bruised_heart Posted August 26, 2002 Share Posted August 26, 2002 My boyfriend of 3 months has said it'd be better if we were just mates. i don't want that, i want to be his girlfriend, to kiss him and hug him in that certain way. He said the reason is because he's not ready for a serious realtionship and he feels that if he's in one he's becoming too mature and just wantsto be going out and having fun. But the thing is he said a similar thing to his ex girlfriends, so why does he keep getting involved again and then ending up hurting people? I want him back and he doesn't want to be in a reltionship, i don't know how to go on, PLEASE help me. Link to post Share on other sites
Tony T Posted August 26, 2002 Share Posted August 26, 2002 Sorry, you picked the wrong guy. He's a Peter Pan, an adult child, a committment-phobic and it's not likely he's going to change for a good while. There is no good point in sitting around wanting to be the girlfriend of somebody who doesn't want to carry such along anymore. Your best bet is to chalk up your losses and move on. I do not advise you being his friend, either. There is simply no point in it. If you have special feelings for him, you will be hurt a lot more when he begins seeing even another lady he will eventually hurt. Stop thinking about getting back with him. It's a dead end situation and there's absolutely nothing there for you. Just stay away from him, PERIOD!!! Link to post Share on other sites
clia Posted August 27, 2002 Share Posted August 27, 2002 I'm with Tony. He told you what he wants. Listen to him. (Why do women have such a hard time with this?) Don't be friends with him. Don't call him, e-mail him, IM him, text message him, etc. Cut off all contact and move on with your life. Chalk it up to experience. He doesn't want a relationship and there's nothing you can do about it. Oh well, HIS LOSS, right? Link to post Share on other sites
Ally Boo Posted August 27, 2002 Share Posted August 27, 2002 Keep in mind that 3 months isn't long at all. I try not to get myself too wrapped up into a relationship unless we've been together like a year or close to it. BC that first part is all trial time and best behavior time. Link to post Share on other sites
k7a51c0n Posted August 28, 2002 Share Posted August 28, 2002 For your info,you certain have found the wrong guy to be with.Some guys have their own reason maybe for him this might be the possible reason,He's still would like to enjoy freedom of his own e.g if his attached with you,can he have the full freedom of his own? I doubt so.Which girl don't wish to be in control of their own guys?I think he's trying to be close friends with you and maybe his ex,but you all tends to get the wrong answer as he takes extremely gd care or concern abt them.Don't worry there's a lot of guys in this world,but out of 10,only maybe 3 or 4 of them are gd guys.So take care of yourself when choosing your guy or your life partner.Don't get sex involved in relationship.Love doesn't need sex to work out a relationship.Life is still long. Link to post Share on other sites
velvet Posted August 28, 2002 Share Posted August 28, 2002 Some people don't want to be or feel like their in a r/s because of the responsibility's and worries of not having fun, having to answer to you, tell you what their doing, when and at one time. Those are just a few of reasons why a person doesn't want a r/s or it could be that they want a different ass for every night of the week. I think when starting off with a new person slow is the way to go. Some people move quick and could marry a person within 3 months but the majority of the time thats very unlikely. In the future pace yourself, don't get romantically involved unless you know you have potential with that person as far as r/s goes. Usually you have those answers instinctively. May not sound like much advice, but I guarantee it could go a long way. Link to post Share on other sites
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