Will she try to comeback again??

[Tonice]

First please excuse my grammar and spelling.

 

Back in October of 2015. Started dating a nice woman with a 4 year old son. Very nice woman seemed to be hurt in the past. We stayed up talking for hours and hours. But first weekend she was at my house I was making us dinner and she got a phone call from her EX ( of about a year)she was on the phone over 45 minutes. Crying most of the conversation. I heard some of it [] when she got off I hugged her and said everything will be ok but you should not give him the time of day. That's when I was told more how he was a ( manipulative, content not trying to better himself, all about sex, have to check his phone and computer).

 

Well he contacted her again when I was at her house saying I hope he can get you off in bed and to this that and this to you. I told he all you two had was sex seems like nother else.

 

Later on that month I stayed over night on a Thursday night. And he was knocking on her window at 1:30am wanting her back. (Ended up getting a trespassing ticket). After that she did not feel safe. And she wanted to move in with me. I thought it was to soon but being nice I said yes. So right before thanksgiving she did. We painted the house and new carpet to make it feel more like ours than mine and my ex wife's. Things seemed to be going good he seemed to be out of the picture. Than it seemed like every little thing caused a fight. Long and short she moved out December 17-20 to find she was back with him. But blamed me and made him sound like a god.

 

Now keep in mind he makes little money. ( she makes 75k a year)

Lives in a trailer ( nothing wrong with that but it's a run down junk box) can't pay for anything ( she pays for it all). She owns a house she can't live in because all the bad memories of him. He friends can't stand him her family can't stand him. Almost lost her job because of him. He has forced sex on her.

 

Now a month or so later I send her flowers to her work. All her co workers know they are from me because no one but me ever gave her flowers. So we talked and decided to work on is. She left him and it was like we never missed a beat. Her friends sent me messages thanking me for not giving up on her and hope we last because I'm the best man she has ever had.

 

So she's in a apartment no because she rented her house out. And 3-4 weeks later she wants to move in. Again I said ok. Things are going great we go on weekend get aways when she don't have her son. ( that I treat like mine). I gave her a promise ring. Than we get engaged ( she wanted it more but I was ok with it). Planned some nice trips for the summer. Talked about building a new house put our money together ect building a life together.

 

Well one day In the beginning of April I had a feeling that she was by her ex so I drive to the trailer park and I see her car in the drive. I texted her a picture and said I'm done. I got every excuse why she was there. Long and short we talked the next day and said let's stay together.

 

That Monday I get the text. I love you him and I can never be together his life is unmanageable and I don't need him or want a relationship with him.

 

Well a week goes by and she moves out again says she feels trapped ect ect

Than I get a text on how I'm in to my money house cats fancy things and being the best at what I try. ( I said your back with your ex). He puts anyone that works hard down

 

 

Turned out I was right. She is back with him. She can't tell her friends her best one found out from me. I told her friend all they have is sex nothing else. Won't last long she will be back. And her friend don't understand why she is doing this.

 

Now her it is a moth later she still has friends that thought we were still together.

 

 

I maybe wrong but when things go bad again I will get a call or text. She is a great woman till he gets in her head than she leaves and goes to him. I don't think it's over for us but I can't do this again. And I think she needs to start thinking about her son. ( if I was the dad we be in court already being she moved 7 times from July 2014 till now)

 

If this guy was a nice guy or worth something I would be ok with it. But if you have to hide it and your friends and family dislike him it's not good.

[privategal]

Where is your dignity and self respect? She never STOPPED being with him, he was never an ex.

Shes crazy and has brought so much drama to your life...ate up money on ring, flowers, paint, carpet...all the while she never was out of contact with him.

Please get yourself together, fix your self esteem...drop any extra belongings of hers off at the trailer...block your phone, email, change your locks and never look back.

There is something WAY OFF about you even considering her back....no more deama. Be firm, end it, seek counseling.

[Tonice]

Where is your dignity and self respect? She never STOPPED being with him, he was never an ex.

Shes crazy and has brought so much drama to your life...ate up money on ring, flowers, paint, carpet...all the while she never was out of contact with him.

