babylola Posted January 27, 2015 Share Posted January 27, 2015 (edited) We broke up 3 months ago...he said he fell out of love with me. There were alot of reasons why...however...he also says he doesnt want to lose me, its vital that we remain friends, im incredibly important to him. Im the only girl hes ever loved, he still thinks im stunning, he doesnt like the thought of me with someone else,and he will always feel something for me... henalso said when i asked about gettin back together that, he couldnt go back, and, he couldnt do what im asking of him right now, he doesnt think it would work. he wants to remain in contact and promises he wont forget about me, he also said he will never let anyone get in the way of us being in contact and iff any girl ever has a problem with him talking to me they can "f**k off".... confusing stuff. help ? Edited January 27, 2015 by a LoveShack.org Moderator Clarify title and merge duplicate threads Link to post Share on other sites
evanescentworld Posted January 27, 2015 Share Posted January 27, 2015 Do not - I REPEAT - DO NOT - agree to stay in touch with him. His motives are entirely self-serving and selfish. He won't go out with you, but refuses to let you go? What IS his problem?? No, you can't be expected to do this, he shouldn't even ask - let alone demand - it. And how disrespectful and rude will that be to any new GF? Absolutely not. Cut off all contact. he's on an ego-boosting exercise and will do nothing but feed you breadcrumbs. Don't subject your poor loving heart to this. He will merely crush it underfoot, time and time again. Go complete, total No Contact - cut him off in every single way possible, and do not entertain any attempts on his part to snare you back in. 5 Link to post Share on other sites
evanescentworld Posted January 27, 2015 Share Posted January 27, 2015 (He's being such an unreasonable pig, I don't really understand what you're confused about...) He does not wants you but feels nobody else can have you, either....? Really?? 2 Link to post Share on other sites
seminoles84 Posted January 27, 2015 Share Posted January 27, 2015 He wants you as his backup plan. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
dumbass2 Posted January 27, 2015 Share Posted January 27, 2015 Mixed signals are always a clear sign to stay far away. It's hard to do because they are purposely doing this to confuse you and keep you around for their selfish reasons. The reason to keep you around is not to get back together. He has said that much. you can't be friends. He doesn't feel close to the way you do about him. 4 Link to post Share on other sites
KBarletta Posted January 27, 2015 Share Posted January 27, 2015 he doesnt like the thought of me with someone else He doesn't like the thought of you with someone else, but he wants to remain friends? Doesn't sound like a good idea. Sounds like he wants you as a plan B. This wouldn't be fair to you or to whoever you end up with next to have a friend who is an ex boyfriend who has said he doesn't want you to be with anyone else. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
Satu Posted January 27, 2015 Share Posted January 27, 2015 Have nothing to do with this guy. He's a nasty piece of work. He doesn't love or care about you. Avoid like the plague. No contact. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
Zahara Posted January 27, 2015 Share Posted January 27, 2015 Plan B. Fallback girl. All that BS talk about how he'll tell another girl to f off is a bunch of words fed to you to make you feel so special that you'll sit there on the backburner. 4 Link to post Share on other sites
LovelyDaze Posted January 27, 2015 Share Posted January 27, 2015 Oh wow. There's not one piece of advice I didn't enthusiastically love (That's when i "like" something anyway ) Look, you are indeed being feed the proverbially breadcrumbs here by your ex. Why he doesn't want to see you with someone else isn't for any type of sentimental reason, it's so that you don't fall in love with someone who WILL fall in love with you and treat you right. Your ex is at least smart enough to know that will happen to you if you are gone. See yourself as highly valuable to where a guy would never even think of hurting you or confusing you like this. A guy that loves you would treat you like a best friend...not a frenemy. It will be hard but PLEASE send him on his way so he doesn't mindscrew you into being his backup plan. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Author babylola Posted January 28, 2015 Author Share Posted January 28, 2015 I just find it hard to believe he wojld be that way. Ive not even seen him in 3 months and i dont intend on doing. But he was there for me a hell of a lat last year and i think thats why im finding it hard to let go. Link to post Share on other sites
Kermit007 Posted January 28, 2015 Share Posted January 28, 2015 I just find it hard to believe he wojld be that way. Ive not even seen him in 3 months and i dont intend on doing. But he was there for me a hell of a lat last year and i think thats why im finding it hard to let go. It's normal you find it hard to let go. He was a big part of your life. Like all of the other people here i'm going to give you the same advice. Move on and go No Contact. He is just playing with your feelings, telling you all kind of BS so he makes sure you won't move on. Think about it, if he would really think the world of you, he would be with you. The fact that he is not with you, is because he wants to see other people. He says he loves you and would hate the fact you would be with someone else. Why isn't he with you then ?? That does not make sense! Don't believe that when he has a new GF and she tells him to stop contacting you, he will reply to her that he cant do that. The moment he has someone new, you will probably not hear from him anymore. He is keeping you as backup, nothing more, nothing less. The moment he finds someone, you'll be out of the picture. I know it' hard to understand but at some time in your life you will look back at our comments above and say to yourself "Ofcourse, they were right!" Right now...you just seeing what you want tot see Link to post Share on other sites
David87 Posted January 28, 2015 Share Posted January 28, 2015 I just find it hard to believe he wojld be that way. Ive not even seen him in 3 months and i dont intend on doing. But he was there for me a hell of a lat last year and i think thats why im finding it hard to let go. Why do you find it so hard to let go when he already did LET YOU GO ! Link to post Share on other sites
kendahke Posted January 28, 2015 Share Posted January 28, 2015 We broke up 3 months ago...he said he fell out of love with me. There were alot of reasons why...however...he also says he doesnt want to lose me, its vital that we remain friends, im incredibly important to him. Im the only girl hes ever loved, he still thinks im stunning, he doesnt like the thought of me with someone else,and he will always feel something for me... henalso said when i asked about gettin back together that, he couldnt go back, and, he couldnt do what im asking of him right now, he doesnt think it would work. he wants to remain in contact and promises he wont forget about me, he also said he will never let anyone get in the way of us being in contact and iff any girl ever has a problem with him talking to me they can "f**k off".... confusing stuff. help ? Take back control of your life and your destiny. If you don't want to be demoted to "really good friend" status, then end this and go No Contact. Let him go walk it off or open up a can of "act right". He's telling you already that he is making space in his intimacy and feelings for a new girl, but he wants to put the idea of you before her? O. M. G. It's up to you if you can stomach listening to him talking about a new love. I know I'd drop him off at the mall and keep going. Link to post Share on other sites
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