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My ex boyfriend left for his ex.


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Hey guys, it has been 3 months since my ex boyfriend broke up with me. I am still in the process of moving on and it's getting tougher everyday :(

 

So, I met my ex when we were in high school, when we were both 13 years old. We were both friends but not close friends. So.. we somehow drifted apart and got closer back when we were 17. I have had a crush on him since the day I met him and it was graduation day already, so I decided I would confess to him. However, I was too shy to do so, so I asked my friend to help me. After knowing how I feel about him, he asked me out for a date and we had a great time together. :rolleyes: He asked me out a few days later, and I accepted. We dated for a year and 3 months. I was always very insecure because he used to have things going on with this girl that I'm friends with. They dated briefly before but she ended up choosing another guy over him.. He was honest about this with me so I trusted him. Towards the end of our relationship, I found out that he and her got in contact again.. And he snatched his phone away from me because he was afraid I would see it. He kept insisting that they were friends. We got into a huge argument and that was during his exam period.. so he broke up with me. He told me that he couldn't handle the stress that he's facing.. (exam + me) so he ended it. I begged and pleaded him to give me another chance but he didn't give in.

 

I continued talking to him after that, and he was very cold towards me. Sometimes he would ignore me. He would lie to me about a lot of things. A month after the breakup, I found out that he got together with the girl I was insecure about.. He used to tell me that they will never get together again and he's over her.. I was devastated when I knew they got together. He told me he's happy with her and he has completely moved on from me. He said that even though she has hurt him deeply, she will always have a place in my heart..

 

The worst part is? She used to be my best friend.. And when my ex and I were together, she texted him saying that she'll like him forever. My ex showed me the text so I trust him. And I confront the girl after the breakup, she told me that 'she has loved him for so long and they have been through so much'. I don't get it, if she loved him, why did she leave him for another guy? And why does my ex believe her?

 

I am still working hard to get over this.. the thing is, I have tried everything, going out constantly, working on myself and meeting new people but everything just leads me back to him.. How can I move on from him? I think of him everyday and it has never changed. Also, I am trying to go on NC but I will be meeting him next week at a high school reunion. What should I do?

 

Sorry for the long winded post, I hope someone can advise me :(

Also, do you guys think that he ever had any feelings for me? I feel like I am a rebound to him.. He started dating me 2 months after the girl chose him for another guy..

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Hey guys, it has been 3 months since my ex boyfriend broke up with me. I am still in the process of moving on and it's getting tougher everyday :(

 

So, I met my ex when we were in high school, when we were both 13 years old. We were both friends but not close friends. So.. we somehow drifted apart and got closer back when we were 17. I have had a crush on him since the day I met him and it was graduation day already, so I decided I would confess to him. However, I was too shy to do so, so I asked my friend to help me. After knowing how I feel about him, he asked me out for a date and we had a great time together. :rolleyes: He asked me out a few days later, and I accepted. We dated for a year and 3 months. I was always very insecure because he used to have things going on with this girl that I'm friends with. They dated briefly before but she ended up choosing another guy over him.. He was honest about this with me so I trusted him. Towards the end of our relationship, I found out that he and her got in contact again.. And he snatched his phone away from me because he was afraid I would see it. He kept insisting that they were friends. We got into a huge argument and that was during his exam period.. so he broke up with me. He told me that he couldn't handle the stress that he's facing.. (exam + me) so he ended it. I begged and pleaded him to give me another chance but he didn't give in.

 

I continued talking to him after that, and he was very cold towards me. Sometimes he would ignore me. He would lie to me about a lot of things. A month after the breakup, I found out that he got together with the girl I was insecure about.. He used to tell me that they will never get together again and he's over her.. I was devastated when I knew they got together. He told me he's happy with her and he has completely moved on from me. He said that even though she has hurt him deeply, she will always have a place in my heart..

 

The worst part is? She used to be my best friend.. And when my ex and I were together, she texted him saying that she'll like him forever. My ex showed me the text so I trust him. And I confront the girl after the breakup, she told me that 'she has loved him for so long and they have been through so much'. I don't get it, if she loved him, why did she leave him for another guy? And why does my ex believe her?

 

I am still working hard to get over this.. the thing is, I have tried everything, going out constantly, working on myself and meeting new people but everything just leads me back to him.. How can I move on from him? I think of him everyday and it has never changed. Also, I am trying to go on NC but I will be meeting him next week at a high school reunion. What should I do?

 

Sorry for the long winded post, I hope someone can advise me :(

Also, do you guys think that he ever had any feelings for me? I feel like I am a rebound to him.. He started dating me 2 months after the girl chose him for another guy..

 

Sorry to say this but by you checking his phone or confronting him about this actually puts her in his mind even more,

Maybe nothing would have happened between them, But by you confronting him he actually thinks more about her and their very brief relationship

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Yeah I guess. I was overseas for a week. When I returned home and went to see him, we were having a really great time. I always used his phone to go on social medias and he is used to it. That day I was just being the usual and taking his phone but he snatched it from me. I told him I was going to leave the house if he's not gonna tell me what is it that he is hiding from but he still didn't want to tell me. He even lied to me that he was just deleting pictures. He only told me the truth when we broke up, that they have been texting for a week plus, during the time when I was at overseas.

