Jump to content

First breadcrumb after more than a year


Recommended Posts

Hey all,

 

I've been dumped over a year ago. We had a very loving relationship until I went abroad for a few months. We couldn't handle the distance that well and one day she called me and it was over. She refused to talk about it or see me when I got back, probably because it was easier to ignore her problems than to cope with them. She had someone else a month later and apparently they are still together now. At first she blocked me on facebook and later unblocked / blocked me a few times, but I kept strict no contact all the time.

A few weeks ago I met her by coincidence and she tried to ignore me as good as she could. A few days later, she liked a picture of me on Instagram and yesterday I got a notification that she followed me on Instagram, but when I checked it wasn't the case. So she is checking my profile and pressed 'follow' by mistake I guess, after which she directly unfollowed me.

I will keep strict no contact, but because of this she's come back into my mind a bit, which sucks because I thought I was over her. But maybe I'm not completely over her and I keep thinking she's not over me either. Sometimes I even keep believing there will be a second chance for us one day...

Link to post
Share on other sites
SycamoreCircle
Hey all,

 

I've been dumped over a year ago. We had a very loving relationship until I went abroad for a few months. We couldn't handle the distance that well and one day she called me and it was over. She refused to talk about it or see me when I got back, probably because it was easier to ignore her problems than to cope with them. She had someone else a month later and apparently they are still together now. At first she blocked me on facebook and later unblocked / blocked me a few times, but I kept strict no contact all the time.

A few weeks ago I met her by coincidence and she tried to ignore me as good as she could. A few days later, she liked a picture of me on Instagram and yesterday I got a notification that she followed me on Instagram, but when I checked it wasn't the case. So she is checking my profile and pressed 'follow' by mistake I guess, after which she directly unfollowed me.

I will keep strict no contact, but because of this she's come back into my mind a bit, which sucks because I thought I was over her. But maybe I'm not completely over her and I keep thinking she's not over me either. Sometimes I even keep believing there will be a second chance for us one day...

If she had someone else a month later, she had someone else a month before. Stop monitoring her monitoring of you. The only thing worse than a surveillance camera is a surveillance camera. There are women out there who know what they want. Be a man who knows what he wants. You will suffer less.
  • Like 1
Link to post
Share on other sites
If she had someone else a month later, she had someone else a month before. .

 

That is not necessarily true.

Not every woman who moves from one relationship to another is a cheater. Many have checked out for months before they make the final decision to split, so when they do split they are in a position to move on.

 

The dumpee is blindsided and finds the fact she moves on quickly surprising, and then the accusations come, many totally unfounded...

  • Like 2
Link to post
Share on other sites
SycamoreCircle

I'm speaking loosely and figuratively. Having someone else a month before may as well allude to her being checked out a month before, which I'm sure of. And I consider it a form of deception and emotional dishonesty. Likewise, I'm sure there are things worse than a surveillance camera.

  • Like 1
Link to post
Share on other sites

When an Ex actually makes contact. Calls or text making small talk. Even going as far as saying they "miss" us. Or miss talking to us and how they miss the friendship that we once had. blah....blah...

 

 

Breadcrumbs to keep us thinking that they might have a change of heart or filling us up with false hope.

Link to post
Share on other sites
HeartOfAPhoenix

A few weeks ago I met her by coincidence and she tried to ignore me as good as she could. A few days later, she liked a picture of me on Instagram and yesterday I got a notification that she followed me on Instagram, but when I checked it wasn't the case. So she is checking my profile and pressed 'follow' by mistake I guess, after which she directly unfollowed me.

 

I agree with Chi townD for the most part. If this were a fresh breakup then yes I would consider this a breadcrumb with her trying to string you along. But it's been over a year and I think her seeing you peaked her curiosity.

 

However... I don't think she "accidentally" clicked follow on your instagram. I've never accidentally added someone as a friend when I had myspace, facebook, or any other social media. I suspect her relationship isn't as great as she's putting out there just like everyone else in the cloud. I suspect that she's looking to get a reaction out of you, get you to break no contact, but not in the hopes of reconciliation.

  • Like 1
Link to post
Share on other sites
  • Author
However... I don't think she "accidentally" clicked follow on your instagram. I've never accidentally added someone as a friend when I had myspace, facebook, or any other social media. I suspect her relationship isn't as great as she's putting out there just like everyone else in the cloud. I suspect that she's looking to get a reaction out of you, get you to break no contact, but not in the hopes of reconciliation.

 

I tend to agree with this. She wants me to give in, but I will never do that because I would be just messing with myself. She wants my attention and see if I am still attached to her...

 

I still believe there will be a day when she somewhat regrets what she has done or how she has done it, but I think everyone comes to that point at some moment in time.

Link to post
Share on other sites
×
×
  • Create New...