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Why do i still love him?


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ok im not gonna drag this story out too long but anyway i will make my story short.

 

umm it all started last year when i started talking to this guy online which i ended up falling for alot after a few months and he turned out to be my first boyfriend and well we have been on and off for like a year now, he has broke up with me 4 times now and the last time he broke up with me was just over 3 months ago :'( and for some reason after everything he put me through and i ended up literally depressed and wanting to kill myself and feel worthless etc, i dont know why but after all that i still dont hate him one bit :/ i still love him more than anything and i really do miss him and after everything he put me through i think i want him back but thats not gonna happen cause he has a gf :( i just dont understand why after all this i still dont hate him one tiny bit :( i mean is there something wrong with me or is it normal? lol

 

Any suggestions would be greatly appreciated thankyou :)

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So he is your first love? That is why you still love him....I think for a lot of people, one's first love will always hold a special place in their hearts

 

Just stay away and go no contact. While I'm not against two people getting back together after a break up, but 4 break ups is way too many. So if he and his current gf break up and he comes back to you, PUSH him away....it will only result in a 5th break up. Just stay away from him

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I just want you to know that I feel your pain. :(

 

I still love my ex bf even after he's broken my heart 3 times and played with my emotions giving me false hope that there might be a chance for us and then whipping it away from me again. :(

 

He broke up with me a year ago because of an argument and 4 months ago because of an email argument and I was in contact for most of that time and he gave me so many false hopes making me think maybe it was just a break. And I saw him yesterday for probably the last time and he was flirting with me, being all touchy feeling just like old times, so I really thought he might want me back. But when I offered him my heart on a platter he rejected me all over again.

 

So I feel your pain. And I can relate to that feeling of still loving someone so deeply even though they've hurt you so much. And feeling like you should hate them or at least not love them anymore after how much they've hurt you.

 

But sadly love can't be turned off like that. :( And its just going to take time for the feelings to fade, different amounts of time for different people, years for some. So you're certainly not alone. :(

 

I love my ex so intensely still, miss him like crazy and the heartache is killing me. Set me back into despair after seeing him because I really thought there was hope, how he was with me, the flirting, the hugging, everything made me think there was hope and now all those false hopes I had that were proping me up and keeping me vaguely happy are gone again and I'm back to square one. Feeling worthless and empty from the rejection. :(

 

So if it makes you feel any better at all, please know that you are not alone. We're all suffering here on the break up forums and believe me I know how painful it can be. I'm living though it still now, worse than ever maybe, and its like hell on Earth. :( But I'm glad we have LS because we can help each other on here. :)

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Awww thanks guys :( i just think if he comes back im gonna wanna be with him all over again for some reason i just cant say no to him :'( hmmm i dunno i miss him soooo much and i wanna talk to him but i cant and i dont wanna get hurt again so yer i dunno :( i dont think he will be back this time though :( and i just cant move on.

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You need to recognize a pattern in his behavior.

You WILL move on. I promise you that.

As long as you WANT to.

Why sit around and only wait for time to do it? Time doesn't solve it.

Sure it makes it manageable but unless you do something to get over him.

Then time will not heal this wound.

 

 

Sometimes being in a manipulative and emotionally abusive relationship you feel you can't get out of it. Because they tear you down so much, they can only fix the damage. Because they did it.

 

This isn't a healthy relationship to hold onto.

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You will miss him, you will cry, and you will beg and scream out "WHY!!!!!". Know this: YOU are not always the best judge of what is best for you. You're not seeing clearly because you're so filled with emotion. You will move on in your own time. Be patient with yourself and take the good moments when they come. There will be a lot of bad moments too, but slowly you will get through. We have all been there hun :)

 

And when you met the super sexy sweetheart guy in your future, you won't even want to give what's his name another thought!

 

Stay true to yourself always!

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hmmm thanks guys :) i dunno if i wanna move on though its just too hard :( its just i dont think no one else out there will be like him and he was my everything :'( i just dont know how to get over him.

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I still love my ex. It is a very hard emotion to turn off!! He has hurt me, and done me so wrong...even post breakup he has been awful to me...and I def didnt deserve any of it. What I just did recently, and I refer back to it, I made a list of all the terrible things he has said/done since the day we broke up, it sometimes helps me get my mind in focus. If he came back, I know I would have a difficult time still, saying no to him. :confused: The battle between loving him and hating him still lingers on for me! But dont fault yourself for still loving him, we all know how it goes....

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