It wasn't easy at first, but it will be someday.

[Mondmellonw]

Hi everyone! I see a lot of new members on here and many of you might not know a thing about why I came here on the first place.

 

I want to tell you how things have evolved/changed in my life and perspective of things. It's been almost a year since my break up (just two months left).

 

I am 20 years old. The person that brought me here wasn't my first relationship, but it was my first love. I broke up with him due to his disloyalty (talking to his ex behind my back and hanging out with his girl friends, also behind my back) and drinking issues (mostly.., but there were other things). My problem at first was denial. I didn't wanted to break up with him. It wasn't clear to me if he really had drinking issues. It wasn't clear to me if he cheated or not. Everything was ambiguous. He was 26 at the time, so he was ready to settle down with me. Or at least those were his words.

 

The day I broke up with him he insulted me. Said I was mentally ill and many other stuff like that (I never cheated on him or did anything major. Of course I had mistakes, but nothing to be called this way by the person I thought reciprocated my love). And he immediately started dating one friend of mine. It was hard to digest, but I had to cut any contact after some months passed by.

 

He eventually searched for me to tell me I was the one, the love of his life. I agreed to talk to him and he even admitted to me that after I broke up with him he slept with the same ex he contacted while with me (this ex multiple cheated on him). And just a few days after this happened he told me he didn't loved me anymore. Even when I wasn't planning on take him back, his instability about something so important made me distrust him and think that leaving was the best choice I could ever had made. So I asked him to never contact me again.

 

He hasn't contacted me, and I hope he won't do it.

I recently got into a new relationship (I didn't dated anyone for months and months because I wasn't over him, but after some time I felt ready and found a really good guy) and he contacted my best friend to tell her that he did love me. (Wait, what?). Sometimes I still think that maybe he hurted me so I couldn't hurt him. But only he knows what else he was hiding from me... Because I know for sure he lied and hid many things.

 

I didn't wrote my story with full detail, but I really want to say to you that it does gets better with time and effort, no matter how bad the experience was, no matter how much you loved them. I personally think that the more horrible things they do, the easier it will eventually get for you to be over them.

 

And... Personal growth after a break up will be your best choice.

[Haydn]

Hi Mond,

 

Nice post.

[Mondmellonw]

Hey Haydn, long time no "see".

Thank you.

[Andersan]

I didn't wrote my story with full detail, but I really want to say to you that it does gets better with time and effort, no matter how bad the experience was, no matter how much you loved them. I personally think that the more horrible things they do, the easier it will eventually get for you to be over them.