Jump to content

Dumped - could there be a connection to his mother's death?


Recommended Posts

I've been my now ex-boyfriend for over one year. It was perfect, he loved me to bits, I never felt so secure in any other relationship I had. He was very open with me, we talked about everything.

 

We traveled to many places and did a lot of things I always wanted to do.

His father died of cancer 2 years ago, and he was living close to his mother. Their houses were very close, they shared the same garden.

 

In December, before going on a trip for 3 weeks, he found out that it is possible that his mother has cancer. We had many fights on this trip, we were both stressed about his mothers condition.

After we returned from the trip, in January the doctors confirmed it is a very aggressive form of cancer. He did everything he could do, searched for the best doctors, etc. His mother got worse every day and at the end of February she died.

After her death we went on a trip for a week, he told me he needs it. He seemed ok, he did not seem like he was grieving, which was very strange because I knew how close they were.

 

3 weeks ago, I felt something is wrong. I couldn't tell what, but we all know that feeling. Then one evening he just came to my place to tell me he is not happy, we are different and he wants to break up. He needs space. He told me it's not just me. He feels a lot of pressure also because he needs to fix his mother's house (getting all the things out so that he can rent it), he has problems with his bussines that he has to fix. I couldn't believe what happened, some months ago that guy wanted to marry me and we were supposed to move in together in autumn...and now?!?!

 

The next day I met him to pick up some of my things from his place (we are neighbors every day I go to work I pass in front of his house).

 

He said that right now, he does not want a relationship. He also said that it is possible that in 5 months or 1 year he will regret his decision.

He said he is sure we'll stay friends, because we have so many things in common.He said that whatever I would need something, he'll be there for me.

 

The first days, I felt like I won't give up that easy on this relationship. Sent emails, etc. He responded to one email, saying that he wants me to get over those feelings towards him, to keep in mind he wants to be friends, and after that we both will see things more clearly.

 

I tried to figure out what happened, and the only that came to mind is that he changed after his mothers death.

 

And while I am feeling lonely and lost, can't eat (I went from 54 kgs to 40 in one week), can't sleep he keeps busy with work and friends and seems happy...(even if he told me that he's not doing great, and can't sleep well).

 

 

Any inputs on this? Any advice would help me.

Edited by sad_bunny
Link to post
Share on other sites
×
×
  • Create New...