johnsonracer Posted August 1, 2014 Share Posted August 1, 2014 i was in a awful relationship. i cnat tell you how many times she went behind my back. i kept giving her chance after chance after chance. never stood up for myself. she would send nudes, hang out with guys behind my back, ****ed a couple of guys and i never left her now that shes gone i look back with disgust with myself. she said she used me and played me and shes right im so sick of myself right now i have no respect for myself. im angry at myself how can i get over this? how can i move pass teh face i let her walk all over me Link to post Share on other sites
Chi townD Posted August 1, 2014 Share Posted August 1, 2014 You move on from this. You heal and stick to NC. You make positive changes in your life. This is how you redeem yourself. Here's the rub. You made it so easy for her to walk all over you that she may come back and try it again. Especially if she hears how awesome your life is turning out. When that happens, you'll have the strength to tell her to "go screw herself" and walk away with your head held high. The best revenge you can get is to lead a damn good life. Link to post Share on other sites
Author johnsonracer Posted August 1, 2014 Author Share Posted August 1, 2014 You move on from this. You heal and stick to NC. You make positive changes in your life. This is how you redeem yourself. Here's the rub. You made it so easy for her to walk all over you that she may come back and try it again. Especially if she hears how awesome your life is turning out. When that happens, you'll have the strength to tell her to "go screw herself" and walk away with your head held high. The best revenge you can get is to lead a damn good life. i really am trying..its hard Link to post Share on other sites
OwMyEyeball Posted August 1, 2014 Share Posted August 1, 2014 You move on from this. You heal and stick to NC. You make positive changes in your life. This is how you redeem yourself. Here's the rub. You made it so easy for her to walk all over you that she may come back and try it again. Especially if she hears how awesome your life is turning out. When that happens, you'll have the strength to tell her to "go screw herself" and walk away with your head held high. The best revenge you can get is to lead a damn good life. I agree with this to a point. However, if your source for self-betterment is not genuine self-esteem, but some misguided plot for revenge, you're essentially still allowing another person to dictate your path in life. You're "living a better life" to snub another. Your driver is anger. Resentment. The only person you should be living your life for is yourself. Don't mistake this approach for selfishness. If you're true to yourself and who you are, and part of who you are is showing genuine compassion towards others, that part of you will shine. What are you passionate about? That may be a tough one to answer right now if you're in a funk. But when you get a chance, explore that a bit. Unfortunately, there will be some hurt to feel. Link to post Share on other sites
Chi townD Posted August 1, 2014 Share Posted August 1, 2014 i really am trying..its hard If it was easy, then this website wouldn't be here. Yeah, you're going to hurt. You're human. The one thing she's going to remember, even though she used you, she'll also remember that you treated her right. You shouldn't feel bad for being a good guy and nor should you apologize for that! You make positive changes in your life to gain back your self esteem, your self confidence and your self worth which are probably in the toilet right now. Get a new hairstyle. Buy new clothes. Go to the gym and get fit and ripped. Get a new hobby and join a club; like, a cycling club or running club or co-ed sports or mens soccer league. TRAVEL! Go see the world and have some adventures! Start doing those things and I PROMISE YOU, you're going to start feeling better. Link to post Share on other sites
Author johnsonracer Posted August 1, 2014 Author Share Posted August 1, 2014 mentally im just hurt and the lats time i saw her i was just in pain and just went on about a 5 minute rant at her calling her every nam ein the book. its like everything was bottled up inside..it hasnt heped juts remembering the times i didnt stand up for myself..ugh Link to post Share on other sites
alexwood Posted August 1, 2014 Share Posted August 1, 2014 mentally im just hurt and the lats time i saw her i was just in pain and just went on about a 5 minute rant at her calling her every nam ein the book. its like everything was bottled up inside..it hasnt heped juts remembering the times i didnt stand up for myself..ugh you will get better Link to post Share on other sites
Author johnsonracer Posted August 1, 2014 Author Share Posted August 1, 2014 damn im down..ugh Link to post Share on other sites
music_and_poetry Posted August 1, 2014 Share Posted August 1, 2014 Think of this break-up as the universe giving you a second chance to reclaim your pride. Take it and run! Link to post Share on other sites
Author johnsonracer Posted August 1, 2014 Author Share Posted August 1, 2014 Think of this break-up as the universe giving you a second chance to reclaim your pride. Take it and run! im trying i really am Link to post Share on other sites
adapting Posted August 2, 2014 Share Posted August 2, 2014 Try not to let this relationship make you bitter for the next one. You didn't do anything wrong - she was just an *******. That's not your fault, and you should never feel bad for being a good person! And there are lots of girls out there who won't treat you that way. Link to post Share on other sites
hoping2heal Posted August 2, 2014 Share Posted August 2, 2014 Hi Johnson, Most people (self included) can attest to the fact that they let someone treat them like crap (or at least less than they deserve) at one point or another. It's a learning curve, and until you have that experience you sometimes cannot help but be naive. You give the benefit of the doubt, you trust feelings over facts, and you just believe it's going to get better. An experience like what you've been through can help you to be aware of your own behavior (did you ignore red flags? were you in denial about this person's behavior? were you unrealistic with your expectations at some point?) in the relationship and you can use that to have a better relationship in the future. It's natural that you feel so foolish now that you have the hindsight to see things more clearly, but we all make foolish decisions at one point or another and as cliched as the saying goes, they're really only a waste if we choose to ignore what they teach us. So, try not to be so hard on yourself for being human. You have the chance to do better with the next relationship and that includes making decisions that will better protect you and help you sort out the weeds from the blooms. Link to post Share on other sites
emotionalMess Posted August 2, 2014 Share Posted August 2, 2014 Don't shed one more tear over this evil selfish beeyatch who is does not deserve your attention. Be happy that you will never have to see or talk to her again. Make sure you delete every photo, and block her from everything. Look at it this way, you are free now from this evil person. Now get yourself to a place where you will be ready to find someone really good for you and be excited about that. I'm excited for you man. Cheer up. Link to post Share on other sites
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