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Silent treatment?!


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Good morning everyone.

 

I feel sick to my stomach and came on here for help. My boyfriend of six months and I got into an argument Friday night. He took me out to dinner and during the dinner he said I was acting different (I was being quiet because I am going through things quit my job, etc.) When I disagreed with him, he became angry and well by then with him once he's upset you cant change his mood. I kept telling him i DONT want to fight I love you. He replied with I want to go home (we had tickets for a comedy show after) so as we are walking to the train he walked up ahead, then enters the train (I had to buy a metro card) so I am thinking he left me but then he does approach me and we head into the train together he doesnt sit down next to me but stands infront of me while I am sitting so I dont like when he is nasty with me and I tell him I am going home as his stop is approaching he asks me what stop Im getting off at I say my stop and then at his stop he leaves. He says bye and I say I love you bye. He has told me many times before that he hates that I leave him and hates to be alone at his place. (He constantly wants me to stay over) but I also didnt want to deal with his anger and I have self respect.

 

So after Friday night I have called, emailed, texted even went to his place last night. He didnt answer the doorman's call or he might have been out. Regardless, the doorman left him a message telling him I was there. Today is Sunday morning and havent heard a thing from him. I dont know what to do. I have a lot of stuff, laundry, luggage, my ipad etc. at his place. (We just came back from Florida and had a great time together). I dont get what is going on. I feel absolutely horrible. He hasnt taken off the in the relationship on facebook but he is acting like a child. He is 27, I am 32. Has anyone been in this situation? Please I need advice.

 

Also before I left Florida, his mom took me aside and said I was very good for him and she knows how difficult he is. She also told me not to tell him she said this to me. (In Florida, he fought with his parents).

 

I am so confused and hurt.

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That is clearly childlike behavior and simply get ready for him throwing more tantrums like this in public. Reality is that he has a very difficult time communicating with you specially when he is upsets and resorts to anger and resentment. If you are willing to work things out with him you must set bounderies and explain to him that his behavior is inappropriate and it's best to come to a resolution by talking like two grown adults. This will take a lot of work trust me I know, it's simply the way he chooses to deal with things and feels more comfortable getting upset and walking away.

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Temper tantrums and silent treatments -- oh boy, been there, had that done to me. In public several times. He even yelled at me in public, over even the smallest things. Dear, I think you are better off without him. Do not chase after him, and if you can, try to leave this abusive relationship. You might not want to admit it, but this IS a form of abuse and manipulation. This man has issues and you shouldn't be his punching bag/doormat/etc. And you can't fix him. I'd walk away from this while you still can.

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