Unsure420 Posted November 21, 2014 Share Posted November 21, 2014 (edited) I will try and make this as short as possible. I'm 28 and she's 28. We've been dating for 3 years and living together for 3 years. My brother is married to her cousin so this has family ties as well. We have an apartment together cars together dog etc. make a long story short our relationship has always been very strong. Very open about our feelings always wanted to be with eachother our sex was great, we talked about marriage, children, grownjng old all that. I went back to school to get my Cdl and she recently got hired as a dispatcher so are money is not an issue. She found messages on face book of me talking to other girls nothing sexual just a friendly convo with old friends and one of them happen to be an ex gf. Well when I got out of work she had eveething printed out and told me she no longer lives here she doesn't want to be with me I broke her heart etc. now this was over a month ago. And after pleading for forgiveness eventually she agreed she wanted to work out the relationship and take things very slow to build my trust back. But in that span of time I had an extremly hard time with the separation and not being able to sleep in bed with her and be in her everyday activities. In my head she was taking it to far and even tho things were getting better ultimately I just wanted her to come home. In the mist of one of the last arguments she told me that i will never put my self in her shoes in this situation and I don't respect how she feels. That it's always about how I feel. I shouldn't have to constantly worry about when I'm going to see her again and where she is she should be home with me and we fix it together but she still hasn't budged. so I left her with this. "I just want you to know something, and I'm going to be honest with you. I know in your head you'll never think I will put my self in your shoes in this situation,And I don't respect how you feel.the only way you'll realize that i do is by me letting go. I love you that much that I'm willing to let you go to show you that this isn't about me. Just because I'm hurting doesn't mean I should force you to come home. Or we should force this relationship. I really hope one day you will find it in your heart and see that everything I'm doing now is real love and understanding. you are always going to hold the key to my heart. And I will pray everyday that the switch in your head turns off and one day we will be together again. I'll see you around pretty". Bascially I'm trying to prove to her by letting her go that I am putting my self in her shoes and I respect her feelings for why she's doing what she's doing. Because I think she hasn't came back yet because she thinks that I think its all about me. I believe this is an ultimate sacrifice of love that I'm willing to let go of what could happen to prove my love and understanding of her feelings. Any input would be great to help me wth this alll thanks guys.. Any questions I'd love to answer. Edited November 21, 2014 by a LoveShack.org Moderator Paragraphs Link to post Share on other sites
Vices-Virtues Posted November 21, 2014 Share Posted November 21, 2014 Personally I think if you loved someone you would fight for them not let them go. In her head she may be thinking that the reason you left her was because there's someone else.. Because a lot of people bs about doing it for the relationship and in the end it was because there was someone else... Link to post Share on other sites
Author Unsure420 Posted November 21, 2014 Author Share Posted November 21, 2014 I didn't leave she left me!! She moved out.. I've been sitting around putting my life on hold waiting for and pleading for her to come back. She told me that I don't respect her feelings. Me letting go is proving to her that I'm willing to let her go for good to show her I respect her feelings and understand why she's doing what shes doing... Link to post Share on other sites
Vices-Virtues Posted November 21, 2014 Share Posted November 21, 2014 Is there any chance that there is someone else?? Link to post Share on other sites
Author Unsure420 Posted November 21, 2014 Author Share Posted November 21, 2014 I don't think so. Why would we hang out and still kiss and be all lovey dovey and her tell me she loves me etc Link to post Share on other sites
Vices-Virtues Posted November 21, 2014 Share Posted November 21, 2014 To keep you around just in case the other guy doesn't work.. Or because she's trying to make a decision you or him. That's if there is someone else.. Otherwise idk. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Unsure420 Posted November 21, 2014 Author Share Posted November 21, 2014 This is all happening in less then a month.. She got pissed from what she saw and packed her **** and left. First week we argued second week we started hanging out. I can almost gurantree this isn't about another guy Link to post Share on other sites
LifeNomad Posted November 21, 2014 Share Posted November 21, 2014 sometimes you do have to fight, sometimes you have to let go. sometimes her the other partners feelings have gone to the point there is really nothing you can do, but wait and see if she comes around. If you feel you have done everything you could do, then let her go. expect the worse and hope for the best. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
mightycpa Posted November 21, 2014 Share Posted November 21, 2014 (edited) I don't think you do know how she feels. I don't. I can't imagine getting all worked up over what you described, and then blowing up three years over something so trivial. Apparently, neither can you. If you get back together, my prediction is that she will eventually flake out on you over something else that is just as trivial. Maybe what you should tell her is that she's at fault here, not you, and what you've come to realize is that you can't understand how she would flush what you had down the toilet over a conversation, and that while your heart may disagree for right now, your mind tells you that you're going to be a lot happier without that kind of bull**** melodrama in your life. At least that's what I'd go with. **** her. Edited November 21, 2014 by mightycpa Link to post Share on other sites
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