Mixed signals

[Torxx12]

Basically my Gf dumped me 3 months ago over arguments and she said she had mixed feelings and didnt wanna be with me anymore. I was devastated and did all the things your not suppose to do, txting, calling, that kinda stuff, she pretty much ignored me.

 

So i did the no contact thing for a month and she never made an effort to contact me but i could see her post things on her social network saying how lonely she is and wut not (never rly directing anything to me specifically).

 

When the month was done i decided to txt her and see how everything was. She always answers my txts now and kinda makes conversation but otherwise dead silence if i dont make the first move.

 

I recently went to a friends lil house party where she went as well and i could see her watching me and smile when we would lock eyes, after she had a few drinks where she loosened up she was practically all over me, leaning against me, hugging me, nothing intimate though.

 

The next day i txt her and shes apologizing saying she shouldnt of been so "touchy", blaming it on the alcohol even though she wasnt smashed i feel like she knew what she was doin. So i asked her if she still has feeling for me she said i dunno, i asked her if 1 day she could see us getting back together she said i thought about it but i dunno.

 

Im so confused i dunno what to do i still love her but i feel like she cares and at the same time doesnt. I see her a few days a week at a restaurant i go to with my boss and i can see her watching me sometimes and smiling when i look at her, but yet doesnt wanna be with me. Is she just being nice? Is she confused about what she wants? Is she playing hard to get?

 

What do you guys think

[Halcyon]

Mixed feelings when she broke up with you is she didn't have the courage to tell you she had fallen out of love with you, sorry.

 

She pays you attention because she is lonely but she knows she does not want to be with you anymore.

 

She is not playing hard to get, she is not confused. You need to move on.

[dyna85]

Honestly, I hate to comment, because I don't want this to come off as crushing or hurtful, because I totally get that you are hurting from this breakup, and rightfully so! However, these are not mixed signals, my dear. The signal is loud and clear and flashing red, and spelled out with a big NO. She broke up with you and made no effort to get back in touch, even after you tried to resolve the conflict with her? Well... it's high time you recognize that you need to move on and unless she's blowing up your phone/email/whatever, consider it a lost cause. I'm all for the guy making an effort to salvage what's about to be lost, but it sounds like you already went there (you said you did all the things you're not supposed to do and she ignored you).

 

I would focus on yourself at this point. I know it's going to be hard, because you may miss her and the memories of her may surface, but you have to try, because that ship has sunk, sailed, whatever. Her attention is elsewhere and you don't deserve to play second fiddle to anyone. You have a life for a reason and your purpose is extremely important, and you need to take care of YOU now. You tried to make it work.. which is good of you. However, she wasn't willing to contribute. Relationships require two people to make a choice to make it work. She's made her choice to leave you hanging, so screw that ish and move along. It's gotta be done. It's just a part of life. Move on and some day you will look back and be better off with someone better suited to you.

 

Everything happens for a reason.

[kenmore]

she wasn't willing to contribute. Relationships require two people to make a choice to make it work. She's made her choice to leave you hanging, so screw that ish and move along. It's gotta be done. It's just a part of life. Move on and some day you will look back and be better off with someone better suited to you.

 

Everything happens for a reason.

 

I couldn't have said it better myself.

 

I always look for the repliers who try to put new people "in their boat" by making sure they can't have what they don't have (if you get my drift.) People who try to nay-say reconciliation or peace talks because they can't have them. This post speaks truth to me from an outside perspective.

 

Sorry to have to agree, but it's most likely time to move on. The sooner the better. I'm sorry.

[Torxx12]

I dunno i feel as if you guys are wrong, this girl is very stubborn and has the most pride ive ever seen anyone have.

 

Also when i see her in person her attitude changes a little bit like she gets a little sad and i can read her eyes like something is wrong cause they get all glosy and her voice changes.

 

Plus her mom calls me sometimes cause she likes me and wants us to get back together and that apparently she told her aunt she still loves me. So trust me when i say this girl is complicated. You may be right shes not interested, but when i see her, her body language tells me otherwise, as if shes confused

[Simon Phoenix]

I dunno i feel as if you guys are wrong, this girl is very stubborn and has the most pride ive ever seen anyone have.

 

Also when i see her in person her attitude changes a little bit like she gets a little sad and i can read her eyes like something is wrong cause they get all glosy and her voice changes.

 

Plus her mom calls me sometimes cause she likes me and wants us to get back together and that apparently she told her aunt she still loves me. So trust me when i say this girl is complicated. You may be right shes not interested, but when i see her, her body language tells me otherwise, as if shes confused

 

If I had a dollar for everyone who thought their situation was different, I'd own this website. I have to agree with everyone else that you are reading way too far into things to try to feed your hope. I don't care how stubborn she is, if she loves you she'll let you know. Not her mom, not her aunt, not her friends, she will. And stop talking to the mom -- that's not going to help your cause at all. Her mom is her confidant, not yours.

[Elle1975]

"Mixed signals" never are good news. Loud and clear messages "I want to be with you" are the kind of messages that you want to get.

 

"I don't know" means "no".

[EgoJoe]

Stop initiating. She was all over you because she's still attracted to you but not attached.

 

 

Do you, remove from Facebook and move on. Stop taking her mother's phone call. Her mother is trying to keep you around because she knows probably from personal experience or inside info that her daughter is going to want/need a soft landing.

 

 

Gather your self respect and move on. If she hangs on to you again, make a move on her without any relationship talk just be you and attractive etc.

 

 

She will likely reciprocate and if/when you do the deed, leave quickly and don't call her. The wake up call will be real.

[Torxx12]

i figured id ask and give a little update, but about a week after new yrs she finally txted me first at 11pm saying "why didnt you wish me happy new yr" i didnt respond till 2pm the next day saying " i did that that time i was at ur dads bakery?"

 

She then responded with "im sorry i was drunk last nite i shouldnt of had my phone with me" i didnt bother answering her back after that.

 

My question is why she playing these games with me? ive gotten drunk a few times after our break up and even i never txted/drunk called her, and she dumped me.

 

I have deleted her from all social media for a while now but ive seen that she still follows me on instagram/twitter

 

Is she just checking up on me? I'd say im somewhat over her cause ive hooked up with other girls since then but at the same time it makes me wonder why now she decided to txt me

[Halcyon]

She's tugging on the leash to see if you are still there. She hasn't asked you anything of importance. The answer you gave is "yes, I'm still here". Don't contact her if all she is asking is pointless questions.