Broke NC, mistake. !

[heartache25]

Ok, so i'm 2 weeks into NC, and i made an account an emailed my ex. DAMN

 

I said- " Hey, how are you"

 

She replied "Who is it"?

 

"Jay is that you"

 

To which i ignored as i instantly realised it was a mistake!

 

Then she sent another one saying "Are you taking the p!ss jay?!?!?!

 

Because i ignored her, but i havnt said it was me, can i get out of this and continue NC?

[Lingo1]

Ok, so i'm 2 weeks into NC, and i made an account an emailed my ex. DAMN

 

I said- " Hey, how are you"

 

She replied "Who is it"?

 

"Jay is that you"

 

To which i ignored as i instantly realised it was a mistake!

 

Then she sent another one saying "Are you taking the p!ss jay?!?!?!

 

Because i ignored her, but i havnt said it was me, can i get out of this and continue NC?

 

Ouch that feeeling i know it hurts bad just dont reply just leave it alone and vanish continue your no contact

[heartache25]

I want to reply to her and say "Yeah it's me how are you"

 

But i know she will repy with something along the lines of "I've told you its over" straight off the bat, which i don't want to hear, although i have accepted its over!,

 

Do you think she knows it is me? I mean. she guessed it was me on 2nd email she sent and then asks if im taking the p!ss, but still i have not replied, she has only a "Hey how are you" under a differnt name than me.

 

Maybe this will make her miss me, i want her to reach out to me after 1 month breakup and 2 week NC!

[Mary Oak]

Leave it alone.

 

You can't make someone miss you by the way.

[heartache25]

Damn, i check my mobile and see that i have 6 missed calls off her on my mobile! what should i do?! Should i ring her back and say it was me? Should i try text her to say "Why are you ringing me" and act like i know nothing about the emails???

 

or act like i am ignoring her calls, and have know knowledge of the emails, help please!

[HeartbrokenNewbie]

Is the email address in your name?

[heartache25]

No the email was under a differnt name but in the first weeks of the breakup, i was emailing her a few times.

 

No one really emails her email address, unless its from work etc.

 

I was dumb and said "Hey, how are you"

 

She instantly knows its me, and thats why i have 6 missed calls.

 

But she has no proof! What should i do?

 

# Ignore the calls from her

# text her phone saying "erm"?

#Or try ring her mobile back

 

I feel she will answer the phone crying and upset, how can i get out of this and make it a way it was not me who sent the email?

 

We broke up 1 month ago this sunday comming, and i am 2 weeks in NC with her

 

DAMNNNNN, i have an voicemail, I SHOULD NOT LISTEN TO THIS OMG my heart is hurting at the thought of listenting to this. but i have to, i know i will regret it

 

Ok so, damn it hurt to hear her voice again. hurt alot. Her voicemail asked why am i emailing her, and that she has rang my phone 4 times and replyed to the email but i am ignoring her as always.....Is pretty much what it said...She wasnt upset, sounded abit sick of me chasing her. SO - to the first question, should i pretend i dont know anything about the email? PLEASE any advice is helpfull

Edited August 20, 2014 by heartache25

[April Moon]

Isn't this what you wanted?? A response? Either respond to her like you initially wanted or don't. It's not okay to play games with people

[heartache25]

Isn't this what you wanted?? A response? Either respond to her like you initially wanted or don't. It's not okay to play games with people

 

So i should respond the the first email?

 

I send the first email from bad feeling, i regreted it, i want to continue NC, she left me.

 

Maybe i should email her back, saying why i sent her the first email, "Oh hey, sorry my net cut out, i got you're voicemail" and then give her some awfull reason to why i emailed her.

 

Like, i missed you and wanted to speak with you

 

ive read not to do that, i am 2 weeks in NC, i sent one email badly, mistake..

[April Moon]

I just read your response and I would strongly encourage you not to respond and ignore that this situation happened. You have already made it two weeks with NC so you can do it again. Please be strong during this time.

[HeartbrokenNewbie]

Im going for ignore too you will only dig this deeper.

 

I dont understand why you didnt use your normal email address if you were going to do that?

[lauri]

Okay, you made a mistake. Don't beat yourself up over this. Look at it like a lesson and realize that you should have never done that.

 

From now on, do not, I repeat, do not contact her again. I can tell that this isn't going to go well if you do...you're creating new accounts (which clearly shows you are in no state of mind to be talking to her) to reach out to her.

