CaliBabe Posted November 24, 2014 Share Posted November 24, 2014 So it happened. After my ex left me for a woman he knew for only a few days, he finally contacted me. I was so wonderful to my ex. I had his back when he was going through many life changes such as losing his home, his job, his car and through getting over a drug addiction. I stood by him, through thick and thin. I proved my loyalty by sticking by him and being a supportive girlfriend and encouraging him to go after his dreams... He also, showed me his loyalty. He left me. After 2.5 years, he left me for a stranger. He paraded his happy new shiny relationship on social media, while I took the high road. I didn't show an ounce of weakness. No begging, no pleading, no social media retaliation. I never spoke to him again after he told me. I just moved forward, tried my best to heal the right way with lots of therapy and being very kind to myself. As a woman, it would be very easy for me to find a replacement, a new man to make me feel better about myself, to not feel lonely, one to show off on social media, but I did not do this. I stayed single, dated casually, but did not parade anything on social media. I could handle being alone. For months, I cried, I was pained that the man that I love, whom I supported and loved even through difficult times could betray me and leave our special bond behind. After 3.5 months, I am proud to say that I am in a much better place and feel very proud of how far I have come. I spend alot of time working, building my future, spending time with family and friends and just enjoying my own company. Just the other day, I received a text from my ex. In the text he tells me that I am a great woman and that he totally screwed up with me and that he will never find another like me. He apologized for hurting me and hopes I found happiness. I always hoped this day would come. If you look at my previous posts, I wanted this day so badly. And here it is. ...I did not respond. He does not deserve the pleasure of hearing my voice or being in my presence ever again. I am the one that got away, and he can live with that. I just wanted to come and update as I know not many people do. Love you all at LS. 29 Link to post Share on other sites
metaversus Posted November 25, 2014 Share Posted November 25, 2014 "Every new broom sweeps good." 2 Link to post Share on other sites
broken77 Posted November 25, 2014 Share Posted November 25, 2014 You're an inspiration. I've been trolling these boards for years and this is the most proud I've been 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Omei Posted November 25, 2014 Share Posted November 25, 2014 Good for you =D thanks for sharing! Good read 1 Link to post Share on other sites
HowMightI-live Posted November 25, 2014 Share Posted November 25, 2014 That was an invigorating read. You may have lost a relationship, but it sure does seem clear to me that you're finding something better in the process, yourself. Oh, what a journey you're in for and the most important one at that. Stay strong. 4 Link to post Share on other sites
Arieswoman Posted November 25, 2014 Share Posted November 25, 2014 CaliBabe, That was a great post, kudos to you, you have real class ! 2 Link to post Share on other sites
mtnbiker3000 Posted November 25, 2014 Share Posted November 25, 2014 I know you've been around here a while. Much longer than 3.5 months. I am assuming this was a new(er) relationship and not the one that brought you here? Did you originally come her for someone else, years ago?? Link to post Share on other sites
Author CaliBabe Posted November 25, 2014 Author Share Posted November 25, 2014 You're an inspiration. I've been trolling these boards for years and this is the most proud I've been Broken77, that means so much to me. Thank you. Link to post Share on other sites
Author CaliBabe Posted November 25, 2014 Author Share Posted November 25, 2014 That was an invigorating read. You may have lost a relationship, but it sure does seem clear to me that you're finding something better in the process, yourself. Oh, what a journey you're in for and the most important one at that. Stay strong. Thank you for the positive words. Yes, I have learned so much and this journey is quite amazing. I feel so very alive. You spend your whole life looking for that one person to make you happy and complete, never realizing that one person is YOU! 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author CaliBabe Posted November 25, 2014 Author Share Posted November 25, 2014 I know you've been around here a while. Much longer than 3.5 months. I am assuming this was a new(er) relationship and not the one that brought you here? Did you originally come her for someone else, years ago?? mtnbiker3000, also an LS veteran I see. Yes I came to this site many years ago. I came for the "one that got away". He moved away to go to college and I was going to school also and starting a business, we were long distance. We couldn't make it work with our schedules and making time and ended our relationship amicably and with love and respect. This last relationship lasted 2.5 going on 3 years before I was left. Biggest mistake of his life. One thing I take great pride in is how I handled myself. No begging, no pleading, just left with my head held high and completely disappeared. I love that he realized my worth (although way too late) completely on his own. It is so much more meaningful for him to realize on his own, without me saying anything. I would never say that this validates me, I would call it more of redemption... Of all the pain I went through. I now know that although it was me hurting in the beginning, he is hurting in the end. My ex and I are both very prideful people, so I can only imagine how much he had to humble himself to send me that message. I feel so... Vindicated. Like the universe really does come full circle. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
