Cerebral Posted November 28, 2014 Share Posted November 28, 2014 What do I do when my gf asks for space and to be alone for a while? But when I ask if she giving up on us she doesn't acknowledge it? Or if I say, so if you want to be done so be it, she doesn't acknowledge that either? I've agreed to her space it's just frustrating not to know if I should wait around or not. Any ideas? Link to post Share on other sites
Firestarter1069 Posted November 28, 2014 Share Posted November 28, 2014 What do I do when my gf asks for space and to be alone for a while? But when I ask if she giving up on us she doesn't acknowledge it? Or if I say, so if you want to be done so be it, she doesn't acknowledge that either? I've agreed to her space it's just frustrating not to know if I should wait around or not. Any ideas? This recently happened to me. She asked me to move in with her at the end of October. On October 1st she tells me she needs space to get herself right. Well about a month later she told me she thought she was ready for a relationship but she needs to be alone. All the future plans we had reduced to absolutely nothing. Do yourself a favor, DON'T wait like I did, it's painful and one of, if not the worst moments of my life. You'd think once you hit 40 years old things like this wouldn't happen....wow was I wrong. Link to post Share on other sites
Invictus01 Posted November 28, 2014 Share Posted November 28, 2014 When a woman asks for space, give her enough space to become an astronaut... that is the only move you got here. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Cerebral Posted November 28, 2014 Author Share Posted November 28, 2014 That's what I am doing. This all happened last week. Everything was great. she just found out I had a place with my previous gf, I was still on a lease with. I was not staying there... But did neglect to tell her because I didn't want any drama. Also; she asked "to be left alone for a while", not, "be alone". Thanks Link to post Share on other sites
Ecko08 Posted November 28, 2014 Share Posted November 28, 2014 What you had was a failure to communicate. Learn from it. Link to post Share on other sites
Firestarter1069 Posted November 28, 2014 Share Posted November 28, 2014 That's what I am doing. This all happened last week. Everything was great. she just found out I had a place with my previous gf, I was still on a lease with. I was not staying there... But did neglect to tell her because I didn't want any drama. Also; she asked "to be left alone for a while", not, "be alone". Thanks Mine told me she "needs to be alone for now". We never had one fight, neither one of us have been in a serious relationship for 4 years, and she's been very independent for those 4 years. She dated a few guys during those 4 years but nothing made it past 2 months. I took it as she needs to be single. Worst part is we were best friends for over a year before we started dating and now we don't even have that anymore. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Cerebral Posted November 28, 2014 Author Share Posted November 28, 2014 I see as being alone and being left alone as two different things though. Being alone sounds like being single. Being left alone means space. I would think anyways. Link to post Share on other sites
Frank2thepoint Posted November 28, 2014 Share Posted November 28, 2014 That's what I am doing. This all happened last week. Everything was great. she just found out I had a place with my previous gf, I was still on a lease with. I was not staying there... But did neglect to tell her because I didn't want any drama. Also; she asked "to be left alone for a while", not, "be alone". Thanks She wants space to think about the relationship and if she can trust you. The irony of you not being honest with your girlfriend is that you ended up creating drama. For future reference, always be upfront and honest to avoid looking like you are hiding something. Building trust and communicating is very important for a relationship. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Cerebral Posted November 28, 2014 Author Share Posted November 28, 2014 I know I am regretting it so much. She had trust issues in the first place. What an idiot I am. We litterally had everything going for us. its like we never actually broke up she just, she's just reiterated her need for space and to be left alone for a 'while'. Which I am trying so hard to do, and don't know what the timeframe would be on a 'while'. She left to be with her parents on Wednesday till Sunday. Link to post Share on other sites
Frank2thepoint Posted November 28, 2014 Share Posted November 28, 2014 She had trust issues in the first place. My recent ex-girlfriend is insecure, and she had trust issues too due to her previous relationships. She ended our promising relationship over misinterpreted text messages. Being with someone that has trust issues is a precarious relationship, because any small thing can set the person off. Regardless, at this point for you, just give her space and leave her be. Don't focus on what "a while" means. Give her a week, if she doesn't contact you, then reach out to her and take it from there. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Cerebral Posted November 28, 2014 Author Share Posted November 28, 2014 Definately. I figure she is thinking about everything, I was so close to texting her this: "I miss you, this is hard for me, do you think I should just move on?" So I could get a response out of her and frankly make it easier for me. So I'm not thinking about what's going on this whole time... I didn't send that. I know space is what's best, it's just killing me. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Cerebral Posted November 28, 2014 Author Share Posted November 28, 2014 Definitely. I figure she is thinking about everything, I was so close to texting her this: "I miss you, this is hard for me, do you think I should just move on?" So I could get a response out of her and frankly make it easier for me, So I'm not thinking about what's going on this whole time. I didn't send that though as I know it could push her away. I know space is what's best, it's just killing me. Stuck wanting to text her and then can't bring myself to do it because I don't want to lose her. Link to post Share on other sites
Firestarter1069 Posted November 28, 2014 Share Posted November 28, 2014 Definitely. I figure she is thinking about everything, I was so close to texting her this: "I miss you, this is hard for me, do you think I should just move on?" So I could get a response out of her and frankly make it easier for me, So I'm not thinking about what's going on this whole time. I didn't send that though as I know it could push her away. I know space is what's best, it's just killing me. Stuck wanting to text her and then can't bring myself to do it because I don't want to lose her. I'm not trying to be mean here, but don't do this to yourself, you need to just forget about her. For a month I kept having these visions where mine would just text me and say, "Look, I've had time to think and make myself right. You were right, we really are perfect together". Never happened. In fact November 5th we were texting, she initiated, this was the first time I talked to her since October 7th, in the middle of our conversation which was nothing about us, she says she's a terrible human being. This was when she told me she needs to be alone for now and she was sorry it had to happen to me. I'm sure the only reason she contacted me was to get this out of her system and officially end it. That was the last time I spoke with her and we even work at the same place. Link to post Share on other sites
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