 2016 Five months NC today and she is still on my mind....about a 100 times a day. Five months is still early in your recovery process. It doesn't have to take a very long time, but five months is inside the 'acute' phase. Here's a quote from Shakespeare, which I like: “Some grief shows much of love, But much of grief shows still some want of wit.” ― William Shakespeare, Romeo and Juliet Take care. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
longjohn Posted June 12, 2016 Share Posted June 12, 2016 You just have to try and shake it off. When I left my then wife I wasn't pleased. I wasted an entire year before I got out there and started dating again. I should have done it sooner. Now one more failed relationship later I'm not wasting anytime. I'm getting back on that horse and doing some dating. I'm sure there's another lucky ex Mrs Longjohn out there waiting for me ha 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Otter2569 Posted June 12, 2016 Author Share Posted June 12, 2016 It's been longer for me but I feel that same. It always takes a bloody age to get over someone. It does go away eventually though. Its funny because I can usually shake it off and move on...not so much this time. She is the only woman that I ever really loved. I honestly think it was a once in a lifetime experience. We connected on all levels...I dont think anyone can compare to her. I know I will get over it, I always do. It feels good getting control of my life and having time for mysef again. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Otter2569 Posted June 12, 2016 Author Share Posted June 12, 2016 You just have to try and shake it off. When I left my then wife I wasn't pleased. I wasted an entire year before I got out there and started dating again. I should have done it sooner. Now one more failed relationship later I'm not wasting anytime. I'm getting back on that horse and doing some dating. I'm sure there's another lucky ex Mrs Longjohn out there waiting for me ha That's how I live my life! I'm too damn good and I know in my heart that I have a lot to offer (on many levels) so you wont find me sitting at home crying. I am out and I am smiling like nothing ever happened. Behind the scenes I am taking time for me and doing as I please. I do NOT want a relationship and I am upfront about that. I have no problem getting a date and having fun and that is exactly where I need to be at this moment. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
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