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Too late to start nc to get her back ?


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heartbroken555

HI

 

My ex left me about 3 months ago, for the 1st month we had regular contact by txt, and she would call me private to listen to my voice, ect. but i was an idiot, and played stupid games, like trying to make her jalous, and she knew i was.... sometimes i was mean, then at other times i would just break down and look desperate. i once called her at 4 am and we talked for an hour,and she said she still has feelings for me and she agreed to meet me on the next friday, but on that same day, she txt me and told me she couldnt anymore and offered to meet on sunday instead, and i was pissed for some reason, and i never answered her... then i ended up regretting it... anyways, at one point i sent her another email, and i was pretty pathetic and i wanted to see her real bad, but she turned me down, saying that she didnt have the same feelings for me , as i did for her, and that she had moved on, and that she doesnt love me anymore, but appreciates me. She said that there are good chances we would never end up together again ( but not saying its impossible, i guess she wants to see real changes in me first and doesnt trust that i will change), but she offered me to keep in touch by email from time to time to keep each other up to date about our lives...

 

I replied that i understood and respected her decision, and that i wasnt mad at her, and that i wish her the best, but that i cant keep contact with her now, and asking her not to contact me, and that i would contact her when im ready.

 

Here is my question, after 3 months of acting like desparete idiot, and playing silly games, and making a fool out of myself, do you think NC is too late to get her back ? and how long should i keep no contact ? some say 1 month, but i think 1 month is too short ! im always thinking about her, and its driving me nuts, i havent had contact with her for 3 weeks now, and i feel already better,should i wait till im completly over her to initate contact again ? i dont want to wait too long either, because im scared that she completly mooves on and finds someone else, or forgets about me....

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NC is not tool to get someone back, it some you do for yourself to help you heal. Read this:

 

http://www.loveshack.org/forums/t81399/

 

 

I am sorry to say it is over, she has moved on and you now focusing your energies on healing and moving on is the what YOU need to do now. It is hard but you will get through it.

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heartbroken555

so you mean i should just forget about her and move on and never contact her again ?? or can i contact her once i healed, lets say in a yr from now ?

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tehsensitive1

I am going through a breakup one month fresh of nc and I have to say it has helped me a lot. The first weeks were the hardest because when your alone you think about her but keep yourself busy.

 

The man above has a point, they told me straight up the in my situation "ITS OVER". It sounded harsh to me but I listened as they are top posters and truly do know what they're talking about.

 

Theres nothing wrong with what you did, regardless of the contact here and there and the late night phone calls if she left you its for a reason and you guys will not be together..

 

My advice: Go full NC for a month make it your goal to see if you can do it and to see how strong you are inside. It'll be tough, it'll hurt but you will be bettering yourself and find a new you like myself. After month see if your strong enough to make it another month its what im doing and im #winning like charlie sheen =)

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PegNosePete
so you mean i should just forget about her and move on and never contact her again ?? or can i contact her once i healed, lets say in a yr from now ?

Yes you should forget about her and plan to never contact her again. IF you feel better at some point in the future then you can contact her if you like. But do not put any timescale on that yet. Heal first.

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heartbroken555

i guess you are right, i should just move on and forget about her, but i feel like i messed it up during the relationship, but i learned so much, and the next one i have ill do alot better, i just wish i could go back and repair my mistakes, but i guess i cant...

 

she wasnt perfect either, but i really loved her, and i dont know if we will ever be together again, but if i do, ill be a changed man thats for sure....

 

maybe im just keeping a bit of hope since she hasnt told me its impossible but probable that we will never be together again, and that she wanted to keep in touch by email...

but i have a feeling its false hope, and i shouldnt hang on to it, because it will only slow me down

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