Can I forgive her having sex??

[derrick231]

Yes me and my ex-fiancee are talking again....I would like to have her back, but I just found out she messed around with a guy, and I am now thinking she might have had sex with him too......Can I forgive her for that and forget about it and move on.....Or is it time to find someone else.?? I'm asking her the truth today....I'm scared...please help

[RoboHobo]

Gee, thats a tough one. Well first of all did she fool around with this guy while you were together or while you were separated? If it was while you were apart there isn't anything you can blame her for doing. The second thing is did she actually sleep with him? At the moment all you have is a feeling that she did, which isn't really proof of anything. When you are in love with someone and are missing them your head can play nasty tricks on you. Ask her what she and this guy got up to and then see.

 

As for forgiving the person, it is entirely a personal thing. What were the circumstances, does she still love you and would she do it again? For me personally, if my ex did sleep with another guy and then decided that she wants to get back together with me I'd get over it. If she says that she loves me that is. Thats just me though, I know that people make decisions that hurt one another, it's only human. I love her enough to move away from the past and concentrate on building our relationship. If she cheated on me whilst in a relationship I'm not sure what I would do, if she sees it as a mistake and still loves me I'd forgive her and stay with her. If she is not entirely happy with our relationship, then as much as it hurts me, the mistake was a sign of a deeper problem and we'd at least split up for a while to sort ourselves out.

 

Thankfully this hasn't happened to me though, so I can't offer first hand advice just the way I feel now.

 

Good luck and trust your heart! It will show you the right thing to do.