Charmaine_Champagne Posted January 1, 2010 Share Posted January 1, 2010 (edited) my ex was my first love, i dated him for 6 years but he dumped me and treated me really badly at the start of the year. i am not over him. during the summer i kissed his old childhood best friend and neighbor and told my ex about it to annoy him and as revenge. he then damaged his friends car and called me a whore in a tirade of abusive txts. well this week i met his friend again and we did a lot more than kiss. we didn't sleep together but did everything else apart from intercourse. this guy is gorgeous, better looking than my ex and i fancy him. but this time i am not going to tell my ex about it, we are NC also this guy has sworn me to secrecy. i felt so elated the night it happened, it was amazing. but now i just feel really down and used as me and the friend are not in contact and he prob just thinks i'm a slut. it was fun at the time but i would much rather do sexual things within a relationship, i was used to being in a relationship. also for new years eve i got ridiculously drunk and lost my cellphone early in the night, it is killing me wondering if my ex texted to wish me a happy new year, but now i will never know. i am so anxious. obviously it would not be an option to date the friend, that would never happen and i knew that but it feels like his friend just used me which isn't nice. i know i should see it as abit of fun but i have a habit of getting too attatched to ppl since my ex left. i'm so upset about the phone any thoughts or advice??? Edited January 1, 2010 by Charmaine_Champagne Link to post Share on other sites
HeavenOrHell Posted January 1, 2010 Share Posted January 1, 2010 You're using him too, to make your ex jealous, so I'm not sure what the problem is? my ex was my first love, i dated him for 6 years but he dumped me and treated me really badly at the start of the year. i am not over him. during the summer i kissed his old childhood best friend and neighbor and told my ex about it to annoy him and as revenge. he then damaged his friends car and called me a whore in a tirade of abusive txts. well this week i met his friend again and we did a lot more than kiss. we didn't sleep together but did everything else apart from intercourse. this guy is gorgeous, better looking than my ex and i fancy him. but this time i am not going to tell my ex about it, we are NC also this guy has sworn me to secrecy. i felt so elated the night it happened, it was amazing. but now i just feel really down and used as me and the friend are not in contact and he prob just thinks i'm a slut. it was fun at the time but i would much rather do sexual things within a relationship, i was used to being in a relationship. also for new years eve i got ridiculously drunk and lost my cellphone early in the night, it is killing me wondering if my ex texted to wish me a happy new year, but now i will never know. i am so anxious. obviously it would not be an option to date the friend, that would never happen and i knew that but it feels like his friend just used me which isn't nice. i know i should see it as abit of fun but i have a habit of getting too attatched to ppl since my ex left. i'm so upset about the phone any thoughts or advice??? Link to post Share on other sites
Author Charmaine_Champagne Posted January 1, 2010 Author Share Posted January 1, 2010 (edited) yeh i guess so, well i was the first time but i actually really like this guy that is the problem. and i'm upset about my phone, feeling down. and don't like the idea that his friend sees me as a slut. what happened between me and him was a big deal to me, it prob didn't even phase his friend. and i still love my ex. and my new years eve was a disaster Edited January 1, 2010 by Charmaine_Champagne Link to post Share on other sites
LovelyDaze Posted January 1, 2010 Share Posted January 1, 2010 yeh i guess so, well i was the first time but i actually really like this guy that is the problem. and i'm upset about my phone, feeling down. and don't like the idea that his friend sees me as a slut. what happened between me and him was a big deal to me, it prob didn't even phase his friend. and i still love my ex. and my new years eve was a disaster Stop now. Don't even deal with another one of his friends again. You are hurting and your behavior lately is based only on that. Please just take a time-out and work on yourself without trying to hook up with whomever. Yes, you're lonely...we all are. But if you want a real relationship that is HEALTHY, stay away from being intimate with his friends or anybody else for awhile. Link to post Share on other sites
2sunny Posted January 1, 2010 Share Posted January 1, 2010 yeh i guess so, well i was the first time but i actually really like this guy that is the problem. and i'm upset about my phone, feeling down. and don't like the idea that his friend sees me as a slut. what happened between me and him was a big deal to me, it prob didn't even phase his friend. and i still love my ex. and my new years eve was a disaster word.... counseling!!!!!! Link to post Share on other sites
