4 years in love, and suddenly gone. 2 week NC and nothing

[abdellost]

So its been two weeks and nothing.

 

 

2 weeks ago on Saturday my girl called crying that she misses me and cant wait to see me.she promised we would go and watch avatar the Wednesday coming up. we had a small/big argument. she wanted to talk to her little sisters guy friends and i said no. I did not say no out of jealousy. Its that when i ask her if i can talk to girls, or if i could talk to my little sisters friends, she would say no because she was to jealous and did not trust the girls. Its ok, she was protective and very loving girl. we had a fight and she gave me good points and such but i was stubborn and said no because its not fair. each time i want to do or say something, she would not agree with it. But when it comes to her or if something comes up exactly alike, she would tell me to she will do it and if i say no its a big problem. Anyways she said im still doing it, its nothing wrong and i will tell u everything we talk about. I said go ahead but i am still hurt and blah blah. The very next day she did not ring me like we always do. we ring twice in the morning when we wake up, 3 times if we go down with our family, 5 times before we sleep, good mornign text messages and goodnight text messages. we knew everything about eachother all day the whole time in a cute way (nothing possessing). so i went down and got her credit for her cell. she then text me saying she feels too guilty and that she cant do this anymore and that it wont work out, we're different and shes sorry its over and to delete our pictures and videos. I was in shock and tried calling her but she wouldnt take my call. after a few tries she took it and was being really cold and saying im sorry, we're going to collide in the future and we wont be happy. i started going crazy and crying for her telling her everything can be wroked out..she was like "no it cant be worked out, this isnt me this isnt who iam. i am sorry, this is harder than i thought" and closed her cell. i called her friends who were in terrible shock. they told me they would get to the meaning of this. They then messaged me telling me im sorry its over.i called her best friend who said "this is for the best, forget about her, theres no chance." he text my sister telling her shes sorry, she never meant this to happen. But that shes not who she is and i changed her. I text her telling her if she ever loved me to write me back, she text my sister telling her to tell me because she did love me she wont write back because she doesnt want to give me hope because there is none, its over. then her friends text me telling me she says "she loved me and she STILL does but she cant be with me, that our world are not the same and it would never work out because we think differently"

 

Before i go further let me explain our situation. I am an American Egyptian, good class but my father got scammed a lot in Egypt and lost millions so we are trying to get back on our feet. Shes pure Egyptian and High class.In egypt, class matters and its really dumb. Its all about "your family name", not the cash. her mom first loved me but after we told her about us she got a little mean. A few times we would cross paths, by sheer luck, and she would catch me with her daughter alone (thats a no no in Egypt). she asked me two times not for this to happen again but the third time, again sheer luck, my girl knew i was playing basketball at the same club she was doing track, she came to say hi then her mom came out of nowhere. In the end her mom was so mad to the point she critized my family and told her not to talk to me. this was 2 years ago. so for 2 years her mom thinks her daughter is not talking to me. I know its wrong but we have no choice until my family gets back on their feet and i go propose. So each time we would go out she would be very stressed and nervous.i would try to calm her down and such...

 