 

Also, to add on, we had an argument about him snapchatting her in the past, he told me he deleted snapchat for me. When I got snapchat months later, I told him to snapchat me and he told me no, he doesn't want to because he's afraid we would argue over something stupid again. However, I noticed that she was in his best friends list. I confronted him and he lied to me, telling me that it was history. I believed him. Only until much later, I realised that he didn't delete snapchat and he was snapchatting her all along during our relationship.

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Yeah I guess. I was overseas for a week. When I returned home and went to see him, we were having a really great time. I always used his phone to go on social medias and he is used to it. That day I was just being the usual and taking his phone but he snatched it from me. I told him I was going to leave the house if he's not gonna tell me what is it that he is hiding from but he still didn't want to tell me. He even lied to me that he was just deleting pictures. He only told me the truth when we broke up, that they have been texting for a week plus, during the time when I was at overseas.

 

Also, to add on, we had an argument about him snapchatting her in the past, he told me he deleted snapchat for me. When I got snapchat months later, I told him to snapchat me and he told me no, he doesn't want to because he's afraid we would argue over something stupid again. However, I noticed that she was in his best friends list. I confronted him and he lied to me, telling me that it was history. I believed him. Only until much later, I realised that he didn't delete snapchat and he was snapchatting her all along during our relationship.

 

One of my ex's (not my last ex but like 3 ex's back) actually did the exact same thing you did.

She revived the feelings I had for someone that I didn't even think of anymore. She persisted so much that I actually left her for that person, It becomes like a challenge for them, by you showing that you care or are jealous.

They will actually try even harder to get back because now its like a taboo for them especially if you know her and she used to be your friend.

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live and learn, sorry for you, he sounds like a player, tbh, you her, yada yada, two women wanting one guy,

 

not a nice man to have done all that manipulating or the two of you simultaneously, do not waste your pretty years, read a book, or travel and make big changes

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One of my ex's (not my last ex but like 3 ex's back) actually did the exact same thing you did.

She revived the feelings I had for someone that I didn't even think of anymore. She persisted so much that I actually left her for that person, It becomes like a challenge for them, by you showing that you care or are jealous.

They will actually try even harder to get back because now its like a taboo for them especially if you know her and she used to be your friend.

 

Hey, thanks for your response. So are you still with the person you left your ex for? :)

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live and learn, sorry for you, he sounds like a player, tbh, you her, yada yada, two women wanting one guy,

 

not a nice man to have done all that manipulating or the two of you simultaneously, do not waste your pretty years, read a book, or travel and make big changes

 

I am trying to move on.. thanks though :(

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It's very possible that you were his rebound as 2 months (which is within my danger zone) is a very short time and it seems he never really closed that chapter of his book fully. It sounds like he used you, is manipulative, and decided to give a BS excuse of "stress". On the bright side of things, you should be happy that this relationship ended before things got more serious such as marriage, etc. I doubt you checking his phone "pushed" him closer to her, it sounds like it was bound to happen sooner or later.

 

It's not uncommon for dumpees to still be thinking of their ex 3 months post break-up as your mind is still struggling to adjust to this new lifestyle without him in it. Embrace the pain, cry when and if you need to, better your life, stick through with NC (to the full extent), and understand that with time comes acceptance. The nights and the holidays will be rough but the more time you spend with others, the less you'll think about him.

 

A high school reunion (which can happen as often as every five years depending on your school) isn't mandatory, it's ultimately up to you whether or not you want to attend. If you want to go to reconnect/discover how your other classmates' lives have changed, you don't have to meet him in particular.

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Hey, thanks for your response. So are you still with the person you left your ex for? :)

 

No, And I would have never started talking with her if my ex never would have mentioned her, The only reason i got back with her for a very short time was because my ex always confronted me about her and actually put her in my head again

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No, And I would have never started talking with her if my ex never would have mentioned her, The only reason i got back with her for a very short time was because my ex always confronted me about her and actually put her in my head again

 

The ONLY reason, really? I just broke up with my bf 5 weeks ago and lo and behold he is now carrying on some sort of relationship with a girl I used to be suspicious about. It would be pretty pathetic if he struck up this 'relationship' with this girl only due to the fact that I used to question him about her. Sounds like a lot of work for no real reason.

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The ONLY reason, really? I just broke up with my bf 5 weeks ago and lo and behold he is now carrying on some sort of relationship with a girl I used to be suspicious about. It would be pretty pathetic if he struck up this 'relationship' with this girl only due to the fact that I used to question him about her. Sounds like a lot of work for no real reason.

 

JBlackstone - if only I knew you outside of LS. There would be plenty of wine to be drank/drunk/drinked. :laugh:

 

Frank - I don't really buy that. Just sounds like an excuse to talk to someone you've most likely been wanting to talk to but couldn't because of your ex.

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For sure, shoegal!!

 

It was the summer of 2003. i was in the military and me and the ex ex ex ex were just married. I was 19 she was 18. We just moved into a new apartment and ex finds a piece of paper with a number and initials of that girl in an old book while moving.

Anyways she calls that number and the girl answers i don't know what they talked about. but starts asking me and confronting me about it. On my kids i never would have called her and i never remembered that i had her number in that book.

she sparked a curiosity an old high school flame, Bored one day at work I decided to call since ex would constantly hound me about her and always confronted me about her in a jealous way. When i called that girl said to me that she never stopped loving me after 2 years of NC and that I was the love of her life bla bla bla,

long story short on leave from military we met and had a very short lived fling that cost me my first marriage,

I don't regret it because of that situation I left both of them and met the mother of my kids which is the reason I am here now.

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