LittleHamster Posted August 9, 2014 Share Posted August 9, 2014 So some weeks ago when i was on a vacation up north in pakistan i get this random friend request and the person seemed really decent and was good-looking and everything. We started talking and hit it off instantly. I realised that i had an acquaintance with him in common and wondered if that guy forwarded my link to him but he said he added me randomly and i believed him. We were on sync in everything, talked for hours straight everyday. Had the same taste in music, movies. He was a documentary filmmaker and i had a lot of knowledge in that area so we could talk forever and not get bored. We were super attracted to each other. Counted days until we could finally meet when i came back to lahore. Anyway, i came back after a few weeks and we met and he took me over to his place and we had an amazing time together. So after like two hours or so, he gets this call from his friend and apparently he has to meet him like in half an hour because that guy has come over from another city and would be around for very less time. My red flags all started blaring, like this was our first date together and he is already ditching it right after we made out? So i get up, and start wearing my clothes. He gets alarmed and asks me whats wrong and im just like nothing, you really have to go meet him like RIGHT NOW?? so lets go and not keep him waiting. He now looks extremely flabbergasted. Starts panicking and all the truth starts spilling out like a stream. Like hey i really like you but i hope you werent under the impression that we were getting into a serious relationship? (On those phonecalls he always referred me as his woman, he said he wasnt interested in dating other people and would be open with me to everyone because im the only one he cares about) and now he has made that about turn and starts saying things like but i never said I LOVE YOU, did i. I mean i thought you're going away in a years time anyway. (Im applying for a degree abroad this fall) and he says he would be gone too. To this, i reply that hey i wasnt asking you to marry me, even if we have no future together that doesnt mean that we cant have real feelings for each other. ( He was also very hesitant to kiss me, it was like he had some barrier up) Apparently he had gotten out of a seven year relationship a year ago and didnt want to commit again. anyway, i think he added me because that acquaintance of ours told him i was easy going and he could have fun with me or whatever. (Open relationships are a BIG deal in pakistan, we get called sluts and everything) So i cant hold back my teary eyes and my voice is trembling, then i ask him to drop me home. All the way he is trying to make small talk but i dont say much. Then later he and i both texted that we couldnt get along with eachothers wishes. He wanted to be friends but i refused. I went total NC with him and blocked him and that friend of his after a few days. I WAS really in love with him. Still wondering if i did anything wrong. But most probably he just freaked out when he sensed that he is getting back into the relationship trap again. Wish he would come back because ive never been more miserable in my life. Stabbing pain but i would NEVER go begging to him. I know that wont work. I just wish he'd come back but im so sure he would not. He was such an honest and perfect person earlier. and changed 180 right when we met. He did find me attractive as hell and told me he found me intriguing and said he really really liked me. But i guess that wasnt enough for him. What do you guys think? Link to post Share on other sites
preraph Posted August 9, 2014 Share Posted August 9, 2014 The only thing you did wrong was you believed all his lies. He only wanted sex and he is the worst kind of liar who will tell a woman anything at all to get her trust and then have sex. I am so sorry you fell for him, but this is what dating is for, finding out more about the person -- and now you know he is a lying jerk, so please block him every way imaginable and don't waste time crying over his lying ass. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
ExpatInItaly Posted August 9, 2014 Share Posted August 9, 2014 I think you got played. He sweet-talked his way into getting you to come over to his apartment on the first date. You'd never met him in person and he was calling you "his" woman - that should have been a major red flag. He said all the right things to get you where he wanted you, and it worked, unfortunately. Tough lesson to learn, but never give your heart to someone you don't really know. You need to polish up your BS-radar, and get better at weeding out the smooth-talkers from the sincere guys. Don't fall too hard too fast in the future. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author LittleHamster Posted August 9, 2014 Author Share Posted August 9, 2014 Sucks to admit it, but you guys are probably right. I got played like a fool. Sigh. Whats the best cure for a breakup, humiliation, and i have it right here. Link to post Share on other sites
Requiem4Dreams Posted August 10, 2014 Share Posted August 10, 2014 I wish there were such a thing as a best cure. I'd follow through with that in a heartbeat. Only thing you can do is strict NC, move on and keep yourself busy with things. Heartbreak is the best time to find yourself, at least it seems like it to me. Know your value and never compromise it. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author LittleHamster Posted August 10, 2014 Author Share Posted August 10, 2014 Yeah thats what im thinking, and my feelings of resentment towards his behaviour are also helping me get over my idea of him. Still miserable though, but this will pass. trying to keep busy Link to post Share on other sites
Requiem4Dreams Posted August 10, 2014 Share Posted August 10, 2014 One of my favorite mantra's lately is "This too shall pass". Words to live by for those with broken hearts. Hang in there, It will get better. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author LittleHamster Posted August 17, 2014 Author Share Posted August 17, 2014 Theres 6 unread messages from him on whatsapp, the first one was, hey beautiful angry bird. Im panicking. Somebody stop me from opening those messages and replying him back ;_; Link to post Share on other sites
Requiem4Dreams Posted August 18, 2014 Share Posted August 18, 2014 You already know not to. I will tell you everything you allow into your life from him will set you back dramatically. It's like ripping a band-aid off of a fresh wound that is starting to scab up. You can be stronger than this. Just delete any social media until you are ready to be on it again. Stay strong. Link to post Share on other sites
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