 

You gotta pull yourself together and start thinking about you and what steps you need to take to protect yourself from any further pain.

[heartache25]

Damn, i did respond before i read the above comments...I made a totally differnt email account and messaged her saying " Hey, nice voicemail...good to hear your voice, wasnt what i was expecting though. you didnt recieve any emails from me, try your other buddys"

 

It is short and sweet so i can make it out as if i didnt ever email her, i got myself in a hole and i'm getting deeper, i send that email about trying some one else, now i wont reply to anymore and keep NC!

 

I know it is weird me making all these differnt accounts to email her, but i dont want her to know is send that first email, so i had to make a second account to be like "yeah well, this is my account so what you talking about" if you know what i mean, now im going NC again

[lauri]

Damn, i did respond before i read the above comments...I made a totally differnt email account and messaged her saying " Hey, nice voicemail...good to hear your voice, wasnt what i was expecting though. you didnt recieve any emails from me, try your other buddys"

 

It is short and sweet so i can make it out as if i didnt ever email her, i got myself in a hole and i'm getting deeper, i send that email about trying some one else, now i wont reply to anymore and keep NC!

 

I know it is weird me making all these differnt accounts to email her, but i dont want her to know is send that first email, so i had to make a second account to be like "yeah well, this is my account so what you talking about" if you know what i mean, now im going NC again

 

What are you trying to do?

 

Every time you contact her or reach out to her, you're going to appear weak. Good to hear your voice? Try your other buddys? C'mon man...that makes you seem 1) jealous 2) like you aren't over her

 

This is why NC is so important. It allows you to regain your strength and become someone who has a clear mind / conscience when you are put into situations involving your ex. Silence is the biggest indicator of how strong you are. No offense, but right now you aren't strong or even in control of your emotions.

 

My question is to you, what do you want to be ? Weak and pathetic in her eyes? Or a guy who's strong, able to move on and become a better person? I can promise you now that every thing you've done up to this point has validated her feelings for why she has ended it with you rather then questioning her decision.

[heartache25]

I do not understand you. What are you trying to do?

 

Every time you contact her or reach out to her, you're going to appear weak. Good to hear your voice? Try your other buddys? C'mon man...that makes you seem 1) jealous 2) like you aren't over her

 

This is why NC is so important. It allows you to regain your strength and become someone who has a clear mind / conscience when you are put into situations involving your ex. Silence is the biggest indicator of how strong you are. No offense, but right now you aren't strong or even in control of your emotions.

 

My question is to you, what do you want to be ? Weak and pathetic in her eyes? Or a guy who's strong, able to move on and become a better person? I can promise you now that every thing you've done up to this point has validated her feelings for why she has ended it with you rather then questioning her decision.

 

Damn, you are right...Why i said that stuff in that email?? I was trying to play it cool with them words. I am trying to accept it is over, and i should accept it, it has been one month since we split and she tells me not to contact her.

 

I keep hoping that we will get back together some how, i don't know what is wrong with me, i hate it.

 

i said that email to her to make it look like i am over her, not to be like im not, damn im so dumb!!

 

Even after i write this, my mind gets a rediculous thought to resend 1 more email to say that, damn, didnt mean to be rude in other email, just it wasnt me" but the voice mail said "Jay, why are you emailing me still" this is part of it at least. I am trying so hard on NC, i have sent only one email to her, which she knows was me for 100% and that is to tell her, that i didnt send the very first email. So i'm ok! right?! i can just relax, and continue NC

Edited August 20, 2014 by heartache25

[lauri]

Damn, you are right...Why i said that stuff in that email?? I was trying to play it cool with them words. I am trying to accept it is over, and i should accept it, it has been one month since we split and she tells me not to contact her.

 

I keep hoping that we will get back together some how, i don't know what is wrong with me, i hate it.

 

i said that email to her to make it look like i am over her, not to be like im not, damn im so dumb!!

 

Even after i write this, my mind gets a rediculous thought to resend 1 more email to say that, damn, didnt mean to be rude in other email, just it wasnt me" but the voice mail said "Jay, why are you emailing me still" this is part of it at least. I am trying so hard on NC, i have sent only one email to her, which she knows was me for 100% and that is to tell her, that i didnt send the very first email. So i'm ok! right?! i can just relax, and continue NC

 

It's almost like what I said to you didn't sink it...but I don't really expect it to. Why do you care how you came off with her? She broke up with you dude. Do you think being nice to her and sitting around is going to make her change her mind? Every single thing you've done has pushed her further away and made her think you are weak and not a "real man". Do not email her again - if you do I swear its probably going to be the nail in the coffin.

