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a letter what do you think???


breakingupletter

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breakingupletter

Ok me and my boyfriend are breaking up. i want some time I"m in the middle of a divorce and he is moving we have a lot of other stuff goign on in our lives. i wrote this letter I sent it to him but then he called and I feel guilty or bad I unsent it and was wondering what you loveshackers think. thanks Cathy

 

:::::,

Hey How are you. I've been thinking about you ever since we talked last night. I am so glad we finnanly talked "imed" actually. I have been thinking about "us" and where I want us to go or what to do from here. I wanted to talk to you a bout it but i doubt we'll be able to get a chance to talk face to face until late next week and I hate letting this go unresolved.

First like i said last night i got scared, i felt we had moved so fast into our relationship we bipassed all the fun stuff , like going out or having fun with each other. i felt almost like we were married already. i know its harder for us because of our kids are inlolved bu t i still wanted to spend time with just you and get to know you alot better.

I also felt like i said before that you didnt want to or couldnt open up to me. i felt like you had a wall up in front of you and didnt want to let me in. or i even feel like you dint want to come close to me . i know you said maybe me and you have had so much hurt in the past that we are just not able to be in a realtionship i dont think thats it for me at least. i wouldve let you know antyhign or get as clsoe to me as you wanted i just didnt feel like you made an effort..Maybe that was the problem for you maybe you've been hurt so badly by these past relationships you were scared that i would do the same to you.

I want you to know that you have been perfect to me, i could never have asked for more you are a great person, father, boyfreind, worker and everything else in life . it hurts me to know that you've been hurt so many times in you rlife because i care so deeply about you and your feelings. I never want to hurt you that is why i want to be upfront about my feelings and our situation.

Like i said before i dont really know how you feel about any of this because you dotn reaally say much. I know i've told you that i felt like we were together because it was convenient and stuff. i aslo said i felt like you were realieved when we split up. but you never answered me and told me if that is how you really feel and i hate to assume that it is. I know you care about me very deeply and you'd always be there for me.

I also hope you know that i would always be there for you. no matter what/when/or how i'll be here for you forever. I always want to be your freind if we cant be nothing more. I will alwyas be here for the kids too if you need anything with them and I HOPE that we can keep :::::: and them to be freinds she misses them so much she asks about melanie a few times a day and the others at leasst once a day (even my mom asked yesterday where you guys were :) ) I miss the kids terriably too, its hard for me. we all got so close so fast and i was just scared.

I miss you just as much as you say you miss me, in all ways i do. But i have been thining and i think that right now I need us to spend some time not really talking at least a couple of weeks. now i dont want you to sit and wait aroudn for me that is not what i'm asking . but i want to be sure that you and I want the same things, I also would like to get my divorce done with , that'll take a huge load off my shoulders and you'll be busy any way with your moving and stuff. if you never want to talk to me again i'll understnad (i wont be happy but i'll understand) this is the hardest thing i've ever had to do i was so happy with you and i love you so much but i want to know that we both have the same feelings i also want to get my divorce out of the way and get my job settled etc. i hope you can undersntad. you dont need to write me back i am not expecting anything from you. But i do want you to know that i love you and that i just need to do this for my own self and its not because of you. i just need some time to get thigns on track . i wishi was there right now giving you a big hug. love always and forever

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I assume you're initiating the break-up? I have to admit, if I'm your boyfriend and I'm reading this letter, I really have no idea what you want from me. Do you want me to apologize and try to open up to you more? Do you want to just take a little time off to get your divorce settled, and then start up again? Do you want me to never contact you or try to talk to you again? How can I do the right things if I'm not even sure what you're wanting here?

 

It sounds to me like even you don't know quite what you want right now. Maybe you need to figure that out and then re-write the letter with a little more focus? With some of the sentences in your letter about loving him so much, always being there for him, etc. I'm also wondering why you are even breaking up?

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Is it absolutely necessary to break up via letter? I don't know your situation, obviously, but the idea of breaking up this way is just not something I've ever been fond of.

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breakingupletter

I already broke up with him but he didnt get the picture . he still wants to maintan the same level of contact. I admit i dont know what i want . i want some time off until my divorce is final.

any othe rideas

cathy

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