Emotional Pain is Far Worst than Physical Pain

[wallyw]

I would rather you break both my arms and legs than go through the misery of an long term emotional breakup.

 

 

My life seems so empty without the love of my life.

 

 

I want her to be happy, but I want to be happy too.

 

 

 

I want to move on but I feel so depressed. My life seems so empty now. I spend each waking moment thinking about her.

 

 

I am so lonely and just go through the motions at work.

 

 

She was the first true love of my life.

 

 

Why can't I get over her?

 

 

 

I began writing a journal trying to finally let go.

 

 

I know this is not good for my mental well being and just want to feel better and get on with my life, but this is so hard.

 

 

I am not that of an attractive guy, but she is the most beautiful woman I ever met. I think the attractive women feel that they can just go on to the next guy without looking back at who they just crushed.

[A.S]

i agree..im going through one right now..but its the opposite..sometimes those beautiful sweet girls who get crushed theres no rule in relationships..you can be the most handsome successful guy ever and still get crushed..i loved a guy who at first when we started dating asked me if he was "boring"! and he thought im too good for him then after a few guys he chose the easy way out..and just let go..so..cheerup

[A.S]

sorry after a few "fights" *

[wallyw]

Thanks.

 

Its that I am so sad that it debilitating and I can't seem to get through the day.

 

Nothing seems important to me anymore without her.

 

I want to move on but I don't know how to.

 

I hate the way I feel and almost wish I never met her.

 

She gave me the best years I have ever known in my life.

 

All I have left is my memories.

[Mcnulty]

This time last year, I was on here in a right state. heartbroken and betrayed, she left me without telling me, announced it on FB and it was my friend!!!

 

Now a year later....rushed to a&e in March, they nearly lost me, 5 operations later and another one coming, constant pain and discomfort, an illness which hinders me socially, registered disabled, only allowed to work 4 hours a day, afraid i will lose my job over this, oh and single because of my illness, it makes me feel like a leper!

 

Would I go back to a year ago?....In a heartbeat, knowing what I know now re. time being the greatest ally/healer you have, yes,yes,yes!!

 

Your health is the greatest gift you will ever have. For you and all the people on here in turmoil and emotional pain....it will pass...be thankful for what you have, not what you have not...your heart will heal with patience and TIME.

[wallyw]

I know everyone here says you will heal one day.

 

I pray to God that happens and I can feel normal and happy again.

 

Sometimes it takes getting worse before it gets better.

 

I am sorry you also had to endure health issues on top of having someone you love, leave you.

 

I just feel so hopeless and helpless that I am letting this affect my life so much.

 

I was alone for the most part of my life. I never knew love could be so wonderful.

 

Now that I have lost it, I feel that if I never loved someone as much as I loved her, I would not have missed being in love.

 

She once told me the old saying, its better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all.

 

I don't believe that. If I never loved, I would not miss it as much as I do now.

[suladas]

It's not easy but ya you'll get over it, and find someone new. You're just too close to it right now. Time heals everything

[AlexDP]

This time last year, I was on here in a right state. heartbroken and betrayed, she left me without telling me, announced it on FB and it was my friend!!!

 

Now a year later....rushed to a&e in March, they nearly lost me, 5 operations later and another one coming, constant pain and discomfort, an illness which hinders me socially, registered disabled, only allowed to work 4 hours a day, afraid i will lose my job over this, oh and single because of my illness, it makes me feel like a leper!

 

Would I go back to a year ago?....In a heartbeat, knowing what I know now re. time being the greatest ally/healer you have, yes,yes,yes!!

 

Your health is the greatest gift you will ever have. For you and all the people on here in turmoil and emotional pain....it will pass...be thankful for what you have, not what you have not...your heart will heal with patience and TIME.

 

I agree, Jimmy.

[wallyw]

My fear is that I will never recover from this.

 

Sometimes, time only makes you forget a lot, but it will still makes me wonder what could have been.

 

I pray that this does not happen to me.

 

I do not want to grow old and bitter.

[amaysngrace]

It's even worse when they beat the hell out of you AND treat you like s.hit

[wallyw]

I treated her like a princess and showered her with gifts.

 

It gave me great joy to see her happy.

 

She didn't have a lot of extra money to have the finer things in life.

 

I was more than glad to see her get what she wanted.

[na49]

I treated my girl like a princess too, but felt like her slave in the end. I did everything for her, showered her with gifts much like you did. Loved to see her happy, did whatever it took. Nice guys like us get hurt the most because we don't understand how it happens when we haven't done anything "wrong". You will get better, but you have to want to get better and you have to try to get better. Posting depressing messages like you've been doing doesn't help.

[wallyw]

Everything was stacked against our relationship.

 

Different cultural backgrounds.

 

She was 6 years older than me.

 

I was introverted and she was extroverted.

 

I lived in the inner city and she lived in the suburbs.

 

I was always thrifty, while she loved to shop.

 

I should be grateful this intimate relationship lasted 12 years.

 

Instead, I am overcome with guilt and unimaginable sadness.

[Eternal Sunshine]

Says a person that has never experienced horrific physical pain. Just sayin'

[Mcnulty]

Get it all out, on here, to your friends,family.

 

It's all part of the healing process. You're feeling sorry for yourself amd that's fine, but some day, it will have to stop.

 

I know people who have NEVER gotten over a relationship and are a shell of a person..that, to me is the biggest sadness in one's life, to be once bitten twice shy, especially if the ex has moved on with their life!

 

One life. Do you want to look back in a year and be in the same position?? You better not be! You have a spring board right now...you...a healthy you, someone who can exercise, get the endorphins going, they will counteract your depressive feelings...do it! I would kill to have that, I really would.

 

I'm friends with her a year later...you know why? Because I healed over time, I found forgiveness in my heart. 3 months ago I was praying for her, as she is v poorly also and would loved to just be part of her life...I am, i'm lucky. My point is, time, patience, treating every day as a gift, forgiveness, hope and counting your blessings....do it.

[wallyw]

Thank you for the words of encouragement.

 

I want to heal and I pray that in time I will have enough strength to move forward.

 

I am emotionally drained now, but I need to talk about this to someone. I am alone now and have no close friends to talk about this to.

 

I came to this website to find help.

[magnoliasoutherly]

I am emotionally drained now, but I need to talk about this to someone. I am alone now and have no close friends to talk about this to.

 

I came to this website to find help.

I have no close friends either to talk to about things. I am just so sorry. I read your old post back in '09. So it's been 12 years with her? And she just does this? God. I can only imagine your pain. It must be gut wrenching. Many hugs.

 

Know that you are not alone. There are plenty of us here for you. I don't know if you can pm me, I don't know that it will help either, but you're welcome to try if you want.

 

Again, many hugs.

[wallyw]

Thank you for the kinds words of support.

 

I added you as a network contact, but don't know how to pm on this website.

 

I wish I had close friends to talk to, but I don't.

[magnoliasoutherly]

Thank you for the kinds words of support.

You're very welcome.

 

I wish I had close friends to talk to, but I don't.

That's a big problem too because you need friends for an identity. I don't have any but in truth I have so much going on in my life right now I don't have time for them. However if something were to happen between my husband and I, I would certainly need someone.

 

How about your family? Have you been able to talk to any of them?

[wallyw]

No.

 

I don't feel I can talk to, or bother my brother and sisters about my innermost interpersonal relationship problems.

 

Beside they are all too busy raising their own families and some have problems of their own.

 

As time passes, I hope to forget about my first and only love.

 

I am grateful that she brought joy and purpose to my life, something I never thought would ever happen to me.

 

I must remember all good things must come to an end.

 

It's just so hard to let go.