Chi townD Posted November 25, 2014 Share Posted November 25, 2014 HEY CALIBABE!!!! Good for you! I'm so proud of the confidence that you got back! This is truly inspiring! Keep moving forward! Keep making positive changes! You are doing SO awesome right now! 1 Link to post Share on other sites
LifeNomad Posted November 25, 2014 Share Posted November 25, 2014 hi Cali im happy for you, I wish you the best! You are an inspiration to me as well! 1 Link to post Share on other sites
mammasita Posted November 25, 2014 Share Posted November 25, 2014 BRAVO! ten char 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Feelbettersoon Posted November 25, 2014 Share Posted November 25, 2014 I too long for this text. well done for staying so strong 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author CaliBabe Posted November 25, 2014 Author Share Posted November 25, 2014 I can't thank LS enough and all the members who come and give advice. I have learned so much not just from those who posted on my threads but all of those who have posted and the members who have taken the time to respond to those who needed help. I have learned from all of you. LS is a great support and people really do care. I have always tried to pay it forward and give support and sometimes (when necessary) blunt advice. I encourage everyone to continue to come here for support and I want to personally thank everyone who has been so honest and taken the time out of their day to help myself and others, kudos to you! Link to post Share on other sites
lemonsugar Posted November 25, 2014 Share Posted November 25, 2014 I want to be where you are In a few months so inspiring Broke down tonight saying why I feel so bad. Think my pride hurts putting up with being told I'm just this. Il never get into X. Not being worth the time to see after hospital. Even the break up was I've seen you at your worst after hospital and I can't deal with that. It was always about him and how he was better than me. I've lost my confidence but I finally see why it hurt so much. Not the loss of him but the loss of who I am and my happiness. I hurt so much but I now see why and can work out a way through Link to post Share on other sites
Author CaliBabe Posted November 25, 2014 Author Share Posted November 25, 2014 I want to be where you are In a few months so inspiring Broke down tonight saying why I feel so bad. Think my pride hurts putting up with being told I'm just this. Il never get into X. Not being worth the time to see after hospital. Even the break up was I've seen you at your worst after hospital and I can't deal with that. It was always about him and how he was better than me. I've lost my confidence but I finally see why it hurt so much. Not the loss of him but the loss of who I am and my happiness. I hurt so much but I now see why and can work out a way through Girl, I can totally relate. I really questioned myself, my worth. I felt so disposable. However, eventhough I felt these things I never let my ex see this. Or anyone other than my very close friends, family and therapist. You have to really really nuture yourself. You have to rebuild your confidence. Eff everything else at this point. You will be in a better place but you will get there faster if you are proactive in your healing. Let me know if I can help you in any way. Link to post Share on other sites
jackinthebox1 Posted November 26, 2014 Share Posted November 26, 2014 This is ****ing brilliant. Well done you and **** you to the guy who walked away. It gets so hard on here to give advice when no one seems to want to listen or accept what has happened to them. It isnt a syndrome, they aren't pondering when to get back with you. They just handed you your heart in your lap and walked out. Done. You did exactly the right thing and now you are out of a bad relationship with some jackass who can't make his mind up and you will soon be finding the man of your dreams. And you don't put up with ****. We need more women like that or us men will just play with your feelings however we see fit. Well done sister. I hope everyone can take solice in this post and man (or woman) up and get on with their ****ing lives while we are all still here. Dont drink bad coffee and dont shed a single tear on someone who doesn't give a **** about you. And save the drama for your mama! Link to post Share on other sites
sam_999 Posted November 26, 2014 Share Posted November 26, 2014 Its crazy how my situation look like yours except for the fact that i didnt recived no text or any news from her after 3 month Link to post Share on other sites
JCG Posted November 27, 2014 Share Posted November 27, 2014 It happened today for me as well!! And I feel so empowered! After 15 days of no contact, he contacted me. It felt so great to delete the text and not send a reply! Thank you for this site! Link to post Share on other sites
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