Please get yourself together, fix your self esteem...drop any extra belongings of hers off at the trailer...block your phone, email, change your locks and never look back.

There is something WAY OFF about you even considering her back....no more deama. Be firm, end it, seek counseling.

 

I want her to try so I can tell her no have fun with him

[privategal]

Are you serious?!

That sounds desperate and emotional and jealous.

You need to google codependency and get help.

If you had any self respect you'd never say one word to her again.

If she was sobbing and begging on your door step Id have her removed.

Something is wrong with even CONSIDERING A-N-Y contact.

She was always with him.

He breaks up with her and she uses other men to get him back is my guess.

You really need to look at yourself here...you need to regroup and get in touch with reality. Its scary youd hope shed contact you.

Thats games and immature.

Stop all of that.

Silence (FOREVER) will say everything you ever wanted to say.

[LD1990]

I want her to try so I can tell her no have fun with him

 

Come on man, are you in middle school? You're hurt because she played you, but if you think you're going to get some measure of revenge, you're mistaken. She has already shown that she's better at playing games than you, and she has less emotional attachment than you. The end result - you're going to eventually get hurt whenever you have contact with her.

 

Move on with your life instead of hoping some cheater comes back so you can proudly tell her off (although she'd actually likely sucker you again and have you buying her more flowers and letting her move in).

[Satu]

She was never 'with' you.

 

You were nothing more than a pawn in their game.

 

Really.

 

Nothing more than that.

[privategal]

Come on man, are you in middle school? You're hurt because she played you, but if you think you're going to get some measure of revenge, you're mistaken. She has already shown that she's better at playing games than you, and she has less emotional attachment than you. The end result - you're going to eventually get hurt whenever you have contact with her.

 

Move on with your life instead of hoping some cheater comes back so you can proudly tell her off (although she'd actually likely sucker you again and have you buying her more flowers and letting her move in).

 

^^^THIS

You arent done. Any other guy would never have taken her back again nor had another date with her after she spent 45 min on the phone with her ex crying at your home on the FIRST DATE...second date...another call...next sleepover hes at her window...you find her sneaking to his home.....it goes on and on.

The red flags were all around and werent just red...they were on fire with every single faux pas a potential girlfriend could make...you excused it all...let her live with you again...

This my friend...is not normal.

What you tolerated is disgusting and no woman will respect you being a doormat.

She walked all over you...took free meals, gifts, a home to stay in like a hotel while she cheated the whole time.

Open your EYES...SHE actually isnt the problem...YOU are.

You have to get your neediness, and ddesperation for ANY partner and love sorted out.

Work on your career...work on your appearance at the gym...surround yourself with good hardworking people of class and higher your standards cause the more I think of a 1st date with your date spending 45 minutes of your date talking on the phone in your home with her ex while you make her dinner?

She showed you UP FRONT exactly who she was. You allowed it so she took advantage of you and had no respect.

Their next fight she will be calling you...show her self respect by changing your number. Get a grip. "Have fun with him" says wahhhh you picked him over me. Shes TRASH.

You should have shown her the door that night and never looked back.

Not sure if your reasons for divorce too but its time to take a HARD LOOK in the mirror. Sorry for being harsh but want to help you.

Edited May 23, 2016 by privategal

[Tonice]

I was married for 20 years just grew apart I was more with my cars and she was with her yard. We still talk every couple days and easier a beautiful daughter together. And thank you for taking time time it all helps me show her the door when she knocks on it. She was the first after a 20 year marriage

 

And its cost her 1000 each time she moved plus her apartment. So 4 grand so far

Edited May 23, 2016 by Tonice

[privategal]

I was married for 20 years just grew apart I was more with my cars and she was with her yard. We still talk every couple days and easier a beautiful daughter together. And thank you for taking time time it all helps me show her the door when she knocks on it. She was the first after a 20 year marriage

 

And its cost her 1000 each time she moved plus her apartment. So 4 grand so far

 

And its costing you alot more emotionally and adding drama to your life. She is drama..you pay the price. Not worth another second of your energy.

Block her.