ConfusedT Posted May 14, 2013 Share Posted May 14, 2013 I literally have all of his things at my house and I don't know how many times I've offered to drop it off or have him come pick it up.. It is all in the garage, I'm not staring at it weeping any longer if thats a concern So FINALLY, after days of ignoring me, he TELLS, not ASKS, me to drop it off, but I don't feel like I have to any longer after all it is HIS STUFF & i dont want to appear weak and jump when he says jump. I've always catered to him and done everything he has asked me to, I feel like I should stand my ground for once and make it clear- that I will not do ANYTHING for you anymore after what you put me through. My questions are: Should I actually go drop off his stuff? & should I just ignore him until he makes effort to get it? I know it seems like I am playing a game, but I am just tired of being a doormat. Link to post Share on other sites
GI_Joy Posted May 14, 2013 Share Posted May 14, 2013 It's his responsibility, not yours. Just leave it out in the front yard. Tell him to come get it before your neighbors start confusing it for a free curb-side giveaway. That's what my sister did. Got the point across 3 Link to post Share on other sites
mammasita Posted May 14, 2013 Share Posted May 14, 2013 My questions are: Should I actually go drop off his stuff? & should I just ignore him until he makes effort to get it? HELL NO! You're doing the right thing not jumping through hoops for him. He doesn't deserve it. At the most, take his stuff to a mutual friend or family member....aaaaand DONE. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Zahara Posted May 14, 2013 Share Posted May 14, 2013 (edited) I know it seems like I am playing a game, but I am just tired of being a doormat. And this is the douchebag that cheated on you? Sadly, you're still a doormat. Tell him that his stuff will be sitting outside your house (day, time) and to please feel free to pick it up. If he doesn't pick up by (day, time), it will be picked up by the trash collector. No games. No doormat. If his stuff was that important to him, he would have picked it up a long time ago or used you to deliver them to him when you offered. Edited May 14, 2013 by Zahara 3 Link to post Share on other sites
Zahara Posted May 14, 2013 Share Posted May 14, 2013 "Showed up at my door to give me some of my things back, i tried to shut the door but he just barged his way in and gave me the money & things he owed me. He then said well you wanted to talk right, so talk.. i said i have nothing to say, so then he proceeded to talk.... he apologized which made me start crying incessantly and then we started arguing because he called me "WEAK" because i was crying, so i told him to leave. he told me no and went and grabbed some of his things.. i sat on the couch waiting for him to leave, still crying and he came and held me and apologized again saying he just didnt care about me any more because i become weak and ugly since he met me... thanks! he left.. what a fn douchebag...." :(:(:( You posted this a few days ago and you're asking us if you need to deliver his stuff or hold it in hopes of making him put forth effort in getting them? Unbelievable. Link to post Share on other sites
CarrieT Posted May 14, 2013 Share Posted May 14, 2013 TELL HIM when his stuff will be put on the curb and he can come get it. /thread. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author ConfusedT Posted May 14, 2013 Author Share Posted May 14, 2013 YES, this is the DBAG that cheated on me and pushed me, also letting me know that I am the cause of all his actions... I know. That's my point. I feel like a total DOORMAT and Im hoping that by ignoring him and making him get his things rather than ME doing something for him again because he DEMANDED it, will somehow EMPOWER me & stop making me feel so upset. I left HIM, I should feel strong and happy that I got away from this man after what he put me through, but i still feel weak and im hoping that doing this will help me stand up for myself... You guys don't think so? Link to post Share on other sites
ThatJustHappened Posted May 14, 2013 Share Posted May 14, 2013 It's his responsibility, not yours. Just leave it out in the front yard. Tell him to come get it before your neighbors start confusing it for a free curb-side giveaway. That's what my sister did. Got the point across THIS THIS A THOUSAND TIMES THIS! Do it!!! Link to post Share on other sites
Zahara Posted May 15, 2013 Share Posted May 15, 2013 YES, this is the DBAG that cheated on me and pushed me, also letting me know that I am the cause of all his actions... I know. That's my point. I feel like a total DOORMAT and Im hoping that by ignoring him and making him get his things rather than ME doing something for him again because he DEMANDED it, will somehow EMPOWER me & stop making me feel so upset. I left HIM, I should feel strong and happy that I got away from this man after what he put me through, but i still feel weak and im hoping that doing this will help me stand up for myself... You guys don't think so? Nope. Cut that one last tie to him. By chucking his stuff curbside, you're now growing a backbone and setting your terms. These things will be a point of contention and constant trigger if you keep playing this game with him. Dump it on the curb and be done with it and him. He's sitting on his ass while you're providing free storage for his things. Enough already. Cut the douchebag off, get rid of his stuff and move on. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts