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Why did my ex send me a birthday card?


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Three months ago, my girlfriend of 5 years told me she wanted a break. Two months ago, we broke up for good. She said she was no longer in love with me. We have had no contact for the last six weeks, because I told her I did not want any. I wanted this so that I can get over her and so we both have time and space to think about things.

 

We broke up due to her insecurities about the relationship. She was very unsure about her decision to break up and I feel that she is still in love with me. However, I have accepted that the relationship is over and I am trying to move on.

 

She sent me a birthday card a few days ago. I also got a missed call from a blocked ID very late on the night of my birthday. I have not got one of those calls for a long time - is that a coincidence? I was pretty surprised to get the card. I sent her a short text message thanking her for it, because although I do not want contact with her, I want to be polite. She replied with a very brief message. That was it.

 

I am still in love with her but I am trying to get over her. What was the point in sending me a birthday card? Did she just send it to be nice because we went out together for so long? Three weeks ago she told a mutual friend that she felt there were many things that had been left unsaid. I felt by texting her to say thanks that I was giving her the opportunity to say anything she wanted to say. If she was looking for friendship, I think I gave her the opportunity to say something. I feel that if there is to be a discussion about our relationship or getting back together, it has to come from her. I do not know if I would take her back even if she wanted it. I am not chasing her anymore. I have no intention of contacting her again. I know that if she wants to contact me, she will do so. What do you guys think? Thanks for reading this.

 

Joseph,

Calgary, AB

 

P.S. I have posted this on another site - I'm trying to get all the opinions I can!

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LostInLimbo
I think I gave her the opportunity to say something. I feel that if there is to be a discussion about our relationship or getting back together, it has to come from her. I do not know if I would take her back even if she wanted it. I am not chasing her anymore. I have no intention of contacting her again. I know that if she wants to contact me, she will do so. What do you guys think? Thanks for reading this.

 

Joseph,

Calgary, AB

 

P.S. I have posted this on another site - I'm trying to get all the opinions I can!

 

That Says it All, you Did give her a chance to reply, I would leave it as is, the ball is in her court, don't boost her ego, by chasing her, as I know you said you were going to do, to sum it all up again, You Gave her a chance to see if she was wanting to give it another try to no avale, my advice is move on and look to the future, as to whats out there, set her behind you, if she contacts you and your not with someone, great, see how you feel, but rest assured once you find that someone, u won't want her back.

 

Best of luck

LiL

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Thomas X Forever
That Says it All, you Did give her a chance to reply, I would leave it as is, the ball is in her court, don't boost her ego, by chasing her, as I know you said you were going to do, to sum it all up again, You Gave her a chance to see if she was wanting to give it another try to no avale, my advice is move on and look to the future, as to whats out there, set her behind you, if she contacts you and your not with someone, great, see how you feel, but rest assured once you find that someone, u won't want her back.

 

 

OMFG, this was the longest run on sentence I'VE EVER SEEN. Lol

 

On another note. She was probably sending it to be cordial.

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You could either not reply or reply with a quick "Thanks". Confused women will do nothing but rip your heart. When they love you & are loyal it's a great thing but when they are confused like ending the relationship & sending mixed signals..it's usless..continue trying to get over her so the ball will be in your court. I've learned from earlier relationships..when they break up with you & then want you back in their life too soon,it just confuses them even more & they start acting flaky again..keep your pride & distance.

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LostInLimbo
OMFG, this was the longest run on sentence I'VE EVER SEEN. Lol

 

On another note. She was probably sending it to be cordial.

 

lol, not one of my better sentences huh?

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wow...you got a card?!

nice :)

 

2 days ago i got a ****ty 'happy birthday-wising you all the best x' facebook friend request....didnt reply, and i just ignored her request :)

that felt good, i feel stronger now. 1.5 months NC for me. Hope her rebound fails misserably and she comes crawling back

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she is trying to keep the door open. you want her back? sorry, move on. throw the card in the trash and get this pain over with.

 

the next time you are in a 5+ yr relationship and it ends you'll get over it much faster

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I guess I'm envious. My ex didn't give me anything for my birthday when we were together, not even a card. The next year he told me he was going to take me to Omaha, NE for my birthday. He left me 10 days before my birthday and jumped into a relationship with another woman before leaving me. I spent my birthday alone and depressed. On my birthday, I called him crying at 11:25 pm. He told me he didn't think about me that day and he had gone to the carnival with his son.

 

So I guess I can't be objective. : -(

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I wouldn't do or say anything more to her. If the card was really an attempt at something more, she wouldn't stop there. I think if someone breaks up with you and really wants you back, they'll move mountains to be back with you. A birthday card is no mountain.

Keep trying to move on. You've done well so far.

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