Author Charmaine_Champagne Posted January 1, 2010 Author Share Posted January 1, 2010 yeh my behavior is very destructive, if i'm doing things to get back at my ex i am only really hurting myself. his friend is hot tho lol, no but on a serious note, i should prob lay off the alcohol too. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Charmaine_Champagne Posted January 1, 2010 Author Share Posted January 1, 2010 i gave my ex bfs friend a bj up an alley after a club drunk at 2am, wow i am one classy girl. ya know this behavior is so out of character for me seriously. i was with the same guy from i was 17. now i just look like a slut and i would assume that is how his friend sees me? possibly desperate as well? Link to post Share on other sites
hoping2heal Posted January 1, 2010 Share Posted January 1, 2010 my ex was my first love, i dated him for 6 years but he dumped me and treated me really badly at the start of the year. i am not over him. during the summer i kissed his old childhood best friend and neighbor and told my ex about it to annoy him and as revenge. he then damaged his friends car and called me a whore in a tirade of abusive txts. well this week i met his friend again and we did a lot more than kiss. we didn't sleep together but did everything else apart from intercourse. this guy is gorgeous, better looking than my ex and i fancy him. but this time i am not going to tell my ex about it, we are NC also this guy has sworn me to secrecy. i felt so elated the night it happened, it was amazing. but now i just feel really down and used as me and the friend are not in contact and he prob just thinks i'm a slut. it was fun at the time but i would much rather do sexual things within a relationship, i was used to being in a relationship. also for new years eve i got ridiculously drunk and lost my cellphone early in the night, it is killing me wondering if my ex texted to wish me a happy new year, but now i will never know. i am so anxious. obviously it would not be an option to date the friend, that would never happen and i knew that but it feels like his friend just used me which isn't nice. i know i should see it as abit of fun but i have a habit of getting too attatched to ppl since my ex left. i'm so upset about the phone any thoughts or advice??? OP, have you considered counselling? I can remember you and your story from the Summer and you have been on a non stop rollercoaster of self-destruction and bad feelings that apparently is not stopping. You are now setting yourself up to be used for sexual gratification by men? You are going to have NO self esteem left, if you even have any NOW. I get the feeling this goes WAY deeper than just your ex. The man was abusive towards you and did many callous and cold things; if this wasn't a deeper issue you would of gladly said good riddance. I really do think it's time you went in and saw a counsellor to deal with some of these issues. You are really hurting yourself big time. Don't you want to be in a loving, fulfilling relationship that is about pleasure and joy and happiness; not thriving on pain and betrayel and bad feelings? Link to post Share on other sites
xpaperxcutx Posted January 1, 2010 Share Posted January 1, 2010 C_C, I absolutely do think you're starting off on the wrong foot for the New Year. Between your incessant posts about blowjobs and tongue rings, all I can really say is that you better slap yourself out of your daze before you get seriously and emotionally hurt from all of this. Your ex? F--- him. The friend? F--- him as well. Physically remove yourself from both these men and start making new friends. Why not start off the year with resolutions? Cliche, yes, but still effective as a guideline for the things that you do not, I repeat, DO NOT, want to go through again this year. I can imagine you being a beautiful woman with much to offer if you learn to let go of the ex. Link to post Share on other sites
nobmagnet Posted January 1, 2010 Share Posted January 1, 2010 you seem to have pressed the self distuct button my love. Your ex has had a massive impact on how you feel about yourself and that so sad. Please either see a counselling or read some self esteem books. You really need to learn to like yourself........not what you look like but the person inside. We are all very very lonely on here and damaged. I beleive working on yourself especcially as you as still so young will make you a much more attractive woman. sorry if it sounds patronising. It trully isnt ment that way. My mates have done similar things in the past and live with the regret of lowering themselves. chin up duck. We all make mistakes but the important thing is to learn from them and better yourself xxx nob Link to post Share on other sites
name witheld Posted January 2, 2010 Share Posted January 2, 2010 If you want we could meet up for a few drinks and a chat.... You get my point? Link to post Share on other sites
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