betrayed so very badly

[shreya20]

So, I was with this guy for 7 years. we were in the same college, he was my senior there. To be frank he dated my senior and i had no clue of it when the relationship started. He didnt even break up with her before starting a relationship with me which i got to know recently. He was very charming, sweet, loving to me that I didnt even bother at that time to look into his past. We had a long distance relationship most of the time after 3-4 months when he passed out from the college and got a new job in some other city. He started ignoring me and we had fights but it soon ended and we get back together. I wont say ours was a perfect relationship but we never got apart after fights and usually patched up in a day. Then he went to some other country( by profession he is a doctor and I am a dentist) for his residency 4 years back and i was still waiting my graduation completion. After that i also started preparing to get to the same place so that we could be together. But when i reached there i saw he was dating a gal and was searching match for himself through a matrimonial site. I was devastated. This guy who was so adamant that i should go there and start a career there so that we could be together was cheating on me all thie while when i was preparing and waiting to be with him. We had a serious fight, i cried, he cried and he promised that he will change and has some psychological issues. I gave him chance and went to another state to live with my aunt and gave my exams. all this while we had fights, he started ignoring me on weekends again. I cant explain how he never let me go anywhere and cried in front of me if we tried to breakup. I didnt get into any college, had rejections which i know now beacuse i was so emotionally drained that i couldnt perform well. For him it was my career which mattered because he started calling me looser after the results came out. I used to retaliate everytime but still we remained toegther because i didnt wana loose relationship which was that old. We had so many dreams together which he only showed me but while coming back this time i discovered he was cheating on me again and now was very much serious for that gal that he is getting married to her soon. I hate him so much because he gave me the dreams, i never looked. He was so shameless that 4 days before i caught him he was saying that we will tell our children our love story. I am a very emotional person plus i got so much weak emotionally because i was away from my parents, friends and was facing a bad time careerwise too and he was the only emotional support there in a foreign country. What did he get after doing all this? I hate him but still wonder how he would be treating that other gal( he did a very bad thing he talked to my parents for marriage and backed out after my results). I am trying to get this **** out of my head but when i hear things like marriage, honeymoon, sex, babies- i picturize them doing all those things and i feel robbed and all the way more bitter. Please help people how can i move past these trigger points and still be normal. I want to achieve success careerwise and show him that i am not a looser but cant do it with a mind full of crap and deceiving memories. Please help. i have a very tough exam coming up and i am back in my home country to get into masters

[Fer Goncalves]

Im a engineer and also i finish law school last semester but after my ex break up with me i felt she do it because im not the "the king of party" or the "classroom clown". Im a mature guy of 34 years working for my future I already do certain things that i dont have the necesities to do it again. I surf, but i dont do it anymore because i like other sport know, for example. in the same time i didnt pass the board for law in my state and she has a boyfriend know how is all i not was.

 

I think, that no matter if you passes the test or no he didnt love how you love him. May be he find an excuse because he is a coward and didnt want to tell you that he his love toward maybe moved in another way.

 

You seems a very interesting girl, I think that you will find somebody soon that will fall for you. Let me tell you something, theres is a famous quote in my country that said: "When you are losing your time watching who is infront of you giving you his back, there is other at your side watching you".

 

I like to said my femme friends that if his best friend is a man he is in love with her. Beleive me.

 

Hope you well! Im new on this comment if you want in my quotes!!!

[shreya20]

I dont know he was coward or not but he was materialistic for sure because once i read in one of his chats with his friends when i first caught him and they were talking about the money the gal he wants to be with would be making. He even helped me with the applications but i have seen change in his behavior soon after the results were out but still he was giving me false hopes. He showed me several times his expensive watch when i met him the last time. I am not a very beautiful gal but yeah I am pretty and i said no to several people because i loved only him. My friends say that guy is incapable of loving because he is so selfish that he didnt even acknowledged the fact that during his struggle i was the one who did everything for him, not the other gal. Not only this i did dishes, ironed his clothes, helped him moving, made food for him several times and whats more shocking is he came to meet me on 31st and was kissing my hands all the time and was saying he doesnt know why he behaves like that and he was planning to meet me in our home country( for which he was leaving the next day and i was supposed to leave after 10 days) and revisit our old dating spots. And later i came to know that it was her bday on 31st and he left her home and came to meet me saying he was leaving for emergency and told me that he was coming from hospital and got late there. This i got to know from that gal. I gave him everything but he attacked my self esteem again and again saying several bad things to me. He is so dramatic that he can make you believe that he loves you (believe me he is soo good at it.)". Even if he has someone else he was so in love with her why he kept me hanging all this while and cheating on her too when he was seeing me. I felt so used and so destroyed- i gave my youth into this relationship and got betryal. Infact what hurts me the most are his last emails where he was blaming me for telling things to her now gf( whom i contacted to know the truth myself). He was not even one percent apologetic, he was shameless. he said he kept the relationship with him out of pity and he loved her from past two years. So why he was talking about future with me all this while simulatneoulsy balming me for fights when i snapped back at him for being out of touch during weekends without saying anything( he used to be with her at that time). Life would have been simpler if he would have broken up with me. What wrong i did to him that he wanted me all destroyed ? there are so many questions juggling in my mind to which i will never get any answers.