sspin123 Posted July 12, 2004 Share Posted July 12, 2004 Hi, about 1 month ago my boyfriend and i had an argument. We've been together for 6.5 years.He came over late for dinner and a little drunk. i was not happy with that. So instead of getting through the argument and working it out, he has chosen to break up with me. He has done this in the past where he wanted his freedom. I am 25 and he will be 27, we have been through alot of rough stuff together and made it through. Us living away, deaths, etc. So it pains me to see that he would give up now, after all we have been through. Also it is at a point where i wanted to settle down. 1 week before the breakup he was talking with me and how we would raise our kids,etc. Then during the argument about the fight we had he told me he wasn't ready to settle down. It seems as if a few nights with the guys made his whole thought pattern different. Since then i mistakenly, left crying messsages and messages when i had a drink in me. So he wasn't too happy about that. He has started a new job in the city and i fear and feel maybe he has found a new crowd. I wrote him an email saying that the pressure of his new job and me trying to fix things isnt good, and that we should both clear our heads. Everyone is saying back away and make him miss you and wonder what you are doing. It is hard but i am going to try to do that for at least a month. I meet guys everywhere but it doesn't matter i love him so much. I wake up distrought, cry and have to leave the dinner table, want to know what hes doing and if he's found someone. And maybe that is the reason. He is a very stubborn guy and i think maybe i need to do what he is not expecting me to do, which is not call him. I wrote him a letter, reminding him of all our good memories and how i love him for all his habits and for who is. It is actually about 9 pages. I just sent it. Also on a last note, i asked him mother if he said anything and he told her," I don't want to talk about it, I want to be alone, i want to think". This was before all my upset phone calls though. I sent the letter, and he still hasnt returned my phone calls. I called his mother and brought up a name of a girl that i thought he might be seeing. So it turns out he called me because he thinks i got into his phone somehow. I denied it. So i heard from a friend of his who talked to his cousin, he asked his cousin what he was doing today, and his cousin said," Hanging out with marco and his girl". Marco is my boyfriend(ex), and his girl isnt me its the girl i was leary about. So now i know he has already jumped to this girl that he was seeing for only 2 months when we broke up 3 years ago. But it makes me think that maybe hes been keeping in contact with her. So i've been trying to keep cool so i don't look like the psycho and give them both something to talk about. i have written a few emails to him about how friends of mine broke up but eventually got back toghether. And how much i love him. Only 2 so far. So as for me right now, i am moving on, but only with hopes that we will get back toghether. Should i play the "no contact" rule so it will make him wonder. or keep writing him emais here and there. However, will this make him feel like he still has me and can have his cake and eat it too. He is the love of my life and i dont want to lose him. any advice would help! Link to post Share on other sites
hurtingandconfused Posted July 13, 2004 Share Posted July 13, 2004 Every case/story/relationship is different. Short story of what happened to me. My ex broke up with me 6 months ago(were together for 3 years-she's 20 I'm 21.) After 5 months of no It ends up that she also missed me. If you push him away right now he will not want to talk to you in the future. If you let him go, more than likely a friendship will be established later on. "Whatever happens now shapes the future." He is the love of my life and i dont want to lose him "You cannot lose something you never had." Link to post Share on other sites
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