Back to the story, she text messaged me the same day telling me our mentality are different. that she never wanted to grow up like this, worrying about what to wear and how to act. I told her me either, that we changed a lot in the 4 years and we need time to patch it up. she said no, im sorry, theres no more us and can never be. that we did have some stuff in common (bullsh*t, we had everything in common, right down to our favorite colors which is the weirdest mix) but that our worlds are different. my family was a bit religious and her family was very open minded. I told her i did not fall in love with her looks or anything. I fell in love with who she was. when i first meet her i never gave her a second look, until we got to know eachother through being great friends. she then closed her phone for 3 days. I went to her college and waited for her to finish her exams. When she came out she saw me and dashed the other way.i walked after her begging for her to listen and she was just being so mean. telling me its over and theres no hope. i told her i just want to explain my part, she said go ahead. I tried explaining and all i got was "no forget it, theres no hope" then she was like arent u religious, why are u trying to get back with me? yes i am a little religious, i do fear god and such but i am really open minded. and she knows that. i tried holding her hands and she wouldnt let me and tell me to let her go or she would hit me (she was getting stressed out because we were infront of her college and its a big deal for guys and girls to even walk with each other in college,Wierd country a little). then she was like i am trying to be nice, go on with ur life, go back to America and go to college there. Just leave. I told her that Saturday you were crying that you missed me, that you loved me so much and cant let me go. now ur throwing me away. she just said sorry. i then asked her Look at me and tell me you love me. she was like i do not want to lie to you. I started crying and was like how the hell? how 4 years and you dont love me anymore? 3 days ago you were making plans with me and called me up at night crying saying you cant ever make me feel bad because you love me so much. she was like i really dont know if i do or not okay. than i asked her not to shut her phone off, she told me shes changing her number and thats that. than she was like go on with your life, its over. you did mean the world to me i am sorry and walked away. she then a few minutes later text me telling me "delete all our stuff or ill literally hate you"( the pictures and vids are like us kissing and stuff). last month she was tickling me and cracking me up, i was laughing so hard that i said something that i would never thought of saying, i told her "i hate you stop making me laugh so hard", she started crying really hard saying she never wants me to say the "i hate you" ever. she never wants to hear it.i hugged her and told her im sorry. now she messaged me saying she would literally hate me if i don't delete the stuff???? i texted her telling not to worry, to have a good life and to take care of herself.( my friend made me write that, i was breaking down). she text back saying to "please eat=)" (my sister told her i have not ate for 4 days,i couldnt). i was trying to call someone so i rang her by accident and text her telling her sorry i rang by accident. she text back saying its ok please be okay thats all i really want. This was all that same day i talked to her. its been a week and i have not gotten anything. shes going to travel for the first time in 2 days for 2 weeks to Saudi Arabia to visit her dad who works there. We made plans to contact and how we will keep in touch before she goes but this was before she broke it off. i am scared to try calling her number to find it changed. Its too much for me. one day shes crazy about me the next she changes her number? THERE WAS NO HINTS NO ANYTHING. WE argued yes, we fought about dumb stuff. But we would always make up, always.

 

Shes the first in her family to wear the head scarf and her mom makes fun of her about it al the time. All her friends said (recently) that she wore it to make me happy. i told them that we made plans about marriage and what we were going to do, and all our plans were stuff that we could not do if she was wearing the head scarf, so how the hell did i make her?I never looked at another girl, never checked out another girl for 4 years! never thought of being with someone else, never fantized. Before i was with her my family used to make fun of me saying i was a different kind of man, i would close the toilet seat, i would take care of myself, i would you know, just be clean and smart. i never did anything to hurt her feelings like even think of another girl. I am her first, we got togehter when we were 15. So she thinks what i do is normal, not checking girls out and loving her to death. I dont know what to do anymore. Everyone says to ignore her and she would comeback to me. But i dont think so. She was the strongest girl i ever meet. If her dad hit her or yelled, or if her mom made fun of her or anything at all, she would stand tall and not budge and show she doesnt care but come crying to me. She used to tell me i was the only thing that made her weak and nothing can make her weak. I dont know. I am crying every day i cant help it. she was everything to me. For the first time, when i was creating a loveshack account now, i had no pw or username to create! People tell me to go on with my life. I WOULD IF SHE was never like that. she made me addicted to her. if i dont ring her for a few hours she would call worried as hell than mad that i mad her worried. she would love to know every detail of me. if i was buying a shirt, i would call her and ask her what color? what size? what you think of a shirt like this and that. shes just everything. Should i go and talk to her before she leaves in 2 days? what should i do? i cant let her go. this cant end like this. its so unfair. I tried forgetting her but i cant. I used to even look at her body and think its so perfect that i dont want anything at all. You know some guys love their wives and girls to death but they would atleast look and be like hm if she had this and that. I dont. I just love evetrything about her. I fell in love with her mentality! not even her looks. when i first saw her i didnt even take a second look. I am from America. You know the girls are two different things from America to Egypt.

But i fell in love with who she was and how she was. She was so amazing and funny. i adored it. I am scared she doesnt lvoe me anymore or doesnt miss me. Egypt won the African cup yesterday and each time we would watch the game we would ring when a referee was being dumb or when we scored a goal (this was because we couldnt watch the games toghether alot.) this is so unfair. i did not do anything to her. Yes i was a bit strict and wont let her do stuff, just because she wont let me do stuff. I dont want to lose her. I am willing to go fix anythjing..

 

Thanks everyone...

[abdellost]

A few months ago i forgot my cell at home, i thought i lost it in the streets so i didnt bother going home to look for it, and i received 430 MISSED CALLS and 21 messages from her. and she suddenly says shes not sure if she loves me? i dont get whats going on.