Blue73 Posted September 2, 2015 Share Posted September 2, 2015 I have a question regarding those who are the dumper but are sooooo sad about change in life, missing you, missing your closeness, etc etc. WHY wouldnt they want to get back together? In my situation, I felt him pulling away doing the hot/cold thing for the past 6 weeks and told him that I needed a break from the whole US thing. Then he said he felt he lost the passion for us and me which is why he was acting that way. he wasnt really all that excited about me and us anymore. (truth: I was acting a little needy towards the end due to his behavior) We both wavered from a break; to ending with no contact; ending with contact; break with contact; break with no contact- landing on break with contact but he doesnt know what his feelings will be like in the future. So basically he ended us. BUT....... he is depressed, sad, missing us, etc etc... THEN WHY wouldnt you want to get back together if your so sad. In my opinion if I lost the US factor in someone I wouldnt be all that sad..no? Link to post Share on other sites
Oregon_Dude Posted September 2, 2015 Share Posted September 2, 2015 he said he felt he lost the passion for us and me which is why he was acting that way. he wasnt really all that excited about me and us anymore ... WHY wouldnt you want to get back together if your so sad. In my opinion if I lost the US factor in someone I wouldnt be all that sad..no?He misses the companionship and the relationship, but also knows in his heart that you are not the one for him. He's sad about being lonely, essentially. I would cease all contact and try not to analyze. There's someone else out there (many someones, actually) who WILL be excited about you. 4 Link to post Share on other sites
kismetkismet Posted September 2, 2015 Share Posted September 2, 2015 Knowing that someone isn't right for you doesn't make it much less painful unfortunately. It's very sad losing someone that was a big part of your life whether or not you feel it's a step in the right direction or not. I was the dumper in my relationship, mainly for him being aloof/guarded but also because we wanted different things in life. And i was devastated. I still loved him a LOT, but I knew we probably didn't have much of a future together. He was also extremely depressed about it, moreso than me at first, but knows that it was the right decision. It actually took us a long time to really accept the breakup to be honest.. we went back and forth for 5 months about whether we should get back together or not and if we could work through our incompatibilities. Because we did, and do, love each other. But that's not always enough. We weren't able to make each other happy and we wanted different things.. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
BriNyc82 Posted September 3, 2015 Share Posted September 3, 2015 I have a question regarding those who are the dumper but are sooooo sad about change in life, missing you, missing your closeness, etc etc. WHY wouldnt they want to get back together? BUT....... he is depressed, sad, missing us, etc etc... THEN WHY wouldnt you want to get back together if your so sad. In my opinion if I lost the US factor in someone I wouldnt be all that sad..no? Being sad or missing someone isn't solely enough of a reason to want someone back. Im sure he DOES miss you and parts of your relationship but he also knows it wasn't enough. If you both continued he probably knows things wouldn't change. Link to post Share on other sites
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