All signs pointing...well most signs

[stoploss11]

The last 3 weeks have been a nightmare. We went from nearly constant communication to hardly any. Her whole world flipped upside down and she pulled away. I let her know I was there for her and tried to give her space. The story is very difficult, it includes her mother going mental and her babies father.

 

We had no communication for 5 days, then i saw her at work and she had been through it noticeably, I kept it light and for a few moments her eyes lit up again when she was looking at me. Then she kind of pulled away. The next morning she went out of her way to let me see the baby was with her and I got to see her beautiful face for a lil bit, unfortunately several others from work were around. I saw her later that day and told her I missed her, and she smiled and looked at me like she used to. I asked her if that was ok, and she nodded and smiled. Also let her know I missed the baby as well. She's so adorable and fun.

 

Then nothing from her for a day and a half. I asked her for a walk at lunch, but her group was swamped and she couldn't. I didnt respond she text me an hour later asking why what going on?

 

I sent a few text at night and no reply, then sent one in the morning saying never mind, and asked her a random question. she replied I didn't get your text last night, I'll try to talk to you on Monday.

 

I don't wanna push her further away but want her to know where I am for her and the baby. Is texting her anymore before Monday foolish? What do I have the rights to ask her on monday?

[spiderowl]

Sorry this has happened and left you so up in the air wondering what the situation is. Clearly, she has been through a lot and that's bound to affect anyone. She has a baby to care for too and that takes a lot out of you. My guess would be that she feels she is caring for too many people at the moment and has little left to give. However, it may also be that her feelings for you were not as strong as yours are for her - that's something one has to bear in mind.

 

I think you have to give her some space now to get her head together. If a lot of stresses have been affecting her, then she is probably feeling very worn out and mixed up. This is not the best time to ask her where you stand. If this is a love relationship for her, then she may just need the space to recover from her stresses and see that you are still there for her. Think about what you were doing for her while all this was going on in her life? Were you a listening ear? Did you offer help? Sometimes when a crisis hits, men seem to react by making a fuss, getting worked up and, inadvertently, demanding attention. This is not what you need when dealing with a family crisis: what you need is a solid, caring person, who simply steps in when needed but doesn't start demanding to know why you are not paying them attention.

 

Having said all the above, it is not uncommon for people to quote too much work, not enough time, family issues, stress, financial issues, and so on, to excuse themselves from not wanting to spend more time with a person they feel less interested in. I am not saying this to upset you, but so that you are aware of all possibilities.

 

Yes, give her space, let her get back in touch with you, don't send any more texts but perhaps give her a 'phone call after a few days. Show her you care and will see her when she's ready, but don't push anything. Give her a couple of weeks. If she's not got back to you and suggested meeting up by then, I think she's intentionally distancing herself and would advise you to let her go. Good luck!