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Your Ex shows up and begs for forgiveness....do you take them back?


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DustySaltus

Hypothetical situation here for everyone.....lets say your ex tries to get you fired from your job or something on that level. You move on with your life and they show up a few months later BEGGING for forgiveness. Now this wasn't just a regular relationship...you thought this person was THE ONE. What would you do?

 

In my situation, if you asked me a few days ago I would say probably yes/. But now after processing everything and what occured I would listen, but I honestly can't say I would or wouldn't right then and there.....

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Hypothetical situation here for everyone.....lets say your ex tries to get you fired from your job or something on that level. You move on with your life and they show up a few months later BEGGING for forgiveness. Now this wasn't just a regular relationship...you thought this person was THE ONE. What would you do?
First things first: There is no such thing as "THE ONE." Banish that Hallmark-card myth from your mind right away.

 

Secondly, the answer is a resounding no. Full stop.

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Thomas X Forever

I hate to be the first one to say it, but yes. I will always love her.

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it's one thing to forgive someone for hurting you, and a whole 'nother thing to allow them back into your life! By forgiving that person, you put YOUR mind at rest, and the situation behind you, that's the most important element of forgiveness, from a personal point of view.

 

that doesn't mean you necessarily forget how that person treated you!

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jessicasilver

its already happened but only with one of my exes... only because i loved him and still do and im still with him!! it realy depends on how you feel, does he/she make you happy? is it worth the pain if it happens again? just follow your instinct

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georgia girl

I would want to, desperately, but I'd have to make sure it was for real. For me, the trust is gone. He let me down badly and I've already gone through the worst of the hurt. I'm not going back there for nothing. But, if he was willing to show me - over and over again until I really BELIEVED it - then, yes. But it would take a whole lot more than one contact.

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Hypothetical situation here for everyone.....lets say your ex tries to get you fired from your job or something on that level. You move on with your life and they show up a few months later BEGGING for forgiveness. Now this wasn't just a regular relationship...you thought this person was THE ONE. What would you do?

 

In my situation, if you asked me a few days ago I would say probably yes/. But now after processing everything and what occured I would listen, but I honestly can't say I would or wouldn't right then and there.....

 

There is one rule of thought that I normally go by in situations like this.

 

"Are their actions backing their words?" In other words, if they say they want you back but aren't really making an effort, they aren't being truthful.

 

Showing up at your door begging for forgiveness in my opinion is definitely actions backing words. All I can say is "Don't take them back right away." I would agree to more talks and to taking it slow but I wouldn't be in a rush to go right back where we were before because it would end up the same way.

 

You've literally got to start from scratch again. Learn each other all over. And I hate to say it, but they've got to EARN your trust back and that doesn't come easily.

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Every situation is different. I can't really say "no" I wouldn't although that's what I wish I had the strength to say right now. But part of me thinks he tried hard enough I would. That's not to say that you should. Your post just asked would we. I think lots of us here would. That's why so many of our posts indicate repeatedly being hurt by the one we love. We let them back in over and over.

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