 

And, you are not okay. Do you want any chance of getting back with her? NC is your only hope (although, I hate to tell you, by your actions it may be too late). I'm not saying these things to hurt you more or be too harsh, but I think that you are making some huge mistakes with your ex right now and it needs to stop. Right now. You need to have the mentality it is over forever...and there is no going back. Convince yourself that it is HER loss, not yours.

 

I'm going to assume she is not dumb and probably thinks you're doing stupid things to try to get her attention and get back into her life. Answer me honestly, do you think anything you have done has worked? Think of all of your actions and ask if your ex would want to give a second chance to someone who is so broken, weak, needy and unable to control his emotions?

 

The reasons why she broke up with you haven't changed and won't change over a month. Why don't you spend this time you are spending making fake email accounts in the gym, doing something you enjoy or even travelling? You need to spend time pulling yourself together man.

Edited August 20, 2014 by lauri

[heartache25]

It's almost like what I said to you didn't sink it...but I don't really expect it to. Why do you care how you came off with her? She broke up with you dude. Do you think being nice to her and sitting around is going to make her change her mind? Every single thing you've done has pushed her further away and made her think you are weak and not a "real man". Do not email her again - if you do I swear its probably going to be the nail in the coffin.

 

And, you are not okay. Do you want any chance of getting back with her? NC is your only hope (although, I hate to tell you, by your actions it may be too late). I'm not saying these things to hurt you more or be too harsh, but I think that you are making some huge mistakes with your ex right now and it needs to stop. Right now. You need to have the mentality it is over forever...and there is no going back. Convince yourself that it is HER loss, not yours.

 

I'm going to assume she is not dumb and probably thinks you're doing stupid things to try to get her attention and get back into her life. Answer me honestly, do you think anything you have done has worked? Think of all of your actions and ask if your ex would want to give a second chance to someone who is so broken, weak, needy and unable to control his emotions?

 

The reasons why she broke up with you haven't changed and won't change over a month. Why don't you spend this time you are spending making fake email accounts in the gym, doing something you enjoy or even travelling? You need to spend time pulling yourself together man.

 

Not much sinks into my mind lately sadly, it gets pushed out by other thoughts.

 

You're right, i am pushing her away more and more when i try to contact her, i know it's not making it any better. I just think, maybe she misses me too? but she is to stubborn to message me.

 

I've did the pouring the heart out to her in the early 2 weeks of the brake up, i read up after how much of a mistake that was.

 

Apart of me does want her back, i miss her alot and it's been 1 month and i'm still thinking about her on a daily basis, 100s of times a day. It's exhausting battling them out, in my mind.

 

I've read everywhere, that NC is the best situation but it's sooo hard.

 

Lately i have been getting "Private numbers" calls at late at night, 10-12pm, my mind is sure it is her, just trying to reach out when she is lonely.

 

I answers once at 12am and said "Hello" and there was silence for 10seconds until i hung up. IT MUST OF BEEN HER. That's what made me try to email her again tonight, damn this really sucks and is really hard to do.

[Simon Phoenix]

Dude, settle down. Stop trying to play games, stop trying to guess what she's doing and just go No Contact. You sound insane right now.

[Lingo1]

Damn, you are right...Why i said that stuff in that email?? I was trying to play it cool with them words. I am trying to accept it is over, and i should accept it, it has been one month since we split and she tells me not to contact her.

 

I keep hoping that we will get back together some how, i don't know what is wrong with me, i hate it.

 

i said that email to her to make it look like i am over her, not to be like im not, damn im so dumb!!

 

Even after i write this, my mind gets a rediculous thought to resend 1 more email to say that, damn, didnt mean to be rude in other email, just it wasnt me" but the voice mail said "Jay, why are you emailing me still" this is part of it at least. I am trying so hard on NC, i have sent only one email to her, which she knows was me for 100% and that is to tell her, that i didnt send the very first email. So i'm ok! right?! i can just relax, and continue NC

 

 

U feel sometimes if u send this or do this now she will have a change of mind of the situation but in reality it doesnt change anything i know i have been there for 2months currently all u can do is heal and better yourself i tried my best for 2months and it pushed her away just let fate take the seat she may see if few months or years dam i really messed up dumping him and may come back who knows but u have to heal now:cool:

[todreaminblue]

how about honesty

 

 

hey it was me who emailed you i am sorry i contacted you...i shouldnt have and i regret doing so..it wont happen again...i wish you well....deb

[heartache25]

Being honest got me in the situation im in now. I was honest to her for 4 long years and loyal.

