Why did he buy me a V-day gift?!

[Mayfare]

Someone please help me out here. I know I already posted about, but no one replied and I'm so distraught!

 

We broke up 5 weeks ago and haven't talked much since. He broke up with me because he couldn't have a relationship right now. He isn't dating anyone and doesn't want to, but he knows I'm seeing other people. He texted me today to let me know he bought me chocolates for Valentine's Day, but it's not to upset me or confuse me and just from a friend. He wanted me to know he still cares about me and I'm important to him.

 

WHAT is this?! Why would you buy your recent ex-gf a Valentine's Day gift?! I told him I couldn't accept them anymore, but I feel like that was mean. I've been feeling terrible about it all day

[veggirl]

How long did you guys date? If it wasn't very long, maybe he really does view you as a friend.

 

if it was a lengthy time, that is totally inappropriate and I'm not sure his motives...I guess to make himself look like "the good guy". I would NOT accept those chocolates..did you respond to his message? The "just as a friend" bit he added says it all really.

[Mayfare]

Thanks for the reply veggirl! We dated for two years and were four months shy of moving across the country together. I did reply to his message and told him I wasn't confused or upset, but we weren't together anymore and I didn't think it was right for me to accept things from anymore either. I told him it was sweet of him but he should keep the chocolates for himself lol.

 

I could definitely see him doing it to maintain his "good guy" image, because he really is a great guy, just immature. I just feel like even if it's not to confuse me, it is confusing haha.

[Absewarrior]

Mayfare:

The relationship is over and he did something inappropriate. Buying chocolates for an ex-gf of two years is really not good because it makes you feel upset. You did exactly the right thing by nicely declining. Just let it go and try to remove the incident from your mind. You did nothing wrong by rejecting them. He was the one who acted inappropriately. He does sound immature.

AW

[Mayfare]

Thanks AW. Ugh I just can't stop wondering why he actually did this. I can just see him so clearly going to buy me a box of chocolates and being happy because he knows it will make me smile. It just makes me miss him so much. I keep thinking that he's got to still care, he still wants me in his life, and he'll come around eventually. It's terrible.

[destroyed4sho]

Thanks AW. Ugh I just can't stop wondering why he actually did this. I can just see him so clearly going to buy me a box of chocolates and being happy because he knows it will make me smile. It just makes me miss him so much. I keep thinking that he's got to still care, he still wants me in his life, and he'll come around eventually. It's terrible.

My ex sent me a "Happy Vday :-)" message...kinda the same concept. It is just to ease their guilt and soothe their soul from breaking up with you because they know you are alone on Vday because of them.

[Mayfare]

I wasn't alone on Valentine's Day though...and he knew that. We spoke briefly on Monday and he told me he wasn't doing anything for it and when he asked me, I told him I had plans to go out with someone else. This guy is the king of mixed signals haha.

[destroyed4sho]

I wasn't alone on Valentine's Day though...and he knew that. We spoke briefly on Monday and he told me he wasn't doing anything for it and when he asked me, I told him I had plans to go out with someone else. This guy is the king of mixed signals haha.

 

Well, since you guys have been in contact, the dumper thinks you are friends and so that is why he sent you the chocolates.

[Mayfare]

We really haven't been in contact though. We didn't speak for weeks before Monday, and on Monday we only spoke about his father's surgery, and then he asked about Valentine's Day. He knows I'm not interested in being friends...or at least I thought he did haha.