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Moving Out, Feeling Overwhelmed


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Been living with BF for over 2 years, been together almost 4.

 

I'm breaking up with him today after nearly a year of deliberation and it's only fair that I move out.

 

Searching for an apartment is putting me on the verge of a panic attack I'm having trouble breathing and having chest pains. I'm sure other factors are at play here but the thought of not being able to find the apartment I want is putting me over the edge. I have to do this though.

 

Has anyone experienced this and can offer some advice on calming down? I just started a new job a couple months ago I can't afford to have a breakdown or take time off.

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Sorry you are in such a panic. It's no wonder though: new job, breaking up.

 

 

Claire Weekes has come highly recommended from several people on an anxiety forum. You could perhaps check out her books.

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Also, do you have to actually find an apartment today?

 

 

You took a year to come to this decision, so why the rush?

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I'm afraid he will try to "get a reaction" out of me in retaliation for the break up. He doesn't believe I feel bad about it, and he can be vindictive. I already feel miserable and I honestly don't know if I can handle him turning on me like that right now. So I just want to get out of his way ASAP.

 

Thank you for the recommendation.

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Sorry to hear that. Obviously it's causing you additional stress.

 

 

Can you take your time finding an apartment, then break-up with him?

 

 

Also, have you reached out to friends and family to let them know what's going on?

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My ex broke up with me and didn't want to move out, despite having a secret new love interest. I tried to kick her out, she broke down and had a panic attack and I ended up letting her stay. She had a new love interest, new apartment (eventually), a new job and new friends. She'd be a good person to ask lol

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Can you get somewhere to stay temporarily (friend/family/short term accommodation) until you get an apartment?

 

If not, can you postpone the breakup until you have something organised?

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If push comes to shove I'll stay in a hotel - didn't think about that.

 

Thanks everyone.

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If push comes to shove I'll stay in a hotel - didn't think about that.

 

Thanks everyone.

 

Yeah...Look into an extended stay place for a week or so. It'll give you time and space to find a place. Once you're out of his "space" you'll have a clearer head.

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