 

Anyhow, she replied to my email of it "Wasnt me, try your other buddys"

 

She said, "I dont know anyone called "Reecesmith". "Can't blame me for thinking it was you. probally spam"

 

So i'm now fighting off the temptation to just try resume some sort of contact with her, ask how she is doing, ask how her new baby nephew is etc.

 

BUT-- I have did to many mistakes already, i will resume NC, although it is hard, she will know that i am ignoring her.

[heartache25]

Was your reason for breaking up well thought out? did you get advice from strangers who don't know the whole story?

 

It saddens me to see how many people around her put so much attention into a break up and so little effort into someone who is in a rough patch. it's like the dealing with a drug addicts, they steal from you and then help your look for it. Thear buzzards circling for the next wreck to watch....

 

 

The breakup with my ex, was overdue from her. Although, everytime we broke up, we got back together. She said she only got back with me cause she felt sorry for me, the last time.

 

Even then, in the first 2 weeks, i put time and attention into trying to get her back, from emails, to going to see her. She wants to breakup, i have no other choice of being in NC with her, or continue to email her as a response, i can probally get some convosation out of her but i know it will end in her blocking me and telling me to leave her alone, to put it down to a tea. I'm here on this site, cause i have no ways of thinking left formyself, so i seek the advice of people around the world

[lolablue17]

I think you are out of control. Now, either you can get some control over yourself, or I would advice you to hurt yourself some more, because maybe you need to hit the bottom very hard, and only then, start building yourself.

 

Her reaction (6 phone calls) means she cares about you. she wants your attention. so give it to her. Tell her it was you sending the mail, you are sorry but it was in a weak a moment because you miss her.

 

Then you might get a nasty response, or a positive one and even she might want you back. each and every option will eventually lead you straight to the bottom - something you probably need in order to gain some control over yourself...

[heartache25]

I think you are out of control. Now, either you can get some control over yourself, or I would advice you to hurt yourself some more, because maybe you need to hit the bottom very hard, and only then, start building yourself.

 

Her reaction (6 phone calls) means she cares about you. she wants your attention. so give it to her. Tell her it was you sending the mail, you are sorry but it was in a weak a moment because you miss her.

 

Then you might get a nasty response, or a positive one and even she might want you back. each and every option will eventually lead you straight to the bottom - something you probably need in order to gain some control over yourself...

 

 

I have cryed many nights of the breakup of me and my ex but that was one month ago. I made a mistake sending her the first email.

 

Now i have made it to her that it wasnt me who sent the email, I would usually tell her that i missed her, when i have, she has told me it's over and i need to accept it. So it is best i keep it at her thinking i didnt send her a email and i have no replied to her email about it being a spam msg....If she wants me, she will ring me, i need to be stronger in my NC

 

6 missed calls, i dunno. She just wanted to shout at me for emailing her probally, i'm glad i didnt see the calls.

[lauri]

I have cryed many nights of the breakup of me and my ex but that was one month ago. I made a mistake sending her the first email.

 

Now i have made it to her that it wasnt me who sent the email, I would usually tell her that i missed her, when i have, she has told me it's over and i need to accept it. So it is best i keep it at her thinking i didnt send her a email and i have no replied to her email about it being a spam msg....If she wants me, she will ring me, i need to be stronger in my NC

 

6 missed calls, i dunno. She just wanted to shout at me for emailing her probally, i'm glad i didnt see the calls.

 

Good I'm glad you aren't reaching out to her.

 

You don't want to be with someone because they feel sorry for you. You want to be with someone because they think you are awesome and worth being with. In the current state that you are in, no girl is going to want to be with you. You are far too weak and out of control. It almost sounds like she thinks you were going to die without her after your last breakup. What garbage.

 

Women want a guy who can control himself and that is confident. You are showing us here that you aren't confident and that you have zero control over your emotions. Start to have some self respect for yourself and leave it alone and become stronger.

 

Even if she was to contact you and say "I want you back", I would respond saying breaking up with someone isn't a joke and that you need time to think to yourself. You need to be able to get to the point where you can make decisions like that.